- 8 years ago
- Wedding: October 2004
Hi all, This post is really just everything thats going on in my life. I don’t know if i can deal with it all and I am needing some pick me ups.
Issue #1: I am a senior in college at the moment. Majoring in Psychology I amscheduled to graduate 2 weeks before we get married on August 21st. so, yay! Right?!.. wrong. At this point there is a VERY good chance that I will not be able to graduate in August due to class availability in the summer where i am supposed to take 3 psych classes but only 2 are being offered 🙁 WELL, heres the deal with this. I am in Alabama, and Fiance JUST started his new job this month in Florida. So, If I don’t graduate in august I will have to continue school here in Alabama and graduate in Decemeber. How will this affect the wedding?? well, at the time of the wedding (august 21st) classes will have obviously started, this wont affect the wedding since it is on the weekend, but it will affect a Honeymoon. SO our options are move the wedding back to Decemberish (LEAST fave idea) move the wedding up take our honeymoon then i stay in alabama fro 5 months while hes in Florida, BUT we are married. OR we could get married on our original day and puch the Honeymoon back to December and then I live in bama for 5 months without him. Advice is needed has anyone ever heard of a husband and wife spending there first 5 months of marriage apart because of something they cannot control. do you think this is bad? ok? i just dont know, im torn, and freaking out and although my Fiance had been SO supportive I know he just wants to have a normal marriage where we get married, ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after, but i just dont know if this is an option. And what sucks is that it is very important to us that we are both graduated, so postponing graduation for a while really isnt an option… so help, please 🙁
ISSUE #2: The wedding is SO stressful.. It is just another added stress on my mind while trying to deal with school. This SHOULD be the happiest time of my life but i find myself crying most nights and feeling like im gonna breakdown. I dont want to look back on this year of my engagement and have horrible memories. we are getting marriend in Atlanta where everything is 10 times more expensive that most places so money is a problem for my family to come up with, Last weekend we went to meet with the reception venue to start planning and found out that they had DOUBLE booked us! FURIOUS! so, we ended up having to move our wedding up an hour to accomodate the other wedding ugh dont even get me started on that, and my dad is barely contributing and to TOP all this off I cant even have my wonderful Fiance here to console me. Sometimes I just need a hug from him and as bad as I can want/need it i cant have it. At this point, (because he lives in Florida) we will see each other maybe 6 times before me get married. Which is awful, and it sucks, i thought I would be fine, but i also didnt think i would feel like breaking down from EVERYHTING going wrong. This is kinda more of a rant on this issue, but its hard planning a wedding, and i honestly dont even enjoy it anymore. We aren’t having fun 🙁
ISSUE #3: The biggest issue. Is anyone else scared to death of the divorce rate?? I am a complete realist which is sometimes a bad thing. Its very hard for me to look on the good side because all of the BAD sides. Anyways, the divorce rate is nearly 50% of all marriages will end in divorce. now I know everyone wants to say oh we will be toegther forever and happy but i cant ignore the stats AND just to add a little more I will be 22 when we get married and couples who get married young have an either higher divorce rate. I PERSONALLY do feel like Fi and I are perfect I expect to have bumps in the road, I know it will be work, but that is something im willing to face. Coming from divroced parents I KNOW what i want out of a marriage and divorce is NOT an option for me. BUT what scares me is no one PLANS to fall out of love or have something awful happen that rips you apart, I cont see the future, and its scary. I don’t want to be a statistic and I am taking marriage SO seriously, I know it will change my life and that is a scary idea. BUT I love love my amazing Fiance. I could not have asked for a better person. When we entered into our relationship we layed it all out on the table what we wanted, didnt want, liked, and expected from this relationship. He has been there for me as much as possible considering hes 400 miles away and I could not be more thankful.
SO, I guess where i am going with this awfully long post (sorry about that) is that im a pessimist/realist and the ONLY person who can calm me down is Fiance and hes not here. I just need some help getting through all this and I feel like this is my most diverse group to get advice from. SO thanks Bees for letting me say my peice. I really appreciate it.