I feel weird depositing wedding checks right away…

posted 3 years ago in Money
Post # 3
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 1988

As long as you write a thank you note right away, I see no problem with depositing the checks.

Best Wishes!

Post # 4
774 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@skippydarling:  I wouldn’t be personally offended by that if I were your guest. Just send a thank-you note soon (I’ve gone to weddings where I didn’t receive thank you notes- those brides are on the bad list forever). Usually if I get a check as a gift I deposit it quickly so I don’t lose it. 

Post # 5
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I wouldn’t be upset!

Post # 6
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@skippydarling:  I’d rather have my account balanced than a surprise charge a few months later.  I doubt most people would even notice exactly when you cashed the check.  Plus, if you’re getting the checks in the mail, they probably don’t even know the delay between you receiving the check and cashing it. 

I might find it a little weird if I noticed you had cashed all your checks on your wedding night, because I would have assumed you’d have something better to do if you were so bored 🙂

Post # 7
689 posts
Busy bee

I would rather you deposit it right away as someone who often writes checks instead of putting cash in envelopes as gifts. I can’t stand it when pple take 2 months to cash checks. It literally stresses me out bc I’m thinking either A) the card got stolen at the hall B)They lost the check C)Something is wrong with the check D)They forgot and therefore I will forget and then overdraw my account or something.


Please do us neurotics a favor and deposit it asap!

Post # 8
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@skippydarling:  haha– i felt really weird depositing checks immediately– BUT we got married on Saturday, and then the following Thursday I went to bowling league with my husband.  All the guys in the league were at our wedding- and gave is checks!  They were all like “cash it!”– I think in general, people like it when a check they write clears the bank sooner rather than later– so don’t feel bad about it!  Get er done!

Post # 9
457 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Actually, I’ve been told that depositing the money right away is the proper thing to do. Not everyone keeps good track of their budget, so someone might write a check and then possibly forget or not account for it properly later on, causing problems if you try to cash it later. Or, so that was the reasoning told to me.

I know that, personally, I feel uncomfortable if someone sits on a check. I’ve already accounted for it in my budget by the time I write it, but I don’t like seeing the money still in there.

Nine days before the wedding isn’t extraordinarily early. Just make sure to write your thank-you notes ASAP. 🙂

Post # 11
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

We saved them all up and deposited them right after the wedding. I think that’s what you’re “supposed to do” in case the wedding is delayed or canceled for some reason. I really don’t think anyone (except for my family) cares though! 

Post # 12
5160 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@skippydarling:  I didn’t deposit cheques until I’d put the thank you note in the mail and given it a couple of days to arrive.

I didn’t want people to think that I had time to deposit the cheque but no time yet to write a than you for their generous gift.

This also helped to get me motivated to get my thank yous done quickly! 😀

Post # 13
2741 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@skippydarling:  We’ve only gotten one check so far and it was from my FI’s great aunt, and FMIL actually called me and told me to deposit it right away because she didn’t want her check out there undeposited. A couple days later we were having dinner with some friends and I mentioned that his mom said to deposit it right away and one of my friends said his grandfather was the same way. He said it messed up his bank balance to have uncashed checks out there, which I guess makes sense. Moral of the story – I think older people in particular will appreciate you depositing them right away.

And even if it was a check from a younger person, it’s a gift for you guys! I seriously doubt they’re thinking you guys are desperate for cash by depositing them so quickly. That would be the last thing I would think.

Post # 14
825 posts
Busy bee

I’d much prefer that than the alternative. The WORST thing in the world is thinking someone cashed the check and then signing in to a completely different number than you expected. I can’t stand it when people hang onto checks for weeks at a time.

Post # 15
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If I write someone a check I want them to cash it sooner rather than later. I say cash them, especially since you are writing Ty’s right away. Theres not an proper “grace period”. 

Post # 16
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I see nothing wrong with it.  We deposited checks as we got them, with a phone app.  We even had one “can’t attend” who sent a check we deposited before the wedding.

If they are managing their money properly once they write the check the money is gone in their mind, and it’s just a matter of the bank reflecting that so the sooner the better.

Especially since you’re sending Thank You cards out ASAP I wouldn’t even worry about it.

I’d be mildly frustrated if you waited to cash the check :).  I want my spreadsheet numbers to match the bank numbers!  There’s a column for “cleared the bank” basically… and old stuff drives me crazy!

As a person who occasionally still writes checks (mostly just for bulk bus passes)… it’s like “cash the thing already so I can check it off on my spreadsheet”!  Even when writing checks for everything was the norm it would annoy me to no end when some person/business wouldn’t cash a check for weeks/months.  I would feel “I gave you the money!” what are you waiting for!

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