Post # 1
So I’m now an engaged bee, but back when we were ring shopping, I fell in love with a ring. I took FH to see it, I could tell he wasn’t as in love with it as I was. When we left, he told me it wasn’t expensive enough and he didn’t want people to think he was cheap. I’m not going to say what the cost was, just that it was roughtly equal to 2 weeks take-home pay for him (1 cheque). I ended up getting a ring that was about 3 times that amount – what he said he was comfortable with and ‘appropriate’.
Am I the only one who’s SO said they weren’t spending enough money!?
This is the first ring I liked
and this is what we ended up with (which I love so much more)
Post # 3
@MsGinkgo: I like what you ended with way better! good choice
ETA: we didn’t talk price. I told him what I wanted and he got it for me
Post # 4
@FoxyBride14: Oh, I totally love my ring so much more, I will admit that part of what made me pick the first ring was the price – I wanted a proposal NOW and I knew we could afford that ring NOW. I didn’t realize how important the ring is/was to my FH. He’s more attached than I am and I think it was more important to him too (maybe because he made me wait so freaking long!!! 8.5 years!)
Post # 5
@MsGinkgo: I chose the setting for my ring and the stone is from his Grandmother’s ring but I have no idea what the valuation for the stone was and what the setting cost. I was told it’s a beautiful stone by the jeweler but there is such a range depending on clarity etc.
I can see it from your FI’s perspective as well as it’s not just about what you want it can also be a reflection of him to the world. It’s a tricky principle and as long as everyone is happy all around life is good.
Post # 6
I don’t have an engagement ring because they don’t really suit me or my lifestyle (I can’t drum in one!) but when we were buying my wedding band we didn’t really take price, so far as appropriateness was concerned, into account. We went for the design I wanted (gold and diamond band) at a price I felt I comfortable with because I’m not someone who could cope with the responsibility of wearing thousands of pounds’ worth of ring on my finger.
However, my DH did want me to have the perfect ring for me so we had a general idea of what we wanted to spend. As a result, we had to escape from one shop where the very pushy staff were determined to sell us a wedding band for £5000. It wasn’t even what I wanted!
Your ring is absolutely gorgeous so I think you’ve made a great choice.
Post # 7
- Wedding: October 2014 - Disney
My ring is my dream ring upgraded, but it took a lot of prying for my husband to get that out of me. He wanted a bigger stone than I’d ever considered, and I was willing to take a cheaper setting figuring my fancy dreams were too expensive. I figured I’d end up with a 3 stone sapphire ring with a stone half the size of the one I have now.
Post # 8
Wow, the ring you have is gorgeous!
Post # 9
@Steampunkbride: @CarterLove: thanks for showing my ring some love. It is exactly what I wanted. When I tried it on, FH and I knew we were done looking, that was the one 🙂
Post # 10
Haha, DH wishes!
We negotiated between 3 months’ salary (I love that completely riddiculous “rule”) and what DH wanted to spend, which was about 5k
We ended up meeting exactly in the middle, which was 3 months’ salary after taxes/401(K) contributions/insurance.
Post # 11
I picked out a $1700 ring from an online wholesaler. I was okay with my FI not spending much on a ring for me. After we got engaged, he told me the price of my ring. He spent $3500 and got a great deal on it as it was a discontinued Neil Lane ring, and 50% off. Original price was about $7,000, but I’m sure that the “original price” was jacked up a bit before they put it on clearence!
Post # 12
- Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island
We didn’t talk price either.
He picked a ring, and I was honestly blown away at how gorgeous it was! I could tell just by looking that it was expensive. It’s kind of funny now because I think about 20 minutes after the proposal, I said something like “It’s so much nicer than I was expecting!” LOL! My ring has pave diamonds on the band, and I was expecting more of a straight plain band with a solitaire. So when he pulled out this diamond encrusted ring, I was shocked!
He asked me if I wanted to know how much he spent and I said sure. And then my mouth dropped even more because it was about 2 months takehome pay. I absolutely love my ring and can’t imagine having anything else. But I didn’t expect my SO to be comfortable spending that much money.
Then when it came time to pick out wedding rings, I liked a ring that was about 1.2 months takehome pay. I asked him over and over again if that was too much, and he was like “If that’s the one you like, then that’s the one we’re getting.” I think it made a difference for him that I’m incredibly sentimental. So I will never “upgrade” my rings or diamonds.
Post # 13
I was the opposite in that the rings I liked were more than FI’s budget! Oops!
Regardless, he wanted to be the one to pick it out. He spent a bit more than his original budget, but I absolutely love it. It’s not something I would have picked out for myself and I love that he really liked it as well.
Post # 14
My husband was very hesitant when I told him I wanted a moissanite (he bought into the whole “it has to be a diamond” thing) and specifically asked for a non-diamond engagement ring. My ring cost a faction of one month’s take-home for my husband, but I argued that he had also bought me a house 😉
Post # 15
The ring (well, the whole set) I picked out originally (which he did cave in and buy me) was about two weeks income for FI and he wanted to spend quite a bit more (I insisted that the original set was perfect, and if it were made properly and the quality it claimed to be it would have, however I had a number of issues with the ring and FI never liked the quality). Now he makes what the original set was in a day or two so we’re upgrading substantially to what is now still about two weeks income but the number value is substantially higher to a diamond and platinum custom set, and FI is MUCH happier with the new set being made than he was with my original set (I am too) :-).
Post # 16
@MsGinkgo: My ring we both fell in love with, cost 142$ taxes included at the discount section of a jeweler. 😉 I don’t get the whole ”it has to be equal to 3 months of salary” thing. Maybe he was willing to afford it, but it’s not because you can, that you have to. You love the ring. It’s all that matters, and people don’t have to know how much your FI paid for it. And it surely doesn’t scale your FI’s love for you according to ring prices.