- 5 years ago
I hate to sound like a typical girl, but it’s true-I absolutely despise my BFF’s friend. We’re all supposed to hang out this upcoming weekend, and I’m already dreading it. But I don’t know what to do about it.
To put it in a nutshell, my friend’s friend is loud, rude, spoiled, and embarrasses not only herself, but us whenever we go out drinking. I’ve tried talking to her & hanging out with her outside a bar setting, but we can never agree or relate to anything. So we’ve all just hung out together, even though everytime I get upset after.
When I’m with my BFF, we have a lot of fun. She introduced me to this girl a few years ago, and we got along for a while, but then her attitude began to grate on me, and I hated the fact that she would trash-talk my friend behind her back, and other things that didn’t really make her friend worthy. So I started to avoid her, and she did the same. If my friend wanted us to get together for a movie night, then I would agree and go to it, make small talk with the other girl, but I was always glad when we would go out on our own and she wouldn’t be able to come.
I am almost 30, and both of these girls are 5 years younger than me. They are best friends, so when we all go out together sometimes they do their own thing and I feel like a third wheel, which has been happening more and more lately. My BFF just had a baby and is excited to get out the few times she can, and I try to be excited too since I don’t get out much either, but when I see that her friend is there or hears that she’s coming, my night is already ruined. I try to have fun on my own, especially if my fiance comes along, but I can never get any “alone BFF time” like the other two do. They won’t talk to me and they create FB albums with me in only a couple of the pictures. My fiance says I should say something to my friend, because it’s toxic behavior, but I honestly am scared about bringing it up. I’m worried that she won’t easily see this other girl’s faults as I do, or come to her defense. I’m not saying she can’t have other friends, because she does, but I just don’t like the way this girl has treated her in the past and how she’s toxic to her overall. I know as a friend, I should voice my concerns, but then again I’m worried about her brushing it off or making excuses for her.
Should I just suck it up and just enjoy any future nights out with her? My friend and I have had nights out with our guys, without the other girl, but lately she’s been popping up everywhere we go
Also, it’s not like this girl is the only friend I have. I am close friends with other girls my age, but we don’t share the history & connection that this other girl and I have. People have told me to go out and “Look for a new best friend” but it isn’t easy at all to just suddenly find a new friend
Sigh. This is what I hate about being a girl. I wish friendships were as easy as they were in grade school