Post # 1
Well, first of all i am officially a MRS!!!!! Now that life is back to normal and WAAAY more amazing than I ever expected, the Mr. and I have some trips to take.
The biggest one weve planned for this year kicks off in Vegas for a couple days then from there we are flying to San Francisco (one of my favorite cities ever) for a dear friends wedding.
We sorta pushed back our honeymoon due to funds and made this our mini-moon…..
Did I mention this dear friend is my ex-bf’s sister? I know, I know, I have an amazing husband for agreeing to not only attend this but make it part of our mini-moon and I only recently realized what a huge step this was for him. Honestly when i think of my dear friend, i truly forget she is the sister of my exbf.
Well, I told him that if there is any part of the evening that becomes uncomfortable we can step out, no big deal but she has asked us to join the rehearsal dinner since we will be out of town guests. I would love to go but thats an intimate dinner with my ex and the whole family. Not super comfy for my husband who has not even met the SF bride.
So after my long winded message, I want to decline the dinner invitation and i want to be honest with her but i feel like no matter how i decline it, its going to seem immature.
what would you do? or say?
Post # 3
Maybe state that since this is your minimoom that you already have plans with your husband?
Post # 4
i wouldn’t take any offense if i was the bride in that situation. and if she’s a dear friend, she will most certainly understand. just be honest. 🙂
Post # 5
I don’t think it looks immature. I agree with the others, just thank her, decline, and tell her you look forward to the wedding.
Post # 6
First, I wouldn’t decline until you talk to your husband. I know you said attending the wedding would be a big step for him, but I would just tell him about the invite and get his input. If you both still want to decline, say thank you but you husband has planned a romantic evening together since you are on your honeymoon. Good luck!
Post # 7
I agree with all those above–make some great dinner plans/explore SF. Plus it will be a perfect time for you and your husband to connect and spend time alone before going into what could be awkward (although it seems like it won’t). Have fun!!
Post # 8
Just let her know that this is your mini honeymoon and you all have plans to explore the city and enjoy a romantic dinner, but you can not wait to see her at the wedding…
Who knows… maybe she is also hoping to avoid this akward sitaution and was only inviting for etiquette? I am sure there will be no hurt feelings.
Post # 9
My husband knows about the invite and such, we discussed it and he is the one who suggested it may be awkward, i think the wedding is enough.
I think we are going to decline and explore the city.
Post # 10
I think if you tell her the truth that you are making her wedding a stop on your mini-moon and you want to spend as much time as a couple as you can then she will understand.
I think there is a lot of inviting out of courtesy with weddings. I’m sure in the end she would have loved to see you at the rehearsal but its also one less dinner for them to pay for.
Post # 11
Yeah I agree, you will be attending the wedding and that is the important part! Say you have other plans whilst there and you are sorry you cannot attend the meal but I wouldnt tell her the real reason. A white lie is ok when there is a good reason behind it. Don’t worry she should be fine with that, I wouldnt be offended if it was me.
Post # 12
Not immature at all! I would definitely politely decline, and use your minimoon as an “out” (that is, if you feel you have to explain it at all). She won’t think twice about it, even if she’s disappointed you won’t be there. That’s what I’d do, not only because it may make your hubby slightly uncomfortable, but also because I’ll bet you guys want some alone time on your minimoon!