(Closed) I don’t want to do this anymore. :(

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

woah woah woah they asked YOU not to PLAN YOUR wedding?!? are you kidding??

Post # 4
Hostess
18646 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow that’s crazy.  Unfortunately, he is your FI’s brother and he will always be in your life.  I think the four of you need to sit down because you need to work on your relationship.  I think this completely crazy that they didn’t want you to plan your wedding until theirs was over and that their friends talk crap about you and your FI.

Post # 5
Member
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

okay does FBIL know about the cheating? I guess it was??

If so then that’s all on him. I think that you should go so you can support your man. I recently went to a wedding where my “SIL” did not attend and her husband was a groomsmen. It was not my wedding, and the bride and i were on very thin ice, but that made me mad. lol she should have been there for her husband(the groomsmen). I really don’t have much advice beyond that except to be nice to her, just don’t treat her like a piece of glass. She’s family now, so in a way you’re stuck with her lol. 

Maybe you could try to talk to her again and let her know that you weren’t trying to be mean to her or hurt them on purpose?

 

I really think that she might be jealous of you and not wanting to share any spot light.

Post # 6
Member
687 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I would go to the wedding part and just pop into the reception, and then go home or somewhere fun. While FI may be obligated to stay, you are not. Like you, I would not want to go period.

Post # 7
Member
368 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

This woman sounds like a piece of work. I’m sorry but at some point we cannot just block people on facebook to solve our problems. Why would she even say anything to you at all if she didn’t want a response or want to talk it out. Sounds very childish to me and you don’t need that. Your FI is in a tough spot because it is family, but you guys will work it out. Ugh! I’m so sorry you are dealing with this! 

Post # 8
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

First, I am so sorry for all that you’re dealing with.  Does your FBIL know about the cheating? If he doesn’t, does your FI? That seems like an awful situation to go into a marriage with.  It is completely ridiculous that they would even suggest that you not plan your wedding until theirs was over (it sounds like six months between when they asked and now – that’s just insane!) because you’re PLANNING, it’s not like you’re getting married the next day!  Second, I would suck it up and go – at least to the ceremony, and then make an appearance at the reception.  You wouldn’t want to not be there for your future husband and FBIL.  Be happy for them, be the bigger person, and just spend time with the people you enjoy (hopefully the rest of your FI family).  Good luck!

Post # 9
Member
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

UndecidedUGH…You ever watched a movie where after it is over you thought to yourself. WOW…That women showed more class than anyone I have ever seen?  I want the ability to ACT like that. WELL…….This is one of those opportunities. Just because someone else acts like an ASS doesn’t mean you have to take it ON. You go to that wedding and have a great time. BE the one in the family that walks with grace, charm and kindness. (A hard thing to do when you feel like you have been talked about) BUT…trust me! Nothing makes people more confused (when they take the high road) then someone who is walking with class! I say kill em with kindness!

Good luck to you! Who knows! This could be fun! And I’m sure your FI will appreciate not fighting with you about it anymore! Let him know you love him and are going to be by his side with grace!

Post # 10
Member
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I agree with Gotitang.  If you ever want to work things out in the future, then going to the wedding is a good stepping stone. If you don’t go, it seems like you might just be giving her more fuel against you.  Go, be a lady, and be the bigger person.  

I know it will be hard but you might feel better about it when it’s all over.

The topic ‘I don’t want to do this anymore. :(’ is closed to new replies.

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