I Feel Like Crap

posted 1 week ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
4408 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

But…it hurts you.  You can’t tell that in a store for 5 minutes.  I know it’s one that you both liked, but after sleeping on it, it is affecting you and won’t work for you.  Do you have Sleep Number stores near you?  They have two different sides so you can adjust accordingly, and each side can be catered to each person’s needs.

Post # 3
Member
2911 posts
Sugar bee

Get a memory foam pad and soften it up a bit if you don’t want to return it. He will get over it. Ultimately, he wants you to be comfortable.

Post # 4
Member
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Does he not want you to sleep with him for the rest of his life?

Post # 5
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

Can you not just use your mattress when you move in together (how long will that be)? How often do you stay with him?

Post # 7
Member
78 posts
Worker bee

Bee you’re being a bit ridiculous here. Your needs are valid. A good night sleep that doesn’t give you back pain is worth way more than a bit of hassle.

i can’t believe any guy would rather his fiancé/wife be uncomfortable nightly to prevent him from some work. Then actually withholding love because your body hurts is a jerk move. 

Post # 8
Member
2268 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

What bed are you planning on getting? Because while I totally understand your need for comfort when you sleep, your FI  may be imagining going through this mattress swap multiple times because as you said, you can’t tell in a 5 minute lay down. So he may be worried that he’ll go ahead and return it, get a new one,  and you won’t like that either

Post # 9
Member
6372 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

He needs to return the mattress. It’s that simple. Yes, it’s annoying and it’s a hassle but it’s a temporary one and very minor in comparison to you continuing to have back pain for years until it’s time to get a new mattress. It’s sounds like there is a good return policy so he won’t be out any money. 

Post # 10
Member
2516 posts
Sugar bee

Um if it’s guaranteed what’s the big deal, he can exchange it. It’s not like you didn’t like the color, you have legit back problems. I don’t get it. Sure it’s a pain in the butt but these things happen. Plus I don’t know about you, I can’t make myself at home on those filthy store matressess 

Post # 11
Member
31 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: February 2018

We spent a lot on a new bed about 18 months ago. Two weeks in I thought I would have to return it, it was horrendous, neither of us had slept a wink. The sales man said if you are not used to a supportive mattress (our new one was a special chiro one with lots of innersprings etc) its going to take a month to settle. I could have killed the salesman as it was non refundable and I walked out very miffed. A month after we were used to it and no the bed is great. That being said, if I could have ditched it after the first two weeks you bet I would have! Hang in there, its likely to improve.

Post # 12
Member
106 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

We bought a new mattress after moving in together because DH’s one was horrendous – I was horrified in the beginning because of how firm it was. The first two weeks were like sleeping on the floor, but eventually it softened up and now it’s perfect for us! 

If you are really struggling, then by all means find a mattress that is more suitable, but give it a chance, because I know some mattresses take a little time to get used to. 

Post # 13
Member
24 posts
Newbee

Quick question, since the mattress seems to be based on your needs and is for both of you, how come you’re not helping to pay for it? I only ask because you mentioned “he” spent a lot of money on the mattress. I’m guessing since he paid, he’s the one with the exchanging rights.

Or get the reciept from him and exchange it yourself.

He’s being rude, but I can understand his frustrations. Kind of. You have a legitimate reason to want to exchange it and you have that right. He should just suck it up and put it in the car and you could always take it from there. I’m sure a sales associate would help you take the mattress from the parkinglot and then put the new one in.

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