(Closed) I know I’m being whiney and a bit selfish but…

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1506 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Aw sorry to hear you’re feeling left out! I had a similar experience when my Darling Husband and I were having our pre wedding festivities. Hang in there. Do something nice for yourself, and remember that your husband will be your family now.

Post # 4
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I hate that etiquette. I bet a lot more brides plan their own showers and b parties but don’t step forward because someone high and mighty will stamp them with a tacky sticker.


If you want to throw a get together at the bar or club with your friends then do so. Buy your own drinks, accept free drinks if someone offers, and have a good time. I don’t see anything wrong with it.

Of course, the Emily Post and Miss Manners experts will say in stuffy british accents that it is “very unacceptable behavior for a bride to throw her own parties because that’s what the books say!”

No offense to british people. I always read etiquette with a british accent in my head. I don’t know why. 🙂

Post # 5
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Miss Tattoo:

Lol, I’m British and I’m throwing my own Bridal Party party! And I love it that way. I decide where we go, who comes and who pays what. There’s nothing wrong with it, and if you want one, do it! If they’re crap friends, take yourself out (maybe with mum/sister?) and do something lovely for yourself. Don’t let yourself feel down about it. God, there must be a million fantastic things you could do in Vegas yourself the night before your wedding. Don’t focus on those who make you feel bad and think about what you can do for you.

Hope you feel more positive soon x

Post # 7
2263 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I am sorry! I may be in your situation soon and will probably throw my own GNO instead. That’s the point of a Bridal Party anyway right? I think when it comes down to it, it won’t really matter who plans as long as all the girls and I have a fun night out together. Lol…. I also read those books in an English accent. 

Post # 8
4150 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m sorry you’re feeling down!! I don’t think I would have had anything if it weren’t for my sister throwing me things.  My BM’s have been less than stellar and I don’t have a lot of other girlfriends that would have done anything for me either.  That sucks that they wouldn’t even get together for a girls night though…but…is there a possibility they’re throwing you a surprise party?

Post # 9
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Where are you getting hitched in Vegas.  We did our thing last weekend- would love to share some ideas- feel free to PM me.

Post # 10
2183 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium

I understand– I never really wanted bridal shower, but now that the time has come, I’m sad I won’t have one. For my “bachelorette,” four close friends (three BMs) and I will be going out for a fun night after my rehearsal dinner (two nights before my wedding). They’re all out of town, and I’ve made it clear I don’t expect much. I just want to have fun… not to “celebrate my (almost) last night of being ‘single,'” (I haven’t been single in six years), but to celebrate being with my closest friends, who I don’t get to see nearly enough! 

Post # 12
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

two things

1. i dont think you are selfish.

2. i love your username! Twilight reference?

Post # 14
866 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

You’re not alone, I’m not have a bachelorette either. I wasn’t expecting one since I don’t have any bridesmaids, but I have to admit that I feel a little down occasionally when I think about my fiance’s bachelor party. His brother and a few other friends are throwing it for him, and I know he sometimes feels a bit guilty that he’ll have that experience and I won’t.

Post # 15
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’m sorry you’re feel bad about this.  My Maid/Matron of Honor did nothing to plan mine, but luckily two of my Bridesmaid or Best Man stepped up- and wouldn’t you know it, Maid/Matron of Honor was complaining the entire time (how much it costs, who isnt responding, which bars we went to).  I think it might have been a lot easier to plan my own, so that one Bridesmaid or Best Man wasn’t stuck doing everything while the Maid/Matron of Honor got the credit.

If I were you, I would treat myself to a spa day, maybe even in Vegas while the Fiance is out with his “lady escorts” 🙂  Just remember that in the end it doesn’t matter what happens before, all that counts is that you will be married!  I know you know that, but sometimes it’s nice to hear.

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