(Closed) I don't feel like doing %&*[email protected]

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1087 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Hi Date Twin! I have to say that I feel the same way! I had a discussion with Fiance though and I think a lot of it was the stress of doing EVERYTHING for the wedding and also working and worrying about the house (which seems to always be a mess because I have had little time to keep it clean….and we are both kind of messy). So, Fiance has started to be more sensitive to how I have been feeling and has been helping me more with decisions for the wedding (details like ceremony, seating, tracking down people etc…which he had NO interest in) AND has been trying to take care of the house a little more. I think I am starting to come around….still have my mopey days though. Either way, I know it has to get done.

Post # 4
150 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I felt the exact same way. I almost even thought that maybe I should put off the wedding; however, I would have regretted putting it off. Mostly, it’s the stress getting to you. I thought I wasn’t stressed, but the closer it got to the wedding day, the more I started freaking out. 

I was supposed to have a candy buffet, but that didn’t happen. We ended up putting out the cookies I had made, but they were just sitting out and people would pick them up and eat them, but nobody took them home (Cookies were the favors). My chocolate fountain never got put up because nobody realized there was a missing part in the middle of it (after someone had borrowed the dang thing), there was not a speech, and there were quite a few other things missing. The best advise is to get recruits (friends, bridesmaids, family, FI) to start helping out as much as possible while you still have time. If you wait closer to the day before, it’ll be harder to make sure everything is “just right”.

And, even though I feel like there were a lot of aspects missing from my wedding, I am glad to say it was a success (nobody really noticed the flaws except when I mention it to them). 

Post # 5
504 posts
Busy bee

I’m a date triplet and I feel exactly the same way and I’m not even the bride. I’m planning everything for my daughter. I was totally excited at first and I would stay up late doing projects.

I havent done a damn thing in the past 2 weeks and I need to get on it.

Post # 6
327 posts
Helper bee

i think most people feel like that, when we first started doing something, we will get super excited and enthusiastic. after that we just feel like do not want to do it.never mind, ask someone to help you out and you will finish your project in no time 

Post # 7
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

Usually my advice would be to take a break and come back to planning when you feel refreshed. With your wedding so close I would make a list of uncompleted projects and prioritize the things you really want there or would miss and start with those things. Get Fiance to help, and maybe some wine and get to work. It is hard towards the end to keep going, but you can do it!

Post # 8
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - Lake Taghkanic State Park

I don’t think it’s that you’re not excited, You just seem like your stressed. Maybe have a day where you have some friends over (bridesmaids, mom, cousins?) and put them to work! haha. Have them help you get the centerpieces done. That’s what they’re there for! Maybe ask your Fiance to dump some candy in jars, or to read you your food selections while you type up the menu.

It’s hard trying to do everything youself, but it might be fun to just have a little planning party or girls day to relax and also get some stuff done. Once you have less of a mountain of work to do your wedding will feel more like an party and less like a deadline. 🙂

Post # 9
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

From everything I’ve read here, this is SUPER common. I like the idea of a prioritized list, and then the other tip I’d give you (and this is really good for any time I need to be productive, not just wedding stuff) – set aside very specific periods of time to work with good breaks built in. For example – Go work on wedding stuff for 45 minutes, then give yourself a 30 minute break. Repeat as many times as needed. You can change the numbers to suit your preference (when I am cleaning, I like 15 on/15 off). It’s much easier to think, “Okay, I only need to work for 15 minutes, then I get a break… I can do anything for 15 minutes.” And I’m much more productive during that time. I even set a timer.

Post # 10
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I definitely know how you feel!  I was the same way before my wedding… I had all these projects laying around every part of our apartment & I just had no energy to finish them all!  I had to force myself to finish them.  It wasn’t so bad once I got my momentum up.  

We’re still trying to get rid of all the extra wedding crap & clean up from all the festivities.. LoL.  Just don’t worry a whole lot about the “mess” for now.  As long as the kitchen & bathrooms are decent, you’ll survive.  There will be plenty of time for cleaning up the mess from doing projects & stuff after everything is done.  Hang in there!

Post # 11
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

This is common.  I think it’s time to prioritize, and ask for lots of help.  To me the centerpieces and escort cards would be the most important.  Followed by the programs.  If you get in a pinch you can go get table numbers at the craft store and just glue something on.  I think mine took 20 minutes.  Leave the menus for last because those are extra, or maybe put on or two at each table instead of at every seat.  Take a deep breath, call your friends and family and dive in.  FI has to help too.  Don’t do it all alone.  After the wedding, no one will remember what your tiny details looked like, so don’t kill yourself trying to make them perfect.

Post # 12
2693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I had my moments when I was so tired of planning I had to take a break. It happens… you may be burnt out.  Take abreak.  I know you still have a lot to do and not much time but you can take a week off, and do nothing wedding related (hide the unfinished DIY projects so they are not a constant reminder) and try to get back to normal for a week.  

Post # 13
986 posts
Busy bee

As some PPs mentioned, just finish what’s most important to you. Place a giant menu (chalkboard style, perhaps) at the venue entrance, and people can glance at it there. Programs aren’t totally necessary, so you really could skip those unless it’s a must have for you. Try to enjoy the last few days before the wedding!

Post # 14
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

hey date twin!!  LOL, i feel your pain! i have been all gung-ho about the wedding and now that it’s close there is so much still to do and i don’t want to do anything!  i’ve been working a lot and then my parent’s are going through something so after dealing with all that, i just want to go to bed!  but, i’m prioritizing with a list and putting the most time consuming things on there first and just doing them for a few hours in the evening or on the weekends. some stuff i can’t do until the day before the wedding (decorations) but just trying not to stress about everything!  Hang in there, we are all almost done!  with Thanksgiving next week it’ll fly by and then we will be married MRS!!!

Post # 15
1311 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think this may be because you analized the crap out of it ? LOL

I assume you thought and thought about the projects and worn out the excitement of it all plus you propably put too much on yourself and didn’t give yourself enought time that now you are crashing.

Go to a yoga class, clear your mind, get a full night sleep and even get a massage…. Then call up your reinforcements and get the stuff done! 🙂

You can do this 

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