Post # 1
Ok, I’m working 2 jobs, (One graveyards, one evenings) My sweetie, works normal job, does other jobs on the side. We are in a long distance relationship. We talk on the phone when we can, I used to wake him up every morning but time change I sometimes can’t stay awake long enough to talk to him. But it cutting into my sleep big time. He calls me at work, but he going to bed super late because I’m not available to chat at work till late. We are getting exhausted trying to talk each other.
So any spare moment, we call each other, Any other spare moment I have when he not available I work on wedding stuff.
I put in 70+ hours last week, 60 this week and even though it slow at work. I have been doing tons of stuff for the wedding in my free time. (Ok, as long as my work done.)
It hit me that I have not a minute to myself, I need some time for myself. Without wedding, without my sweetie, without working, without family drama, without anything. I feel guilty when I do get time. My sweetie is really really missing me, but even when I talk to him, he gets to do what he likes, (plays one of his computer games) and talk to me. He super content with this. I’ve been by myself for years, sharing every moment is been kind of a culture shock! I feel guilty, using up any spare moment, not in doing something for others.
If I shut off my phone for an just an hour or so considered mean! LOL I need my time…
Post # 3
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
Wow, this was me and my FI when we were long distance. The time difference between Cali and England was really difficult, so my FI would stay up til all hours waiting for me to get home so we could skype for a bit. On weekends sometimes we left skype on ALL day.
I would feel guilty if I went out on the weekends because of that. Not that he actually said anything, but still– it was our only time.
Just be honest with your FI and let him know that every so often you NEED an hour on your own. Long distance is just SO hard– if getting yourself an hour of you time makes it a teensy bit easier, then it’s worth it. Let him know that!
Post # 4
If you don’t take time for yourself, it’s going to make everyone around you and everyone you love miserable. Take an hour to yourself to do nothing! Don’t feel bad. It’s in everyone’s best interest.
Post # 5
I think the hardest, I will tell him I need the time to do something. He knows I’m awesome multi tasker (a work requirement). So he calls anyways knowing I can do 2 things at once. But I have event coming up that requires my FULL Attention and he wants to help but I’m not used to help. So he doing more damage then good. LOL I’m trying, I’ve explained it too. So he be like ok, hang up. Then he will text me things I need to do for the wedding so I get distracted trying to complete this or that so he stop bugging me. Then I realize my free time gone and off to work I need to go! LOL I’m just venting I’m sorry! Even now I’m should be doing something else but I’m just venting on WB!
Post # 6
Taking time to vent on WB is perfectly fine!
No one is a machine – you can’t keep going and going and going without stopping to take a break.
Maybe instead of staying up late to speak with each other, you can do a bit more communicating through email? I write my friends very long emails and we write to each other back and forth like that. It’s a lot less time consuming than a full phone conversation, you can do it on your own schedule, etc.
Post # 7
Maybe you can schedule one or two days a week where you don’t call each other (unless it’s urgent), and take that time for yourself instead? It’s healthy for you and the relationship to lower your stress level even slightly.
Post # 8
This afternoon I woke up a little earlier than usually. Turn off my phone for an hour and did nothing it was nice feeling better!!!