I shouldn't have done it… (kinda long)

posted 3 years ago in Full Figured
Post # 3
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would wait until you see the finished, edited pictures in person before making a judgement one way or the other. Editing and a bit of emotional space can make a big difference. This may also be a good opportunity to have a discussion with your photographer about any insecurities around weight and what sort of poses you most prefer.

I wouldn’t be too worried about your wedding day because wedding dresses are designed to be flattering and to cover up any problem areas while emphasizing your good points. Keep in mind as well that a veil can be a godsend in flattering the arms/shoulders (heels can also be slenderizing and great for the posture). You’re absolutely going to look fantastic on your wedding day, so don’t stress!

Post # 4
Member
3210 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Oh no! I’m so sorry it didn’t go well, especially because I have definitely been of the commenters who always tells girls to go for it with boudoir sessions.

I agree with the PP that some distance will help, as will looking at the whole set of photos. For mine, there are some that probably didn’t look bad to the photographer, but that I personally found dreadful because they emphasized what I would consider a problem area. (Like, hello, when I’m bent over to the side like that, I have got some serious rolls!) Maybe they just showed you sneak peeks of not awesome ones?

And editing is huge too! I don’t know WHY they would show you pre-edited pictures!?

Oh AND it just occurred to me that when I first got mine, there were like 30 (out of 100) that I thought looked terrible. (One of my outfits was kind of a loose floaty thing, and at first I thought it made my torso look SO wide!) After looking at them again later, I realized that I was being silly, and that they were actually really lovely. So you may just need some time with the photos to realize you’re focusing on stuff that your FI/other people would never focus on. Even with our e-pics, which I lovelovelove, the very first time I glanced through them, I wasn’t crazy about them–I think actually taking some time and staring at them for a while helps.

Try not to stress! I bet they are WAY better than you think.

Post # 5
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I have had the same realization. I have started worked out daily now because of a picture I saw of myself…realizing that is what everyone else sees and that I do not look as good as I thought I did was enough of a wake up call for me!

I’m sorry you don’t like the pictures. Editing will help, but it won’t solve the bigger issue of you being unhappy with your body how it actually looks. I would say that you stick to what you’ve been doing – getting fit – and then you will love pictures again 🙂

Post # 7
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@CatABee:  Personally, I’d take them showing you the unedited pictures as a compliment – it means that to their eyes you already look so fantastic in the photo that they think you will love it even without any editing. 🙂 Remember – we are our own worst critics when it comes to photos and everyone judges their own “problem areas” much more harshly than other people will. Hopefully they can fix the parts you don’t love, and even if they can’t, it is a really good chance to point out anything you don’t like so you don’t have the same problems on your big day!

Post # 9
Member
328 posts
Helper bee

@CatABee:  I would not want to be shown unedited photos!  I’m sorry you felt disappointed-but I also am sure you looked beautiful, and I know for a fact that your SO is going to be in love with them.

Post # 10
Member
2395 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@MrsPanda99:  +1.  I am a fatty (not saying that you are, OP!) and pictures are my worst nightmare.  When I finally realized that I was starting to look like a balloon with a grape on top of it, I got serious and have lost 26 lbs.  I’ve got a long way to go, but I’ll never be happy with any photo, no matter how well edited, while I’m this fat.

Post # 11
Member
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

All I can say is that your fi loves you for you. He’ll love the pictures and in the end that’s all that matters. We’re all so much harder on ourselves than our loving other halves are on us. 

As for your wedding day you’ll look gorgeous! Its hard to look bad in a wedding dress and a smile on your face. 

Post # 12
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@oneofthesethings:  Exactly this. And I don’t want to require editing to like pictures of myself. I remember when I actually was skinny :-

Post # 13
Member
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Your FI loves you for who you are right now, he asked you to marry him with the body you have now. I’m sure that when your man gets to see those pictures he will get excited and see the beautiful person that you are! We can be so self crtitical and and ruin it for ourselves. ( I do that too) Guys think and see us differently than we look at ourselves. Take some time and hopefully you’ll love your pictures with fresh eyes.

Post # 15
Member
6 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I had a pin up shoot done and took other half to see/pick photos. I only intended to take the one photo included and wanted him to help choose. When we looked through I was mortified at some, and almost everyone I had an issue with. I ended up leaving with 5 photos as they ( my friend was there too) convinced me they were good. We went through one by one and sometimes they looked at me like I’d grown an extra head because they didn’t see what my problem was. 

Bit long and rambly but basically saying don’t let your first impressions get ypu down, and like others have said, no one will be as harsh as yourself.  

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