Ok, if I read this right (OP you might want to confirm, cause it looks like I am not the only Bee who is confused about the facts)
You two were dating.
You broke up for aprox 8 months (for whatever reason)
During THAT TIMEFRAME he began dating her. He says it was for aprox 3 months, and he never slept with her. Altho they did go to Florida together on vacation, which you have since found out about (photos, videos).
Then you two work on getting back together (he is still seeing her, but doesn’t tell you)
Then you two do get back together.
And ONLY NOW you discover that once you two were back together he at one point did see her “I thought we were supposed to see each other today?”… which was a planned meet up with her, although he was seeing you.
(Not totally clear WHERE the quoted statement comes from… is it something you said, she said, a text ?)
But anyhow that is the crux of your problem.
Three Years later, you and him are still together and you discover that he was actually for awhile in your getting back together early days… still seeing her (or at least one time)
Right… Did I understand all that, and get the details right ??
— — —
If so, ya it sucks he lied to you, twisted the truth. He may have done so because he wanted so desperately to get back together with you (afterall it sounds like the 8 month break up was your idea and not his… altho you haven’t told us WHY you guys broke up to begin with… that may or may not shed some light on this issue)
IF you broke up with him, chances are he didn’t want to p!ss you off / risk not reconciling with you if you were open to it… by telling you he was seeing someone else in the interim
8 Months is a long time… and by all accounts you guys were over and done with. So he had every right to move on with his social life (truly the healthy thing to do). You cannot hold THAT against him. Whether he saw her for 1 day, 3 months, or 7 months and 29 Days… that is HIS BUSINESS and not yours.
So you need to FORGET the whole Florida thing… which seems to bother you the most here in your post (probably because there is “evidence” of his being happy with her in pictures / video…). In reality the guy didn’t have to be a MONK / SAINT just cause you weren’t in the picture any longer (pun intended). YOU WERE GONE. Period. He had every right to enjoy his life and be happy.
Now if he met up with her after you two got back together… whole other issue. To finally break it off in person… (ie early days) then that would be OK. 2 or 3 months down the road for a rendez-vous… Ummm, NO NOT OK
Getting together then would for me at least… would be out-of-bounds. But then I am very clear in my relationships about boundaries. My men (man) doesn’t have one-on-one meet-ups / friendships with other women … and certainly not Exes.
So ya, that might consitute in the very least… EMOTIONAL CHEATING in my book.
ONLY HE can tell you what went down in those days when the two of you were back together and he was meeting up with her
All that aside,
It has been 3 years now. Unless he is still seeing her in some way, I cannot see where this needs to be such a HUGE issue in your life any more. He is with you now… either as your SO, Fiance or Husband.
Sooo, unless he is fooling around on the side, I don’t think there is any element here for not trusting him…
You need to let this all go, it will be the best for you, him, and the relationship that you have together
(( HUGS ))
I hope this helps,