I DO or I DON'T???

posted 2 years ago in Interfaith
Post # 2
Member
653 posts
Busy bee

It’s not a great idea. The bible says do not be unequally yoked.  Your faith should center around God if that’s what you believe in, and I’m not saying your relationship won’t work, but the person who believes would miss out on SO much in their faith if their husband/wife couldn’t support them and guide them in that way. 

Post # 3
Member
145 posts
Blushing bee

Lolabird:  I’m the non-believer and my SO is Catholic and it honestly doesn’t do anything to our relationship.  He is aware of my beliefs, or lack thereof, and it honestly doesn’t bother him or his family.  There’s nothing wrong with it.

It definitely depends on the couple though.  I know some people who must be with someone who shares similar beliefs and there’s nothing wrong with that either.

Post # 4
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Lolabird:  I am unsure how that would work once kids are in the picture. I think it would be hard with or without kids honestly, and I wouldn’t have married someone who didn’t share my beliefs.

Post # 5
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I think it’s totally fine as long as it’s agreed on ahead of time what kind of approach the couple will take with regards to: talking about religion to one another & among friends & family, raising children, celebrating holidays, etc. 

Good communication makes a lot of things easier.

Post # 6
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - The Fairmont, SF

Honestly, I think it’s fine. I was raised Catholic, identify as a Christian, believe in God, and go to church when I can. My FI is a lapsed Catholic with zero interest in religion and, in fact, is adamantly opposed to “forcing” our religious beliefs onto our kids.

I know it wouldn’t work for a lot of believers, but I’m okay with the arrangement my FI and I have. Live and let live – I know that my faith will remain despite him occasionally rolling his eyes at me. We’ve agreed that I will be allowed to share Christmas and Easter mass with the kids but unless they express an interest in the church and Christianity that I won’t impose anything other than those two religious services on them. 

Like geneva2: said, communication is everything. 🙂 

Post # 7
Member
2428 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My husband and I were raised with different religions, but neither of us really follow them anymore and it doesn’t affect our relationship. We’re always respectul if it ever comes up. The most important thing to us is how we want to raise our kids and we’ve decided that religion will have no bearing on that whatsoever.

Post # 8
Member
3331 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Lolabird:  I think it really depends on the people and how devout they are/how much they practice. I don’t believe in a god, but I’m ok with those that do, as long at they don’t shove it down my throat. I think I could have a decent relationship with someone who considered themselves a Christian and maybe went to church on holidays. But I don’t think I could stand being with someone who prayed all the time and went to church every week. I also could not be with someone who doesn’t accept evolution or thinks that gay people are evil. 

Post # 9
Member
671 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

it depends on how strong their faith is but I think in time it may possibly matter because that strength can change. Right now someone may only attend on holidays and it may not be very important to them but people can change, I am one of them.

  • This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  Mrslovebug.
Post # 10
Member
191 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I am a Catholic and my partner is a staunch Athiest, we have been together ten years and there has never been a problem. He respects my belief, I respect his. 

Our daughter, as we both decided will choose her own path in life. She isn’t baptised but goes go a Catholic school. If she wants to do her first communion, she can get baptised if she wants to. 

It has honestly never been a problem for us. Take it from ten years of experience, it’s fine! 

Post # 11
Member
1532 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

It’s ok as long as you respect each other’s beliefs. If not – big problems.

Also it depends if like your family is going to disown you over it.

Post # 12
Member
746 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

SithLady:  I’m a Christian and I also could not be with someone who doesn’t accept evolution or thinks that gay people are evil. <br /><br />I go to a liberal church and DH is some kind of non-practicing agnostic/Buddist. I don’t think it’s hurt our relationship, but I also though it would be taken to a deeper level if we both were God-based. The biggest issue so far is that we’ve had some rough life stuff going on and we don’t really know the words to comfort each other. Under normal circumstances, however, it doesn’t really come up.  I have much more in common with him than I do fundamentalists, and honestly, some of them would push me farther away from God than would an agnostic husband.

Post # 13
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think it depends on how your practice your faith and how important it is to you.  Could you raise a child with a person who does not believe in God?  How will you feel if your spouse doesn’t pray with you or go to church with you.  I think it all depends on how important God is in the life of the Christian.

Post # 14
Member
3136 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I am a christian and my husband is not. I don’t discuss my faith with him and vice versa. Its not my job to convert him and he doesnt make me feel stupid about me. 

Post # 15
Member
3331 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

4littlekitties:  Exactly, there is a big difference between a liberal Christian and a fundamentalist. While, as an atheist, I feel like I could have a relationship with a liberal Christian and be fine for the most part, there is no way that I could find common ground with a fundamentalist Christian. 

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