Post # 1
I’m getting married in August of 2010. I bought my wedding dress about a month ago, on the first time out looking – my mom cried when she saw me in it ^_^. I absolutely love the dress because it’s not one of those traditional dresses with a huge skirt that would probably get very hot in August weather. It also has an empire waist with ‘off the shoulder’ straps embellished with detail.
Well, I was having some second thoughts about the dress since I bought it the first time looking. My finace was really excited about it and wanted to see, so I agreed to show him a few (I really wanted to see what he thought!) with mine in the mix so I could see if he liked it or not.
In order to throw him off, I went through a good… 50 ish dressed before we got to mine (not a good idea). He was almost positive that the dress was in the collection before the collection mine was in (and mine was the first dress in that collection) so when it came to mine, he wanted to talk about the previous collection because he thought we had already passed mine… offhandedly saying that my dress (not knowing it was mine of course) looked like a nightgown.
Obviously I couldn’t hide my disappointment, and he knows which one mine is now. Of course he says that he loves it and can’t wait to see me in it on our wedding day. I can’t help feeling bad about the whole thing. I contacted the designer to see if there was any way I could possibly return it and order a different style, but it might be too late.
What should I do? Try and sell it or return it and get a different one? I know I shouldn’t have showed him to begin with, I have a feeling it would be very difficult to sell it even though it hasn’t been altered.. it hasn’t even come in yet!
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Post # 3
My fiance’s seen a quick flash of mine, too. No big deal!
Post # 4
oops, sorry, posted before I saw your other fleshed out post. 🙂
Post # 5
Do YOU still want to wear the dress? I think it gorgeous. I say that if you feel amazing and love the dress then you should wear it. The bride makes the dress, not the other way around. As long as you feel like you look amazing in it you will and you fiance/husband won’t even notice what you’re wearing.
Post # 6
I think that boys are dumb and the dress is beautiful. Wear it!
Post # 7
My FI saw my dress too, so I wouldn’t worry about it. He can be very picky at times so I wanted his opinion…..if you asked him today what it looked like I don’t think he could tell you because he would have forgotten.
Post # 8
Mine the other day actually wanted to know if I wanted to show him it! He knows I hate secrets and can’t keep them 🙂
I wouldn’t worry about it. Not like he’s seen you in it.
Post # 9
I LOVE that dress – it reminds me of my mother’s gown which I would have totally worn if I were a size 4. So chic and elegant 🙂
But, if you feel that uncomfortable, I would see if the designer would let you switch out for another style.
Post # 10
Any dress on the model doesn’t look anything like you’re going to look with the dress, hair, makeup, jewelry, etc. I’m sure you’ll look lovely on your wedding day, and he’ll definitely think so.
Post # 11
I think because of the circumstances, if I were you–I’d go for a new dress that you could feel confident and beautiful in.
If you’re going to spend your wedding day wondering if he thinks you look like you’re wearing a night gown (and you will likely spend some time before the wedding benig worried about that because of his reaction), than I think you should find a new dress–no peaking, and before you do that get an idea for what he likes so you can compromise!
Post # 12
honestly, rarely can a man visualize what a piece of clothing is going to look like on you. he may have been tricked by the staging of the model photos. he’s not picturing it on you, with your hair/makeup/shoes/beautiful face, etc. he sees it like it is – a model that looks like an 18-year-old jennifer lopez, laying back on some victorian cushions and standing in front of a french-bedroom-like damask wallpaper. that’s not to say that the model photos aren’t lovely – but can you see how that setting might influence how he feels about the dress? do you think it would be different if, say, the photos of the model were in a meadow with wildflowers?
i think YOU need to feel beautiful about what you are wearing. if his comments make you feel less beautiful in the dress, then consider getting another. but if you put it on and still feel like the gem that you are (and that your FI is lucky to have), then this dress is still the one for you.
Post # 13
I agree with Mrsbear, my future brother in law has seen my sisters dress, but he says he doesnt even rememebr what it looked like, and it will look different on you than the model. If you and your mother love it. Stick with it, I bet he’ll love it to, because you’ll be wearing it, not the model!
also, I am absolutely in love with your dress, who is the designer?
Post # 14
He will feel differently when he sees YOU in the dress!
Post # 15
If YOU still love it, maybe you should still wear it. August 2010 is a long time away and he might not even remember it anymore. I know my FI wouldn’t. I showed him pictures of myself wearing my top 2 dresses. I’m confident that most dresses look the same to him and he won’t remember it.
Post # 16
My fiance went dress shopping with me, so he’s seen me in everything. Dresses that looked good on the page didn’t look good on me, and ones that looked eh on the models looked great on me. It won’t look the same on you as it does on the model. And "eh, been there, seen that" won’t be on his mind when he sees you in the dress. Most men can’t tell lace from beading in a picture in a magazine. Just remember that not seeing the bride is an antiquated piggish tradition that used to prevent the groom from running away.