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I voted I do ... but to me they both mean the same thing so it doesnt matter to much to me... its just a matter of preference ... i do is definately more traditional
I don't think it really makes a huge difference, but I just love the idea of saying "I do".
I know it doesn't really "matter" as far as one being better or worse than the other - but def. more which one do you prefer the sound of. :)
I have always heard "I Do" on the movies and stuff so that's what I always saw myself saying if/when I got married =) Of course, I will probably be so nervous on the actual day that I will repeat whatever the officiant says...LOL
I used to play around as a little girl saying "I do," until one day when my mother told me the actual traditional words were "I will." She was right too--our church vows state "I will."
I like the traditional "I Do" - just what I've always dreamed of saying :)
I really like the tradition of saying "I do" (as do many of my couples!), and I usually only use "I will" for group vows or if the parents or family members do vows (actually, because it sounds slightly less wedding-y, so it doesn't feel like the non-bride and groom are getting married) OR if my couple provides vows and uses "I will."
We used "I do" because of the traditional sentiment behind it. It felt very "wedding."
The Anglican liturgy (all 3 versions of it -- we get to choose which marriage liturgy we want!) say I will, so that's by far the most common set of vows here, and has been since at least the Book of Common Prayer in 1662.
So I'll be saying 'I will' and I'm glad. I like it better. I don't agree that it's not traditional -- 'I do' feels a lot more modern to me.
We're doing "I will." Our church's vows ask if we will be doing all of the vows. So, we will be answering in that. The "I do" isn't something I had really thought about before. So, I was okay with the difference.
I don't really prefer one version over the other.
I just think it's important to express the wording you want to your officiant. To answer a question properly, you should respond with the same wording. If the question is "Will you", the proper respponse is "I will" so you just have to make sure the question is worded as "do you" if that's what you want to say.
The only thing that bugs me is when the question is worded "will you" and people say "I do". It sounds funny. Nails on a chalkboard for me....
I like "I Do" better, but I'm sure it's just because that is what I'm used to hearing.
I have been in several weddings where the officiant has explained that "I Do" is for hollywood, "I Will" is what is "correct"
We said We Will - but we had MANY people tell us afterwards how moving our ceremony was - so We Will vs We Do, doesn't matter.
My friend told me about a wedding she went to where the priest explained why he prefers "I will" rather than "I do".
Basically, he said something along the lines of "Yeah, we know you DO - you're here, all dressed up, ready to exchange rings, and then go party. Of course you do. But, WILL you take this person to be your partner, 10 years down the road, when times are tough and it's not all flowers and champagne? Will you be there for them if they are going through depression, addiction, job loss, or sickness?" etc. etc. just basically stressing that "I will" conveys more of a future promise, rather than just an immediate promise. (obviously "I do" is a promise for the future too, it's just semantics).
I was raised Catholic, but we're getting married in the Episcopal Church, so I was kind of turned off by "I will" until I heard that story. I thought it was kind of cute. :)
@polkadot, that's a really lovely story. I love the idea of future promise being implied in the word 'will'. Thanks!
"I will" is what I've heard more in actual weddings (as opposed to in movies, etc).
But having "I do" so engrained in my head from everything else, I did a bunch of research about it before our wedding (I'm a dork who researches everything) to find out the whys of the difference. I found a whole history of the "I will"s and "I do"s that was actually quite intersting...of course I don't remember the details (I have no memory). What I did learn was that "I will" is the proper/traditional wording, but the reasons for that were ones that didn't sit that well with me (unfortunately the reasons are the details I now forget). Between that and having "I do" already engrained, we decided to go with "I do".
I like Polkadot's explanation of the "I will" much better :)
I REALLY wanted to say "i do" and we structured our vows as such. However, DH got a little confused during the ceremony and repeated what the pastor said, which was something long and awkward....instead of "I do". I copied him so he wouldn't feel like an idiot lol, but I smacked him later. I really wanted the traditional vow. oh well =]
Maybe we are doing this wrong...I have us repeating, "I, ET wedding, take you, Mr ETwedding, to be my wedded husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish. I will love and honor you all the days of my life."
