Post # 1
I need some perspective. I have a close friend who tends to be a little self-centered. This bugs me but normally after each incident I just have to move on. This time, however, I have been upset for days and I don’t know if I should and if I have the right to be, what do I do about it?
Fiance and I had a couples’ shower last weekend. It was a casual thing with guys and girls and beer and stuff. We did not have an engagement party so this was kind of a combo of a shower and engagement party. There was a time when all the girls gathered to have our picture taken and when I made my way to the spot, my pregnant friend was already in the center and at the front of the group with another friend craddling her belly and her best friend on the other side. The picture is cute, it just looks like a picture that’s celebrating her at her baby shower or something.
Maybe I’m being petty, and if I am, I don’t mind being told so. I just feel sad that it’s something I can’t get back and all I see when I look at the picture is a feeling of being robbed 🙁
Post # 3
- Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas
I think you are really overreacting if all the girl did was take that photo.
Post # 4
@Ari214: I understand how you feel but I think you’re being a little oversensitive. Your friend(s) probably shouldn’t have done that, but you can’t change it so it is what it is.
Post # 5
you should have moved your way to the center of the group for the photo.
Post # 6
@ajillity81: I should have. I was just kinda in shock. And I know it sounds silly and I guess I should quit dwelling on it. I think because of the other things she’s done or said that it makes this a bigger deal than it should be.
Post # 7
- Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley
@Ari214: I get it. I’ve never been one to stick up for myself. If that happened at a party that was thrown for me, I probably still wouldn’t have thrown myself into the middle. I sometimes expect that people should want to do things like that on their own – that they would want to have me in the middle of the picture taken at a party thrown for me (assuming that’s what this was). But they don’t. And I end up feeling really sad about it later. It really comes down to the fact that I need to grow a spine and stop feeling sorry for myself. But I really sympathize.
Post # 8
@Ari214: Im sorry that happened. I can see how you feel that way. I would have asked for another photo.
If she is self centered, she did that on purpose.
Have your MOH tackle her at the wedding if she does that agian LOL
Post # 9
@LMD: Ha! Yes. That’s exactly right. It’s funny because I’m not a quiet or meek person, but I also don’t like being all “me, me, me”. But it would be nice to have been given my place and I just didn’t expect to have to move her or point it out to her that it wasn’t about her this time because it was a party thrown for me.
Post # 10
So here’s a rhetorical question… are you upset because you feel like she nabbed your attention, or are you upset because you didn’t stand up for yourself?
(I tend to ask myself this when I feel the same way you do, and the answer is almost always the latter)
Consider it a lesson learned and understand that there may have been more than one reason for people to be excited at your shower, even if it wasn’t 100% about you. It’s just the way that life goes sometimes.
Next time I vote you call out for another shot and relocate yourself right up in the middle of teh picture. Block the belly if it makes you feel better! 😀
Post # 11
At her baby shower, you should get in the middle of the picture and hold out your hand to show off your ring! Revenge!
Post # 12
I wouldn’t blame her. Here’s why.
I was at a FUNERAL recently, and people kept touching my belly and asking about the baby… IN FRONT OF THE WIDOW. Thankfully, she loves babies and wanted a feel, too!
Because I was DYING inside that people were giving my belly attention instead of the body/widow!
Post # 13
@Ari214: my SIL announced her pregnancy at my engagement party. I have no idea why she chose to do that, but anyone i have told said it was incredibly rude and self centered of her. But she has displayed this behaviour time and time again. So you just have to accept that some people are like that. I have no doubt some of the other guests were wondering what the hell she was doing.
So just smile and move on. People with no tact shoot themselves in the foot eventually. : )
Post # 15
@CakeyP: I am sad and pissed. I am sad that she did that; that as a friend, a close friend, she can’t ever just not think of herself first. And I am pissed that I did not react to it by telling her to move.
Don’t mean to sound snappy but what do you mean “understand that there may have been more than one reason for people to be excited at your shower?” I know I can’t expect people to not care or be happy about her pregnancy, that’s crazy! 🙂 But she is having her own party this Saturday, a shower that I’m hosting and one of two here in the same city. So she’s gonna have plenty of opportunities for people to fawn over her.
Sorry, I’m just really upset. And like I said, it’s hard to convey the depth of my feelings b/c it’s such a long string of little things she’s done along the way that has led to my boiling point! 🙂
Post # 16
@MRSsrm85: Lol. Yes!
Is she typically a self-centered person? If so, this shouldn’t come as a shock. I do think you are being a little too senstive about it, but I also think that was kind of dumb of her to do. It sounds like it was a cute, silly photo, so perhaps the friend that did the belly thing was just trying to fit in for the pic.
I woud try not to let it bother me.