(Closed) I can't plan this thing on my own…

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

AwwwAwe ewe, I immediately looked at your location because if you were close, I would help in a heartbeat. Maybe you can get support from the gals here And your Fiance for things that you have to go look at in person? There are some amazing plannes here that could help you in even from afar.


Post # 4
46263 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You are stressing your self out unnecessarily. You have a whole community of online friends who will be glad to help.

Some brides might even look enviously upon you. No one to undermine their decisions or fail to keep appointments.

You can still assign some jobs to the Dude- like the playlist, groomsmen’s gifts. Of course he will consult with you before he makes any final decisions but he can at least do the groundwork.

 There are Bees from your area who can help with suggestions for venues, vendors etc.

Let us know what help you need. As a group, we can source just about anything!

Post # 6
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I feel the same! Everyone who would love to help is far away.  Thank goodness for the bees! It will be okay 🙂 It is a bit stressful, I have never planned a party before and now we are planning the biggest one of our lives!  If you need any help, let me know! Sometimes it just helps to write or talk out your ideas to get a better feel of how it will all come together.  

Post # 7
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

@autumnmountainbride:  Have you visited theknot.com?  They have a checklist that pretty much lists everything under the sun for weddings, as well as a budget calculator to help you keep your finances in order.  I’m in a similar situation since all of my family live in FL, while I’m in VA.  The Bridal Party is scattered all over the place (and none of them near me) and FH is deployed, so my cat and dog are my companions these days, lol.  I also have “liked” pretty much every wedding page on FB and follow their Twitter as well.  Yes, it’s not like having someone giving you feedback on your ideas or being a listening ear for when you just want some of the girls to hang with you and talk wedding, but it does help a little.  Over the last couple weeks, I have felt like you do…everyone is too busy to talk and doesn’t seem as excited or interested as me in the wedding stuff (not even FH, which is understandable, given his current situation).  I just let it go and go back to the Bee for company, lol.  :-p

Post # 8
535 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’ve been feeling the same. I have older brothers, and while I’m close to my sisters in law, they all live too far away. My mom died a few years ago, & my guy’s mom is pretty much estranged. About 3 days in to the engagement I had a meltdown about it. Fortunately my maid of honor and her mom are like family, but like you said no one cares as much as you do. Makes me wish things were different, but all I can do is keep on planning and be gracious about friends offering to help.

Post # 9
3 posts
  • Wedding: February 2013

I can relate! Im in VA but my entire family is in IA and AZ.  We’re on a shoe string budget  and jokingly say the theme of our wedding is Dollor Store.  You’re not alone, this website has giving me some great tips and websites to find cheaper ways of doing things.  What’s helped me is doing one piece at a time, for instance I’ll work on flowers for a while before I try to tackle reception food etc

Post # 10
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@autumnmountainbride: I feel your pain!  I have had these same exact feelings. As I began making plans I begged my FI to let me get a wedding planner.  I do not have the confidence in myself to pull this off. Of course he believes we can make it happen together, without the help of a planner.  We are 11 months out and he is already tired of me driving him crazy about all the details.  I share your perfectionism.  I have to have everything matching and just so or it will drive me insane!!!!   My best friend/maid of honor is 2 hours away.  She gives me awesome support over the phone but I would love to have her closer.  My mother and I are not that close and my father lives 6 hours away. With that being said, this is definately the best place to be.  The hive has been a great place for inspiration.  Any question you can think of, or at least I have thought of, has been asked and answered on here.  I hope that you find the support you need and it get easier as you get closer to your day! 

Post # 11
986 posts
Busy bee

We’re ALLLLLL here to talk you through anything you need help with, and like julies1949 mentioned, sometimes other people can (even unintentionally) make it very difficult to make decisions, keep appointments, etc. In the end, you may be glad you got to do a lot of planning alone.

My Maid/Matron of Honor is in FL, and other BMs are nearby but not as interested, so I’ve done most of the planning solo/with Maid/Matron of Honor and one Bridesmaid or Best Man via text/email/calls. It’s actually worked out really well for me because I’m a control freak anyway!

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