- 5 years ago
Regular member, going anonymous for this one. Sorry bees, this is going to be long. I’ll start off from the beginning so you’ll get a better understanding of my situation. I moved to Europe (France) from the US when I was 17 to start college here. About a year later, my mom and brother came, too. One day, one of my mom’s friends visited us with her son who just moved here from Germany. We became close friends, and soon started dating. The sad part is, I never really felt in love with him. I just liked his presence (he was my best friend).
A year passed…2 years passed, and our families already assumed we were to get married. I never felt in love, but we were best friends and I really felt attached. He was super-attentive towards me and my family members. Everyone kept telling me what a great guy he is and how rare people like him are…He wanted to get married from the start but I never said yes because something inside me kept me back. I never felt those butterflies my friends felt when meeting their SOs. I didn’t really miss him when we were apart, all I knew was that our friendship was too much to lose and we were also um sexually compatible so I just kept being with him. Now this is the part that I want to mention he did EVERYTHING to try to win my heart. Showered me with love and attention, flowers every single day…everything a girl could ask for.
Needless to say, we got married this year. Everything was fine for a week or so (I know…what’s a week). Then, slowly I realized he got into this stupid habit of bookmaking. Is that what it’s called? Basically he put money every single day on sport teams. He was on the computer 24/7 making bets. OMG, I was so annoyed…I tried to talk to him, he didn’t understand. Kept saying he’s just doing it for fun and it’ll never get too far. Well, he was on it every single day and plus he became so secretive, it really hurt me. He would go to the bathroom to take calls. I knew he was not cheating on me though, because he loves me too much.
Yesterday, his mom came to our house. We were alone and she asked me what one of our guests (her relative) gave me on our wedding day. I went to open our safe to show her the gold necklace with earrings…and God, I’ve never been so shocked in my whole life. It wasn’t there…so of course I threw a fit and cried my eyes out when he came home, and he went on to tell me that he was embarrassed to ask me for the necklace so he took it without my permission and stored it I’m sorry I forgot the word for it, but he took it to a place where they store it and give money and if you don’t pay every month, they take your gold. My mind is so messed up, I don’t even remember the word. I seriously don’t know what to think. He told me he’s trying to start a “business” so he needed more money that’s why he took the gold but part of me is thinking he lost it to the bookmaking club. I just don’t believe he would do something like that. I went to check his account to see if he still makes bets, and he changed his password. 🙁 It’s not only this…he’s changed so much. Became possesive and doesn’t let me work (thinks he can work for the both of us, but he obviously can’t). I’m just so sad, I don’t know what to do. Why did he try SO hard to win my heart if he was going to be like this? It took me a while to decide to write this post to get it off my chest at least. I don’t think I should have married him. He loves me, but he’s just not the same man anymore. I refuse to take him to USA with me (I’m a citizen, he’s not).
Someone please help me. I don’t want to get divorced, but feel I can’t take anymore. I’m only 22 and in my culture divorce is looked down on. I need prayers…anything. Thank you for reading this long post.