Post # 1
…and feel so lucky to get along with her so well when it seems like a kind of rare thing. But now, less than 2 weeks away she is driving me BANANAS! (called me today to see if I would consider adding yet another DIY project — 11 days away!!!! plus is generally being a negative nancy and spreading around her stress to the rest of us.)
I’m on edge already trying to finish all my work (for my actual job!) for this week before being off for 2 weeks, and this is like adding fuel to the fire. Any advice on how to stay calm?? I don’t want to hurt her feelings (she means a lot to me) but she is seriously making me have high blood pressure…
Post # 3
Just tell her she is stresing you out! Say “I know this is a really important day not just to me, but to our whole family, but there is alot on my plate right now and I can only handle one project at a time. I think it would be better for everyone if we kept our stress levels low.” She may not even know she is driving you crazy!
Post # 4
If you have a good relationship, it would probably be fine to just gently remind her that you are pretty stressed and that maybe she should bounce her ideas off someone else for a while?
Date Twins! Its COMING!! I love my MIL, too, so high five on that, too ^__^
Post # 5
Thank you!! you are right, she probably doesn’t know.
mskalinin – so exciting! are you ready?
Post # 6
I love mine too (even if she doesn’t KNOW she’s going to be my FMIL yet since we’re not officially engaged) but I get the feeling that she’s going to be a pretty hands off MIL. Their family is very…. formal and stoic so I don’t predict alot of problems.
Post # 7
I am SO GLAD you posted this… I am already getting high blood pressure from FMIL and still have 8 months to go. Normally we get along great, but lately she has been driving me insane… It’s like we’re (FI & I) intruding on her plans. She hates all of our ideas, and won’t even listen to what FI wants, much less me :(. So we quit asking for opinions, because someone’s feeling will get hurt, and we don’t want it to be ours (selfish, maybe, but it’s working.)
Maybe with the diy project you could tell her that she’s welcome to do it, but you just don’t really have the time? Or you can only squeeze in an hour one night to help?
Post # 8
Good call on not sharing all your opinions, Appleblossom. We stopped doing it eventually too for the same reason. It’s like the moms are all about planning the wedding THEY want! Which always seems to be so 80’s….?
She did back down on this one, my mom stepped up and convinced her it was a waste of time. and trees 😉
I think if you like your FMIL and can make it through wedding planning and STILL like her….you will be in good shape!