Post # 1
When I first got engaged I had a nice group of friends that always hung out together. Seven couples that all got along, went to dinners together, had parties together and celebrated birthdays together.
The bottom fell out when one wife was having an affair with her husbands best friend. From there it all went down hill. Obviously the couples split and the two that were having their affair are together. Then all the other couples were forced to choose sides and that quickly got ugly. And to make things worse the two people that were jilted are now together as a couple.
Initially it was kind of like “ok I’m not friends with your ex who cheated on you” and that is fine. But now its also “oh I’m not supposed to be friends with people who are friends with your ex” and it is just really getting ridiculous. At this rate I won’t have any friends left.
So two of my bridesmaid and my “bridesman” are in the middle of all of this. None of them are getting along and it is really draining me. I feel like I am constantly mediating and trying to get everyone to just get along.
At this point I really want to skip the bridal showers and the whole bachelorette party thing. I feel like it would just be a big sham and I don’t want that. It is supposed to be a time to be with friends and have fun and I just really don’t have the energy to fake that. I’m not worried about the wedding itself because I think that I will be too involved in our own events to let them affect us.
Anyway I just had to get some of this off my chest. I’m just so tired of the drama.
Thanks for listening.
Post # 3
Aw I am so sorry! I really feel for you. My “friends” are doing something like that to us–specifically, we were good friends with a bunch of people, but they got mad at me and so are trying to “steal” all the other friends! It SUCKS!
We’ll be your couple-friends! Just swing by 🙂 And seriously, don’t let it get to you. Branch out–start a new activity, or find people at church if you’re religious. You’ll eventually find the people you should be friends with, people who don’t make you pick and choose. Just think, the relationships have developed into toxic friendships now, so maybe it’s best to find out everything and know you need to be meeting new people. It’s hard, but doable, and you’ll feel happier when the stress is gone. I do!
EDIT: Sit them all down and tell them you don’t want to hear about it during your wedding events, and don’t worry about the rest. If they’re real friends, they’ll shut up and be happy for you. And you can tell them that.
Post # 4
Wow. *cue theme music, courtesy of Benny Hill*
That sounds intense. And I’m sorry for saying so, but almost comical. I’m so sorry that you are going through all this. You’d think that after everything that’s gone on they’d be okay with taking a rest and focusing on getting along for your sake. I know I’D welcome the change of pace!
Post # 5
Wow… I’m with cinemaparadiso – ask them to leave it at the door for all wedding related events. If specific people have trouble with that, talk to them one on one and ask if they would prefer to be relieved of their bridal party duties. Sucks to lose part of your party, but you can still invite them as guests and it might be worth saving the drama.
Hope they can all be mature for your sake. :/
Post # 6
MissHelen–Seriously that is Hilarious!! about the Benny Hill music!!
Thanks for giving me a laugh about the whole situation:)
Post # 7
*hugs* For real, sometimes it stinks getting older and dealing with adult problems… hold your head up, be kind to everyone and let the pieces fall where they may. All you can do is hold your tongue, be gracious and kind to everyone. Lots of hurt feelings running rampant, I bet, and you def don’t need to be in the middle of it all!
Post # 8
Wow. Just wow.
I’d tell the people involved that while I understand and sympathize with their situation, I’d really appreciate it if they could leave the drama at home and not stir it up at wedding related events.