Weddingbee boards

Argh, the most frusterating thing happened last weekend and I thought I'd give myself a few days to cool off but I really need to vent this out.  Sorry it's long. 

So my FI and I share a group of friends and we've all been friends for about 7 years now.  One of the girls in the group (let's call her Amy) use to have/still seems to have a thing for FI.  So about 2 years before FI and I started dating, she confessed her feelings to him and he turned her down.   Even though he turned her down they were still friends and shortly after that Amy and I ended up becoming really good friends.  We hung out every weekend and talked to each other all the time that is until when FI and I started dating (about 3 years after she had confessed her feelings to him and about a year after we started becoming best friends), she was not happy at all about it.  Let's just say very hurtful things were said (almost all on her part actually).  She even went as far to call her friendship with me a complete lie and that she was just pretending to be my friend because that's what she thought FI wanted her to do....  We ended up not talking for about a year after that.

Recently, she started renting a room with another really close friend in the group (let's call him Tom).  Our group hangs out at Tom's place a lot and since she use to be friends with everyone in our group, we've started inviting her to outings even when we're not going to Tom's place.  I've been working on my issues with her and I thought things were going to be ok again until....

Last Saturday we were all at FI's and my place and trying to order carry out from a Chinese menu.  One of my friends suggested Egg Foo Young, I've never had it before.  Both Amy and I were holding the menu.  So before looking down at the menu, I asked Amy what section would that fall under, only to look down and see that it had it's own section.  Before I could say anything, Amy starts calling me (very loudly) stupid and asking me how I can even do my job, make any money and how I even earned my college degree being so stupid...  She then proceeded to repeat all these words at least 5-6 more times (totally not exhagerating) until FI finally yelled loudly enough over her voice to tell her to stop... 

I'm just so frusterated with this girl now.  This whole thing makes me dislike and distrust her even more than before.  I don't want to cause any drama with my friends, especially for Tom who's living with her (he's such a good friend).  But honestly, I have never said anything mean to her, and she thinks she can say anything she wants to me.  I'm also so mad at myself for not fighting back harder, I'm so sick of her thinking that she can say anything to me and get away with it. And I felt like I didn't do enough on Saturday to prove to her that she can't treat me like that...

At this point I'm not sure how to handle this since she's more than likely going to be invited to other group parties and outings since we share the same friends.  I get so frustrated everytime I think about it (>_<).  

Anyone ever go through a similar situation where you had to be "friends" with someone you didn't like because they were in the same group as you?

Thanks girls for all the supprt.  I really appreciate it.  She is definitely not going to be invited to the wedding.  Unfortunately completely avoiding her will probably not be possible since chances are we'll be invited to the same social functions from time to time, but I will take your advice and just be polite and ignore her. 

@ LuvMySailor You're right, she is a toxic friend. I'll be sure to not talk about any wedding planning around her. 

@ jcooper10 You are 100% correct, this is probably the path I will have to take.

@ sexxysheddy FI and I talked about this and you're right, he is really sick of this BS as well.  I think he felt really bad for her before but after last weekend, what she did really crossed the line for him.

@Juliepants Thanks for the advice on what to say next time she says something rude.  I will definitely keep that in mind. 

@ MrsNeutrino LOL I think your comment made my day :)

@ Au Jardin Thanks for reminding me to take the high road.  It's so hard sometimes and can be extremely frusterating, but you're right.  In the end, she's the one who looks bad.

Thank you everyone for all your comments :)  You girls really make me feel a lot better. 

Thanks again everyone.  You all make me feel so much better.  Everyone is right, she has to be jealous, there's no other reason why she would've been so mean after such a small mistake.  It's amazing though that she can still be caught up with my FI and this jealous after all this time.  I mean it's been 6 YEARS since she confessed her feelings to him and he rejected her...  I've already told a few of my closer friends in the group and they agreed she was completely out of line. 

She's normally pretty rude to everyone and not just me so those comments she said to me weren't out of character, but the amount ot times she repeated them was definitely out of the norm.  But after hearing all your comments, regardless of how many times she said those things to me, it was rude and completely unnecessary.  One time when we went to the Six Flags Halloween Fright Fest a few months ago, she latched on to one of my guy friends in the group and pulled on on to his hood the entire night because he was her "meat shield" and "guard dog" for the evening.  She's not a favorite in the group, but I think all the the guys just put up with her because she's small and cute and constantly says things like how she doesn't have any friends so they feel sorry for her. Needless to say, they probably won't miss her if she's not invited to as many things from now on. 

Thanks again for all the advice!

she doesnt need to be in your life..i cant do it like you and still hang out with her lol..definately shes a bye bye :)