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Have you considered having cups sewn into the dress?
My girls are C's and I didn't want to have to worry about a bra showing under the dress so I asked the seamstress to sew cups in. They were suprisingly supportive and very comfortable. If your bodice is tight enough I think the sewn in cups might be what you need.
I second the cups... there are a few variations your seamstress should have (pushup, no pushup, extra support, etc) that can be sewn directly into the dress. They help the dress fit perfectly, and because it is snug, you won't feel unsupported.
I know you mentioned the bustier with foam over the boning but have you tried it with your dress? That's what I went with instead of having cups swen in. The nice thing about a bustier is that it will take the weight of your double Ds off your dress. Otherwise, you're counting on the little spagetti straps and the fit of the bodice to keep you in place. For comfort and appearance, you don't want the straps cutting into your shoulders or back skin/chest bulding from the dress because it's puled tight for support. I felt so much better knowing the bustier was doing all the work to keep me in and lifted rather than relying on the dress to do that.
I am having a similar problem with my dress. It plunges in both the front and back, but not to my butt crack or anything like that. Anyway, I tried having the cups put in and they didn't work. I've tried several bras and they all show when I try them with the dress. I have a similar cup size too, so I can't go without. In short, I don't have a lot of advice for you, but I wanted to let you know that you're not the only one with this problem!
Thanks everyone! I'll keep looking into everything I can. Part of the problem right now is my dress is at the seamstress and I can't even try different things on with it.
Porterhouse, if I figure something out, I will pass it on. It's good to know I'm not alone!
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Some backstory: The girls are big (DDs though one store just told me E - yikes!). I fell in love with and bought a dress that has a very form fitting bodice made out of very light french cotton and lace - it has spaghetti straps and a low cut V (but not scandalously low). I can't do the bustier or longline bra thing because the bones show through the cotton. I think there are foam ones that cover the bone, but that looks weird too underneath the cotton. I've looked at everything including those strapless bodice things and nothing works quite right.
My seamstress recommended a lingerie store to me (I'm in LA, store is Miss Stevens) and made it sound like they would find me what I needed. I don't want to knock the store too much because they are great at fitting and help a lot of women who need prosthetic bras, but they didn't seem to want to help me. The sales woman only showed me 2 things and the one that fit was a strapless bra that had great support but way too much coverage for the dress. When I told her that, she said I had to alter the dress for the bra (um, seriously?) or else I could use a bra with those clear plastic straps (um, tacky!). I know I need support, but I'm willing to sacrifice some support for something that works. My current plan is spanx to smooth the tummy area and a strapless bra that admittedly is a size too small but provides the right amount of coverage for the dress (and at least some support).
Sorry for the long post but is anyone else having this issue or have suggestions? Or did my love of the dress blind my need for support?