I just met 'one of those people'….

posted 3 years ago in Reception
  • poll: WWY have said?
    You answered it well. : (37 votes)
    31 %
    Should have just said "No" : (80 votes)
    67 %
    Other? : (3 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    2052 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Whenever I hear people trying to bring kids to a wedding where the couple getting hitched doesn’t want kids, I always worry that they must  not be able to find a sitter.  Maybe it’s a good thing you haven’t decided to invite her yet, perhaps she doesn’t need an invite!

    Post # 4
    3828 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @Mimoza:  honestly, i DONT know why people want to bring their kids. My family got a babysitter and sent the kids home at 9pm which was a good idea. The other baby at my wedding spent the night CRYING because she was tired. I have no idea why they didnt get a babysitter for her or have her grandparents pick her up.  

    Yes i understand loving your kids and all, but at an adult function wouldn’t you rather enjoy yourself instead of telling your kid to eat their foods?

    Post # 6
    5482 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @Mimoza:  I’m sorry but this is my pet peeve. I do not do not do NOT understand why parents think this is ok/socially acceptable. It is NOT socially acceptable to bring your children ANYWHERE they were not specifically invited, be it dinner party, cocktail hour, baby shower, or wedding!

    ARGH!!! I would have flat out said no, but you sound nicer than I am!! 🙂

    Post # 7
    10219 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Etiquette Snob here… lol

    You answered it extremely well… and that is how I VOTED

    The woman is a boor… her manners (lack of them) is deplorable

    And obviously others in the family are quite aware of that

    I’d be really tempted not to send her an invite at all …

    Strictly because of what she’s done in this example…

    Corner You – Ask You – and then basically tell you “too bad so sad… I will do what I want”

    Sounds like no one else in the family would miss her, or blame you.


    Post # 9
    1535 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    @Mimoza:  I think what you said would have been a good first answer, but i would have just straight out said “no” to her response.

    I had a similar thing (not kid related) when FBIL talked about bringing one of his buddies (we’re having a small 50-60 person wedding). I first told him we only wanted to keep it people FI and I are close to. His response was “yeah but he’ll come, it’ll be good” I just said “no he’s not coming”

    Post # 11
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee

    @Mimoza:  I don’t think a person who can tell you face to face that they don’t care about your preference not to have children at your wedding, would understand the subtlety of an invite with only the couple’s names. But, fingers crossed !

    Post # 12
    6685 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I like what you said initially, but after she refused to take the hint and made the comment about the stroller, I think I would have said  you are sorry,  you are not inviting any young children, and that it wouldn’t be fair to other guests with children to make an exception. 

    Post # 13
    5482 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @Mimoza:  Don’t hold your breath on that…………but good for you for being nice and flexible!! Seriously!! 🙂

    Post # 14
    1028 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    @NauticalDisaster:  +1. I was trying to think of a way to phrase this nicely so thank you for posting this.

    Post # 15
    838 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    @Mimoza:  I second@This Time Round:  I wouldn’t invite her. Obviously you don’t know her that well since you just met her for the first time. Maybe it just “slipped your mind” or if she has to be invited I would call her directly after you get back her RSVP and tell her no children are allowed, and you understand if shes not able to attend. Tell her its just not fair to the other guests who have children for her to be allowed to bring hers. 

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