Where do we say the "I do" part?? I'm creating the ceremony myself - my cousin is being ordained online to perform the ceremony.
We're saying our full vows because we felt like just saying "I do" wasn't enough. We really wanted to communicate the depth and seriousness of our vows and therefore decided to write them and say the whole thing.
ETwedding - if you google "wedding ceremony script" you'll find tons of exactly that - SCRIPTS!
I'm also on projectwedding.com and a TON of brides over there have their own FULL SCRIPTS that they wrote or used on their bios/blogs. :)
I am trying to write some of my own script but will elave most of it up to my godfather/minister.
Our original vows were "I Will" but I had our officiant to change them to "I Do" for us, I've just always imagined saying "I Do", I've never been to a wedding where they say "I Will"!
@ Junebride I am curious why did you need to ave a legal ceremony prior to your wedding. I've noticed a few bees say this. But havn't come across it in RLF
@simpleandchic
my husband and I were married this past April "legally" due to insurance reasons. Basically he has had scoliosis since childhood and has two steel rods in his back - fused to his spine. About two years ago it started to form a "pimple" at the base of his spine and where the rods were attached and it got pretty gross - and I'll leave it at that. lol.
He does not have insurance with his job and I have INCREDIBLE insurance with mine. My job will allow "domestic partnership" with putting someone you're not married to ON your insurance - but I wouldn't have been able to do that til this month - which is "open enrollment" whereas - with a "lifechanging event" such as marriage or a child - you can immediately put the person on your insurance - so we decided to have a small ceremony on our deck with my parents and our best friends (my MOH and her husband) as witnesses. We haven't told too many people - obviously the people there plus his mom are really the only people who know (outside of the bee, of course, lol) :)
It is hard to always call him my "fiance" but we do what we have to do! :)
But I put him on my insurance the very next day and a month later he got his desperately needed surgery. He would NOT have been able to wait 6 months he needed it then. And, btw, surgery went perfectly and he's doing great!
I know this is a reason a lot of bee's have had a legal ceremony before their wedding.
We didn't say either...during the declaration of intent we answered "I have" (that's the part where the officiant says, "Have you come here of your own free will with the intent to be married?"). During the vows, she said them line by line and we each repeated after her, rather than having her read the whole thing and answering "I do" or "I will." However, we did phrase our vows as a promise that continues into the future, for exactly the reasons polkadot explained.
I prefer "I do." To me, when you say I do, you are promising in that moment, right there before all your friends and family. I will sounds like something you are promising at some undetermined time in the future, when you get around to it. That's probably something only I hear, but that's the way I feel about it.
Originally I was leaning more towards "I do" because "I will" feels to me like "Oh, yeah maybe in the future I'll adhere to these vows... but not now!" After some thought I do like "I will" more... or even better having your own vows!
We're having our own vows, but still wanted the traditional repeat after me. The ones we modified say "I will." I never really thought about I will vs. I do, other than that I feel like I will is a promise - our written vows have more to do with the "I do" since they are kind of what led us to the alter.... and the repeated vows are the "I will" promise for the future.
I agree with ddubzz............ I do is a classic. The way it sounds just makes my heart melt..........
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ok - so have any of you thought of which you would rather say?
I've always thought of a wedding ceremony being the "I Do's"....yet at our legal ceremony (we had one of our ministers perform the legal ceremony) and she asked, "will you" so we said "I will"...
I've been searching ceremony scripts and I'd like to write our wedding ceremony (with traditional vows, "do you, name here, take, name here, to have and to hold, for richer for poorer, til death do you part", etc...) that I will talk to my godfather (who's a minister and performing our wedding ceremony) about...
but one thing that keeps sticking out is that I definitely want him to ask "Do you" and not "will you"...
anyone else have a preference? Or - did you / will you respond in some other way?