(Closed) I don't know any of the guests at my shower!?

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
46264 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@sofialovesmikey:  My Mom’s friends hosted a shower for me. Apparently it was tradition in their group.

I made sure that someone who did know all the women sat beside me- the hostess in your case?- so they could whisper to me  “the lady in the red dress with the long hair”. I could then turn to face the correct guest and say ” Thank you so much. They will go perfectly with our…”

As far as recognizing them, I would’t  worry too much about claling them by name. It’s fairly easy to make conversation without actually using any names.

Remember to request a list of their names and addresses from the hostess for thank-you notes.

Post # 4
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

First and foremost, I am sorry that you have had to endure the hardship of losing you Mother at such a young age… and are now facing your Wedding without her

That has to be difficult.

(( HUGS ))

As for the shower… set your mind at ease, this is perfectly fine.

There are several types of showers… the ones we all hear about / are familiar with where a Bridesmaid or Relative Hosts… and the Guests are all well known to the Bride and Invites to the Wedding

And then there are Showers (of LOVE) that come from associations that the Bride has made thru her life…

Be they a with a gang from work, a group from her social interests (Volunteering, Church Choir, Brownie Leaders or the Gals at the Gym)… they are aware that none of them will get an invite to the Wedding but they know the Bride and want to celebrate with her

There then are the 3rd group… the Neighbours down the street from where she grew up as a kid, the Church Ladies… or in this situation a grouping of her Mother’s Nearest & Dearest Friends

It may seem unusual, or awkward to you at first… but this truly is a shower filled with LOVE and Best Wishes (people giving from their hearts, knowing that there is nothing in return for them… folks who don’t expect to be invited to the Wedding)

I advise you to “go with the flow” here…  because it really is the closest thing to your Mother being present in the moment (how incredibly beautiful that she has such dear friends to remember you, her Daughter in this important moment in your life)

You will survive.  Someone sweet will help you thru the task as julies1949:  has said… (and your Mom will be there looking down from heaven upon you the whole event).  Embrace the LOVE.

Call up the Hostess, and tell you are a tad nervous, not knowing all your Mom’s friends as well as you should.. BUT you will be happy to attend.

I don’t think you will regret it.

You my dear should count your Blessings, because you are truly LOVED. 


Post # 5
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@sofialovesmikey:  I’m so sorry about your mom. It sounds like a lot of people really loved her and, by default, love you! Accept the shower. It’s fine that you barely know them and aren’t inviting them… they just want to show their love & respect for your mother, and take care of her daughter and she would have herself. It’s a lovely idea!

Post # 7
1431 posts
Bumble bee

@sofialovesmikey:  That is so sweet of them to offer. I agree that I would be a little uneasy knowing I was going to a shower where I didn’t know anyone but just remember it will only be a few hours max. It could be a great way to hear some neat stories about your mom too.  Are you good with small talk with strangers? If not I would just think up some questions that could spark up conversation if it gets a little awkward. Ask them about their famiy, if any of their daughters have gotten married, what was their wedding like, how they met your mothers, ect.

Sorry about your mom, I am sure she is smiling down on you at this special time in your life!

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