(Closed) I just left FI and going back to my X.

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
46153 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I feel sorry for your FI as he is about to have his heart broken.

Are you sure that your EXis the man you have built up in your memories? People with head injuries can have a drastic change in personality and behavior. I would be very cautious jumping from one relationship to another.

I suggest that if you should consider taking some time to be on your own to re-evaluate your thoughts before you take a quantum leap into the past.

Post # 5
Member
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Are you sure its just not issues from not properly dealing with your breakup with the ex and the lack of closure?

I’m not sure how you could be engaged to marry if you weren’t 100% dead set on being with them for life and also that they are your soulmate.

Maybe seeing nobody for a while would be best until you sort out your life. You may be making some risky and huge misakes!

Thinking of you! Hoping for the best!

Post # 6
Member
5154 posts
Bee Keeper

@Uberprincess:  I think that it is very brave of you to break it off with your FI rather than going behind his back to see your ex. I think you deserve a little credit for that. However, your FI is going to be devastated right now. He is better off being hurt before the marriage than realizing that he married a woman that didn’t consider him the one. Good luck to you. I hope your Ex lives up to your memory of him.

Post # 8
Member
5154 posts
Bee Keeper

I would also like to say that even if you are not sure that your ex is the one.. you are doing the right thing by not leading your FI on any longer. You need to figure this out.. and the best way for everyone would be for you to do it out in the open! 

ETA: how come your ex’s parents never knew about you? How old were you when you two decided to meet in paris and get married? How long were you and your ex together? oh-and how did you meet? all of this might help people get a better view of the situation

Post # 9
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Im actually very proud of you for having the courage to follow your heart! It’s like the notebook.

 

Post # 11
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i wish everyone the best.  your FI for the broken heart he is about to go through, to your ex for his healthy recovery and for you for being honest.  hopefully in time everyone will be happy

Post # 11
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

double post

Post # 12
Member
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I understand you have unresolved feelings for your ex.  It’s amazingly hard when you don’t shut out the “what ifs”. 

I don’t think I’d leave something I consider “perfect” behind for an unknown.  As someone said this sounds like The Notebook.  Life isn’t a movie or fairytale.  I don’t think I’d leave behind a tangible real solid “perfect” relationship for a romantic idea.

Are you sure this isn’t just cold feet?  The “what ifs” can be very tempting when you’re committing to forever.

I wish you the best either way.

Post # 13
Member
210 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think you are very strong and courageous.

But please take a moment to pause. You are at a huge moment and you can not risk making a rash decision. Take a couple weeks away from both of them.

 

Post # 14
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Uberprincess:  I agree with

 1. julies1949 Ensure that this is the same guy you love. Because ppl change, especially with an experience as war/head injuries. Personalities can be altered. I wud be disappointed to hear you think you may have made another mistake by goin bac to the ex realising FI WAS the one. Please think over clearly and don’t rush

 and Mrs.Argentina: Not having closure is a heck of a thing. 

Sweetie: R u sure and willin to live with the consequences?

Post # 15
Member
3001 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Mz Izzie:  I agree with her follow up comments.

 

Simply put- war changes a person. Please think about your decision a while longer before you act on it.

The topic ‘I just left FI and going back to my X.’ is closed to new replies.

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