(Closed) I hate my friends

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2237 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Has it always been this way or is it a recent change?  I find it hard to believe/weird if they just RANDOMLY started acting like this…But if you don’t like the way they’re treating you, talk to them about it, and if things don’t change, then move on!

Post # 5
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Where are you? I’ll be your friend!

I’m sorry to hear about your birthday weekend, that was really mean and selfish of them. I agree with you that they probably don’t have good intentions when it comes to your friendship and don’t really deserve to have you chipping in $ at this point.

I also don’t do well with cliques. I’ve lost several friends because of this. I refuse to take part in them and if I feel like I’m being shunned by one I’ll usually just stop calling them or participating in any social events. Girls are really bad about being cliquey which is why I’m down so many friends over the years. At this point inmy life, I am happy to say that I was a 5 BM bride, two of which were sisters and the remaining three were good friends who always call on my Bday and wouldn’t dream of doing anythign to hurt my feelings. My group of girlfirends are mature, respectful, considerate and a lot of fun.

Post # 6
Member
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I often get that feeling too, with most women in fact. I only have three females I consider friends although I have a ton of female acquaintaces. I mostly hung out with boys growing up and I still tend to be more comfortable with men then women. Now that I attend parties at his friends, I try very hard to be sociable with the other wives, but I find I can only stand about 1 hour before my patience gives out and I end up sitting somewhere by myself. I can not stand endless prattling about trival BS.

Post # 7
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’m sorry that you feel this way.  Honestly, this is why I only have a few very close friends.  It’s hard to feel like the odd person out.  If you don’t feel you are being valued as a friend, perhaps you can talk to them about it, or you can go ahead and distance yourself from them. 

Post # 8
Member
990 posts
Busy bee

i’m sorry you feel this way. i felt like this with a few of my friends that i’ve known since high school. you sound like you’re a person like me, you keep a very close circle of friends and when things go awry it feels serious. ignore them, and call up a girlfriend you havent talked to in a while. once you start bonding with others, they will miss you and try to be better friends…if you’ll want them around by then.

Post # 9
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

That’s not very cool for them to act like that and for you to feel like this. I am very lucky and I have the best friends, and most of my friends have been my friends for years. Trust me when you find your girls they are your girls and will never make you feel that way. I’m not saying you don’t go through ups and downs, but you true friends don’t make you feel like that.

Post # 10
Member
1545 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

i have the same feelings about my friends too some time. i think i am really sentisive though. i hate feeling like that but i do feel left out a lot. like even if i have other plans its still nice to invite me. i always invite because its a nice gesture.

Post # 11
Member
1752 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I went thru that phase.  Where you don’t have the same likes and dislikes as your friends anymore, or you feel you have grown up a bit, and they haven’t.

You have to know when you’ve had enough.  Sometimes it’s just best to move on, and keep them as acquaintinances but not as friends anymore.  Sometimes groups will form closer bonds & you won’t be part of that.  If it doesn’t change after a while, branch out, make new friends, and let them go.

Maybe these girls spend a lot more time together than they do with you.  And it sounds like they are still in the partying phase, and you aren’t.  This can break apart friendships, it did for me too.

Good friends never treat you like crap.. remember that.

Post # 13
Member
1752 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I guess I didn’t really take into account that your husband is probably friends with their significant others…  that’s a tough spot to be in.

If you decide that it’s not worth your time to maintain a close relationship with these girls, you can still be cordial with them, still be friendly when you are together, but you don’t have to socialize with them outside of these group settings.

I would say that as much as it’s a pain, you should probably try your hardest NOT to allienate yourself compeletly, as it could cause issues in your relationship.  My mother and father are divorced, and partially for this reason.  My mom and her circle of friends like to travel and party, drink, dance, etc, and my dad never got into it.. it caused a rift between them because my dad started to get bitter about it after a while.

Don’t try to fit in.. try to get along.  Instead of playing beer pong, stand there, watch and cheer for your husband.  Play the drinking games, but don’t play with alcohol.  I drink a LOT of soda water when out with big drinkers, or out camping.  You can enjoy the games w/o the over consumption of alcohol.

Post # 14
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wow, that sounds like they are all very immature and juvenile. I wouldn’t be able to hang out with women who acted that way….guess that’s why I have so many guy friends!

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