Angry at my dad about the venue – VENT!

posted 3 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I hope that the agreement wasn’t in writing? I would suggest calling that venue directly and tell them that your dad misunderstood what you wanted to pay for just the catering.  I know that’s going behind your dad but if you try some more reasoning and he doesn’t give, then what can you do?  He will be hurt but get over it.  Another option is to just find another catering place and you deal with them directly.

Post # 5
Member
10986 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

Well, even if it is possible to break the contract for a small fee, your father is the one who signed the contract, and he is the one who will be paying all of these expenses, correct?  If that is the case, I would let it go.  Only he can decide what he’s comfortable doing in terms of re-negotiating the original contract. Perhaps a colleague of his has an ownership interest in the original property and he does not want to take business away from him.

Post # 7
Member
10986 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@eocenia:  Aww. 🙁

Well, I’m sorry you and your FI, your mother, and even your grandmother are all being affected by a decision that your dad really was never authorized to make in the first place.

If you’re able to help convince him not to pay more than he has to, that obviously would be best.  However, if you cannot, I would try to let it go so that you don’t end up focusing on these frustrating factors instead of the joy of your wedding.

Post # 9
Member
1631 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@eocenia:  if this isnt a rock and a hard place then I dont knwo what is. Eek.

I think your hardest choice will be if you take mattes into your own hands or just let him overpay. Have you presented these two choices to your mother? She might knwo the best way to handle them.

So sorry to hear that you have to go through this though. Keep your chin up – there is a light at the end of the tunnel somewhere along the line.

Post # 11
Member
1631 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@eocenia:  To be fair – the ‘It’s covered’ statement might be something my own stubborn father would say as well. I think he obviously means well which is what makes this even harder. He is hoping he can get you to see that this area is all set (according to him) so you can focus on other things.

I know you skype with your mom – does he skype? Just wondering how personal the media of communication would be when you brought this up. Maybe also give mom a heads up so she can be there in the background for additional support.

Again, this is no place any bride waants to be, I am so sorry you are dealing with this amount of stress right now 🙁

I hope it will  turn out fine – you’ll have to give an updaate when its all set – either way it turns out.

Post # 13
Member
11379 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@eocenia:  i would contact the venue myself.  your father should not have booked this venue without consulting you anyways.  honestly, if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.

i have a feeling that your father is pushing this issue aside simply because he doen’t want to face the fact that he was in the wrong.  a lot of stubborn people will spend twice as much instead of swallowing their pride.  perfect example.

seriously, take over the reigns.  have your mother do your legwork if necessary.  be firm with the venue, take control and get this sorted out.

Post # 15
Member
11379 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@eocenia:  good luck.  keep us updated.

fwiw, i planned my entire wedding from another country and didn’t have any issues.  i booked everything all on my own.  i kept in contact with all vendors via email/phone. 

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