Post # 1
So im 8 days out from my wedding, and have been planning for about 8 months now. Hubby and i have been engaged for three years, and through the entire planning process i havent had that ‘This just got real/ im getting married/ im going to be a bride’ moment.
Even on my bachelorette weekend, even when i tried on my dress, even when we tasted out wedding cake, even when we chose our first dance, even when we bought and tried on Hubbys wedding ring, and even when my Maid of Honor bought me two ‘Bride to be’ shirts and a ‘bride’ jumper.
I thought I would have had the moment by now, and im worried that it will come on the morning of the wedding, and i will be a wreck!
I’ve been a relatively calm bride (definitely not a bridezilla) , and haven’t had any huge fights with hubby, or anything out of the normal. But im normally a very emotional person, and can’t understand why it doesnt feel real yet. I tried to explain it to my mum, and the best i could come up with is “I feel like im planning someone elses wedding.”
Has anyone else felt like this? What should i do?
Post # 3
I didnt get that moment until I walked into the room to do our first look. Not when I had my makeup/hair done, not when I put my dress on that day, nothing. It just felt like a normal day in a pretty dress. But as soon as I saw my FI sitting there waiting for me I was like “holy crap!” haha.
Post # 4
@MrsFitness: I felt drunk or numb or like I was floating!
I didn’t really “get it” that I was married until after our reception!
Which was a serious bummer, since I feel like I “floated” through our wedding day! Like I wasn’t really there!
On the bright side, it hit me after we consummated the wedding, so when we went out dancing that night, I got to “feel like a bride”!
Post # 5
@MrsFitness: We are three months out, and I feel relatively the same way as you. It’s all a process for me to plan a wedding. That’s all, just a process. I find it hard to associate any of the tedious details and money spent to the important feelings and deep love that I have for my FI. Even as I bought a dress. It only mattered that I look beautiful for *him*. None of that traditional wedding stuff matters nearly as much to me as me just marrying the love of my life.
Now, that doesn’to mean I’m slacking on the planning. I’m not one to settle for anything half-a**ed. However, I am essentially planning a party that simply allows our loved ones to participate in the one and only thing I *know* will be magical in that moment. Looking at him, saying my vows and probably blubbering like a giant baby. And you can’t replicate those feelings until you’re in *that* moment. So, I will work work work away to make it as fun and beautiful as possible otherwise.
When listening to songs for our walk down the aisle, I shut my eyes and actually envisioned it. That was one time that I got a little choked up. I also went to another friends wedding last weekend and cried during the ceremony, and it made it a littttle more real. I’m trying to really slow down, take in each and every sentimental moment I can… Knowing that this will be the only time that this happens for us.
Post # 6
It’s ok, I think that’s pretty normal.
It didn’t really feel real for me either until the wedding. And heck, we’ve been married for almost 6 months and it still sort of doesn’t feel real! For several months it will probably feel totally strange saying “husband” and “wife.”
It’s ok, just allow yourself to feel how you feel. As you lead up to the wedding and on your day and your honeymoon do your best to be present and remember what it all feels like. It might not be what you expect, but hopefully it’ll be wonderful.
Post # 7
@smv22114: your describing it to me like you ARE me lol. I can envision walking down the aisle, and i get a few tears listening to our song, but yeah Its like a process. its a plan for a big day, down to every detail, and i, like you wont settle for half a**ed.
Post # 8
@MrsFitness: I didn’t have a moment until my dad and I were driving to the church. It was surreal…and I had a full blown panic attack at the alter. Wouldn’t be me if I didn’t haha…
Post # 9
like a PP said, i didn’t have that feeling until i walked into the area we were doing our first look in. everything felt like it wasn’t happening to me yet and i was just going along with the motions.
Post # 10
I was very excited about the wedding, but I didn’t have any “moments” really either. I didn’t cry picking out my dress, getting ready, or even in our first look, but once I walked down the aisle, I could hardly hold back tears! I was more surprised than anyone and I was tearing up the whole ceremony. Don’t worry, it will come and your day will be amazing!