Post # 1
So I did something beyond moronic and I told SO that I might propose to him on 2/29, the one and only day where women are allowed to propose, lol. He looked mortified, and I took his reaction as a confirmation that he didn’t love me enough, he wasn’t sure about me, etc. (to my defense, I drank like 2 glasses of Sake wine and I had not had anything to drink in 2 months so it hit my liver fast).
He said “let me do it”. That made me smile. But the next day when I was sober, we talked rationally about it. He’s not going to be ready for another year, when he has confirmation of being cancer free. His reasons are legit, so I’m going to back away. I realized that I only wanted to propose to prove to him that I’m in this with him for the long haul, no matter how tough things get. He starts chemo treatments on 2/20 and will be kind of sick for a few months afterward, probably into late Spring. I seriously thought me proposing would be so romantic!! But SO didn’t see it that way, lol! He wants to be engaged when he is at his shining best, not when he’s living at home, on medical leave, depressed and fighting cancer. I didn’t realize men and women were so different. I would be floored if he proposed if I were in that situation!
Now SO pokes fun at me for my idea. Ugh, shut up! I was drunk! lol
Would any of you be swept away if you were proposed to while sick? Or am I just a nut?
Post # 3
I think he definitely wants to enjoy an engagement with you. That’s why he’s given you the timeline that he has. I’m sure he knows you’re here for him (you’ve already shown that!) Just take his chemo one day at a time and be patient 🙂
Post # 4
I would be touched I think but I totes understand where he’s coming from. He wants to be strong and able to care for you like a proper man, he doesn’t want to feel like shit during the times where you both are supposed to be elated and joyful and excited. Its one of those male rules they like to make for themselves, sounds like you have a keeper :3 You can make him a surprise for that date even if it isn’t an actual proposal, that way it’ll be cute and still protect his male pride hehe <3
Post # 5
I’m sick, with heart issues that aren’t going away anytime soon, and my SO proposed knowing all of it and even that I could potentially not live a super long time. It’s way hard for both of us to face, but the fact that he wants to marry me no matter what is amazing. 🙂 I’m sure your SO has great reasons for wanting to wait, but I also think it probably did mean something to him that you wanted to propose. Sometimes men feel dumb about having feelings, so they play it off as a joke…I think it probably meant a lot to him, but let him propose on his own terms. He sounds like a keeper! 🙂
Post # 6
haha omg, I had a similar discussion with my SO a few weeks ago. I said Leap Year Day was coming up and he was like yeah so? I said well I could propose to you on that day. He was quiet, so I asked him if he would say yes and he said he would, but he wouldn’t be happy because he wants to propose to me. That calmed me down a bit lol, but I’m still thinking about it lol
Post # 7
Ahhh I don’t think any man really wants to be proposed to ? Lol with exceptions of course. But from the PPs if they get quiet or act weird, it’s a definite no. I think many men feel like it’s their job and I’ll have to agree. To the OP…I think it’s really sweet that you want to prove to your man that no matter what happens in life, you want to be the one with him through all of it. And I’m 100% sure that he knows that too 🙂 You and him are both brave for going through cancer together and when he feels better I know he will propose to you. You have put in the time and you have already proven your commitment to him by staying by his side. I don’t think that goes unrecognized 🙂 Just have patience if you can, and focus on living each day to the fullest. It’s HARD but we can’t let the “waiting” take up all of brain space…we need to nurture our relationships and it will happen! I totally empathize with you, but I know that man will propose to you as soon as he feels it’s the right time.
Post # 8
I think it could have been way worse and you played it off like you were just joking around anyway!