I can't stand my FIL

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

@LadyElva:  You poor thing. Your FIL sounds like my FFIL, ridiculous aggressiveness for no reason and he just sounds like an ass. 🙁 I don’t have any advice except to ignore him as much as humanly possible and avoid him! 

Post # 4
Member
1793 posts
Buzzing bee

I hope you and your DH have decided not to discuss your business or lives in front of this man if you have any decisions pending (like remodeling, buying a car, having kids, etc).  He sounds like the kind of guy you tell after you have done something.  How does your DH deal with him?  He sounds horrid and I would want as little contact with him as possibile, especially once I had kids.

Post # 5
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

@LadyElva:  what is feijoa?

sorry, your vent was totally valid, I did read the whole thing. But I just have to know what feijoa is.

Post # 6
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

UGH. You poor baby! He sounds like SUCH a DOUCHE!

I mean, my FIL is a pretty douchey guy (he made his 32 year old daughter have a shot gun wedding by teling her they wouldn’t accept the child unless she was married. He also refers to her as “The Bitch”. Which she DEFINITELY isn’t!)

But yours sounds SO. MUCH. WORSE!

What a NIGHTMARE! On the bright side, it sounds like you live a little ways away from them. Thank goodness!

Post # 7
Member
3598 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

He sounds just awful.  I wouldn’t let him around my kids at all unless he gets a personality transplant.

Post # 9
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

He sounds like my FFIL. He absolutely hates my guts.Everything I say or do is wrong and I cant seem to win. I just try to ignore him and avoid him.

Post # 10
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

@LadyElva:  yum! Where can I obtain such a fruit? Is it pronounced fay-wah?

Post # 12
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

@LadyElva: lol I was way off! It totally looks like a Spanish word, I thought I might be able to find it at a local Mexican market. Sounds good though. If I’m ever lucky enough to visit New Zealand or Australia I’ll be sure to look for feijoa jam. 

Post # 14
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@LadyElva:  My family is from NZ, we were so excited to see feijoas in the supermarket a couple of months ago, first time i’ve seen them since moving here 12 years ago, but they were $1.85 EACH! outragesous.

I’m sorry your FIL is such a jerk 🙁

Post # 15
Member
4540 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Royalton White Sands

I would’ve lost my mind. I admire your self-control!

Post # 16
Member
905 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@LadyElva:  Gah!  This is exactly how my FI has told me to cope with spending time with his quasi-stepfather.  “Just don’t pay any attention to him.”  Umm, sorry, how about we refuse to tolerate his bullshit?!  Why are we letting him get away with being such a terrible influence on everybody’s lives???  FI can just sit there and let it wash over him, but I can’t.  Every action and word makes me want to smack the man.

Quasi-stepfather has been with FMIL for ~15 years, so he was the only father figure during the formative years of my FI and his 3 siblings.  All 4 of them show countless signs of having to live with that man, and none of them are good.  Better to have no father figure than a bad one.

I could go ON and ON about the things he does and says, but at least my situation has a somewhat happy ending.  Quasi-stepfather and FMIL have taken a step back in their relationship, and quasi-stepfather has moved out into his own house.  We are no longer required to spend time with him, and it is my fondest hope that he drifts farther and farther away and we never have to see him again.  FMIL deserves SO much better in a partner.

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