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Thats what I told my husband after I watched my baby spit up blood from eating off my bloody nipple. He had a minor freakout, thinking I was talking about being a mom in general and not just breastfeeding. Like I would ever want to leave this sweet little face!

I already told my birth story and struggles with breastfeeding here, and even with lots of support and encouragement from all you lovely ladies, my family, and husband, I decided to stop. After only one week of trying :( It just became way too much. I'm in so much pain, which I know is normal, but I just can't take it. I dread feeding time. I hate every second of it. It's not a good bonding time for us because I'm in so much pain and so stressed out. I don't even like doing skin on skin b/c my boobs always hurt when I put her on my chest. Well they always hurt no matter what. I hate giving up so quickly, but I really can't take it, and I think it's best for both of us if we just switched to formula.

Only a day of formula and my life is so much better! I was able to get some sleep because my husband can feed her now too. My boobs are already feeling better. I love feeding time, she sucks on her little bottle and looks into my eyes. As much as I wanted to breastfeed, I just feel like it wasn't for me, and I know that now.

But I still feel like I failed. Anybody else give up so early?

I quit after 2-ish weeks, pumped for a few days, and then went promptly to formula full time.  I still feel guilty sometimes, but the good news is that time heals all.  I feel a lot less guilty, a lot less often these days.

Sweet little Rose is going to be much happier and much healthier if her mommy is happy and healthy.  You did a great job this last week, and I know you tried your hardest, but it's ok to admit when it gets to be too much.  Plus, there are so many great things about formula feeding!  For one, she'll probably sleep longer and go longer between feedings at an earlier age.  I think Addie went to a four hour feeding schedule almost immediately after switching to formula.  Extra sleep makes all the difference!  Not only that, but you can share the bonding time (and nighttime responsibilities) with your husband.  You can have more free time and pass Rose off to your husband if it gets too overwhelming without worrying about her getting hungry again in an hour or two.  Plus you don't have to worry about leaking breasts, pumping if you're away from her too long, cracked/bleeding nipples, complications like clogged ducts and mastitis, etc...  Formula feeding is not all bad!  There's a lot of pluses to it.

Hugs, momma.  You'll get through this.  In the end, you have to make the decision that is right for you and your family.  Formula feeding does not mean you failed and it does not make you a bad mommy.  

Its okay that you decided to stop! It will be better bonding time if you are not in pain. Just lovingly hold him while feeding time is happening (with a bottle.) I know it seems like you just gave up, but IMO all in all you just did what was best in your situation! I didnt breast feed long either. My son didnt latch on no matter what or how many specialists we saw. So feedings took forever it felt like because I was pumping and pumping and then feeding etc. But apparently my milk didnt have enough calories (didnt know that could happen) and he wasnt gaining enough weight so his pediatricion put him on formula and everyones lives got a lot easier from their. I know some are against formula but it all has to meet certain healthy guidlines for baby!! good for you!! but I know that can be a tough start to motherhood. 

Thanks for all your support ladies! The more we bottle feed, the more I feel like we're making the right decision. I got some good sleep last night (well, good compared to the past week of no sleep) and a good nap today! I feel like I'm a much better mom now that I'm less stressed and well rested!

I do still feel guilty about the money we spent trying to breastfeed. We had to rent a pump and buy special bottles, which added up to $100. We're low on money right now (just bought a house and had a baby), so I hate just throwing that money away. My husband says he doesn't care, we had no way of knowing b/c we're new parents and we just have to try things to see if they work.

Can you sell those special bottles back?  Or maybe sell them on Craigslist?  Formula feeding can also be expensive, but I've found that all the big name formula companies (Similac, Enfamil, Gerber, etc...) allow you to sign up for coupons and "formula checks" on their websites.  Definitely check it out, when you get the time! 

@Mrs. Spring: Thanks, that's a good idea! Luckily my mom just took my husband on a Costco shopping trip... so she bought us lots of formula! We won't have to worry about that for a while now.

@GreenEyedMoon: Well, my baby girl tricked me into thinking breastfeeding would be easy from the start. She latched on right away after she was born, and all was good. She lost some weight in the hospital, but that's normal in the beginning, so they sent us home and said all was good. Our first night home was crazy! She was up all night screaming her little head off. I would feed her for 2 hours straight, then she'd scream and make her "I'm hungry" face (smacking her lips together, sticking out her tongue, routing around, etc). So I'd try to feed her again, and she'd suck away for hours and then scream. We assumed she wasn't getting enough food and went to the doctors in the morning to figure out what to do. He said to suppliment with formula until my milk comes in, so we started that. I nursed her and then would give her formula every time. Even then, she decided it was so easy to use the bottle that she didn't want to nurse anymore, even though my milk had finally come in. So we called the lactation con. She told me to pump to keep my milk supply up, and gave us lots of tips and tricks (try to nurse first but don't fight it if she doesn't want to, then have my husband feed her from breastflow bottles while I pump). It took less than a day for her to be back to nursing. But after all of this my nipples were already rubbed raw. My boobs constantly hurt (and to make it worse my who-ha still hurts from a tear when she was born so everything hurts!). Bleeding is pretty normal with breastfeeding in the beginning I've heard, but still scary. I tried lanolin (cream to help with soreness), nipple shield, etc, but nothing would make them feel better and I couldn't handle it anymore. I talked to friends who are breastfeeding and they all said it takes weeks for your nipples to toughen up, and I couldn't imagine going another day like that.