Post # 1
Fiance just put our nonrefundable deposit down on our venue this month and I was so excited and very happy! However something has been in the back of my head for awhile, his first wedding. I had seen pictures of his first wedding and his daughter was in the pictures, I knew she was born in Sept and I could tell she wasn’t but a few months old in the picture which would make their wedding in the Fall. I asked him what his anniversary was and he told me he honestly couldn’t remember. He said it was over 10 years ago and nothing he liked to think about or remember. (His ex is a horrid person) I believed him but it still bugged me. So yesterday I was packing up boxes since we’re moving next month and found a bunch of his papers. It was papers from his adoption and the newspaper articles that went with it so I was looking through them and found his divorce papers. I flipped through it and saw his wedding date was Nov. 11th. Only 9 days off of our wedding anniversary. I told him and he assured me that it was no big deal and didn’t mean anything but I just feel bummed about it. 🙁 I realize it’s something I’m going to have to get over and just worry about our future and not his past but it’s going to take a little bit.
Post # 4
I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. But, I’m confused with the issue at hand? Is it what your anniversary will be? If so, then don’t be upset. There’s finite amount of days to have an anniversary.
Post # 5
@ShutterbugCait: i can understand how you would feel like this initially but don’t let it bother you. why would you? you knew he was married before. we all have pasts.
Post # 6
@BetterSherm: Yes it’s just the fact that his past anniversary and our anniversary will be so close. I know it’s trivial and trying to force myself to acknowledge that fact but right now I’m just having a hard time.
Post # 7
I know it’s a bit of a bummer, but believe when I say that he probably didn’t associate it because the old anniversary meant so little to him. To be honest, it was only while reading this thread that I realized that today would have been the 10th anniversary of my first marriage. It truly isn’t important.
Hope you feel better soon.
Post # 8
- Wedding: December 2012 - Hacienda los Agaves
@ShutterbugCait: Aww sweetheart, that sounds overwhelming, but think about this: he didn’t even remember the other anniversary, he doesn’t care, he doesn’t think about it, try to stop thinking about it yourself.
YOU ARE THE ONE WHO MATTERS NOW he loves YOU. 🙂
Post # 9
FH and I are about 12 days off from his first marriage and right now it looks like we will also have the same venue (there is one other we are going to check out this week and if it doesn’t work then it’s the the same venue).
I get how you feel, and thought about it briefly but figured anything I said or mentioned about it would only starting putting those old images in his head which I know are not there unless I bring them up.
I just think of it is same month & venue but RIGHT bride this time round 😉
Post # 10
It’s a bummer but I’d let it go. Don’t let it affect you 🙂
Post # 11
Men can’t keep the dates right on things they want to remember, or events for people they like. Don’t read too much on the date coincidence; I’d bet a dollar that he legitimately didn’t put the two together!
Post # 12
10 years from now, you will look back at this and wonder why you were even concerned…:) I would know!
HE PICKED YOU – it only matters in the end – HE PICKED YOU ! Now go and have a blast with the man who you picked!
Post # 13
At least it’s not on the same day… Enjoy YOUR day!