Post # 1
We were like Meredith and Christina Yang (Grey’s Anatomy)–inseparable and basically the same person, for years when she, for no apparent reason, dropped me right after I got engaged.
Sometimes I wonder if she couldn’t handle the fact that I was getting married and “leaving” her behind, b/c we wouldn’t have that Thelma-and-Louise type friendship anymore…I don’t know. Being a bride makes you so paranoid and think everything’s about you and your wedding, so I wanted to see what you all thought, and if something similar happened to you (losing a best friend suspiciously close to your wedding, or in events related to your wedding).
Post # 3
I’m so sorry to hear you’re losing your friend 🙁
I don’t know a lot about JW, but … any group that doesn’t allow their members to interact with others makes me a little worried (well, it raises the ‘cult red flag’ in my mind). Should we/you be worried about her safety?
Post # 4
thank you so much for your concern…I decided to edit the post and take the part about JW out since it was a little too personal (for her, just in case). I agree, it seems like a cult, but not to the extent that I’d be worried about her safety…she made her own decision, which is perhaps the most hurtful. :/
Post # 5
yeah i have a friend ship tht is a little more rocky then it once was because of the wedding.
Post # 6
I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
I haven’t personally, but my FI has lost three of his best friends, all of whom were supposed to be in the wedding. One of them didn’t like me, so he spread lies about me to get everyone else to not like me – and they didn’t bother asking my FI if they were true – there were just jerks to me and told me off, the wife of one of them even got my cell number from someone and called me all kinds of names, and at the time, I had no idea why.
As if that isn’t bad enough, once they found out that the original friend lied, they demanded my forgiveness, and then got even more nasty when I refused to grant it. I suspected that they weren’t really sorry, they just wanted me to forgive them so they would feel better about themselves. I guess I was right, because they turned into monsters when I said as much.
I feel horrible for my FI, but at least he knows who these people really are. And it’s not who he thought they were. It doesn’t make it hurt any less to know that, but at least he was able to confront them and move on.
I’m sorry this is happening to you. 🙁 I watched my FI struggle with this and even cry about it – it broke my heart. They can say what they want about me, they barely know me, but the fact that they hurt him is what makes me loathe them.
Post # 7
I’m not yet engaged but I feel like the impending ring is putting a strain on several of my relationships. I am a person who has had some hard times, but even when I was really unhappy with my life I feel like I made a concerted effort to celebrate with my friends when things were going well for them…
Now things in my life are going great, and my bf is getting ready to propose. One of my friends is helping my bf pick the ring, and she has been SO great all along. I’ve told my 3 other close friends about the impending ring and was pretty disappointed by their responses. I have made a serious effort to not talk about the potential engagement much because I don’t want to be “that” girl… but I felt like they should be a little bit happier for me when it did come up. They are all having a hard time in their personal lives and I do feel that the fact that I’m going to be getting married soon is reminding them that they’re not or something? My plan is to just tread lightly once I’m officially engaged. If people seem disinterested, I’m just going to realize it isn’t about me but about them and not talk about it around them. Sucks when our friends can’t just be happy for us… but sometimes we just have to deal.
Post # 8
I’m so sorry to hear about your losing your best friend over a wedding/marriage. I think a lot of it may be jealosy related too. I know that when a good friend of mine announced her engagement last year – well, I was actually there when she got engaged and that’s when I was ‘bitten by the green eyed monster’ of jealousy. I have finally come to accept that I was quite jealous of her (and a little hurt, albeit it wasn’t her fault). She is now my MOH, and is still a very good friend (I was one of her bridesmaids). We have gotten back to being great friends, and I now realize how silly it was for me to be jealous of her for something like that. 🙂 But I think that jealousy is one of those things that if it’s not acknowledged and addressed, it can fester like an untreated wound. Just my 2 cents.