Post # 1
I’ve near recently got engaged(November) and I’m so happy to be getting married to someone I love with all my heart. The venue is booked and other plans are starting to form. Our date for the wedding is this November.
The thing is before getting engaged the thought of getting married filled me with so much excitement. I could spend hours a day day dreaming about planning, doing and being a wife and now I’m engaged I feel, emotionally flat.
I know why my excitement has dimmed, it’s because most of my friends are single and are verbally unhappy about this. I’m the first one in the group to be getting married and I feel like it SO rude to be rubbing my happiness in their face. I don’t like talking about the wedding and only do so when someone else brings it up, evne then I talk about it for 5 mins and then change the subject. I’m starting to sound like I don’t like weddings!
I’m not very good at being “selfish” I would always rather do things for others and find it hard to accept help from others when they offer it, so it’s something in my general nature, not necessarily just to do with weddings.
Can anyone offer up a way of dealing with this so I don’t completely ruin my chance to enjoy what should be a really exciting time in my life?
Post # 3
Your friends should be excited and happy for you – if they aren’t, then honestly? They aren’t worth being friends with. I know that sounds harsh, but it’s ridiculous to make someone feel bad for being happy or having exciting things happen to them. It is weird being the first one in a group of friends to do something life-changing, be it marriage, having children or even going to college. I understand that you don’t want to “rub it in”, but you honestly aren’t! Rubbing it in would be talking about your wedding 24/7 and looking for excuses to bring it up. Which I know you aren’t doing, because like me you don’t relish being the center of attention. Try to relax and realize that this is a time to be happy, excited and bask in the glow of your engagement. It’s a major milestone in life and you will have plenty of years down the road to be excited for them!
Think of it this way: say it was one of your friends who got engaged first, rather than you. Would you be happy for her? Of course you would! So trust that your friends are happy for you. And if not, then like I said… I’d consider finding new friends who don’t need everyone around them to be equally unhappy.
If you find many don’t want to talk about your wedding, then you can always just spend your time on Wedding Bee 🙂 I know that I come here a lot so I don’t overdo my wedding talk with friends and family.
Post # 4
- Wedding: April 2012 - St. Philip Catholic Church/Arcadia Brewing Co.
I agree with jocember, I applied to be a blogger here so my bridesmaids would get a break (a few weeks after I asked them I realized I was more or less “blogging” to them (via e-mail) about all the planning).
On top of that, when you are in the pre-gagement phase, there are infinite possibilities and countless styles or looks your wedding could have. However once you start planning in real life, things get narrowed down pretty quickly. I found that took some of the “any thing is possible” excitement out of it, but as more and more details come together and you are able to imagine your actual wedding, the excitement comes back!
I too am the first of my friends so I try to monitor my rambling about the wedding but honestly they expect that so don’t feel too bad! They might not even want to get married right now!
Good luck! Hope you find the thrill agian! 🙂