Post # 1
We were college sweethearts. The relationship only lasted 10 months before I stupidly dumped him and broke his heart. I instantly regretted it but I figured as time went on, I’d slowly get over him and find someone else when I was ready to get serious. Almost five years later, here I am, still filled with regret.
He was handsome, caring, a total sweetheart and he only had eyes for me. Not to mention, he was the ONLY guy my dad ever liked. I’ve had several boyfriends since then and none of them have made me as happy as he did. As much as I try to make things work, it always feels like something’s missing and the relationship inevitably falls apart.
I haven’t seen him since Halloween 2010. We’re friends on Facebook but we haven’t spoken to each other in a really long time. I miss his smile. I found an old framed picture of us from our college days a few weeks back and I couldn’t help but cry.
He moved away shortly after we graduated, so there’s little to no chance that I’ll ever see him again unless I contacted him.
It says he’s newly single on Facebook. My dad thinks I should contact him but I don’t know. I feel like I have nothing to offer in a relationship. He has a nice house, nice car, and a great job. I’m back living at home, working two part time jobs and trying to pay off my student loans. I’m a shell of my former self. Yes, I have a happy life and I have a lot to be thankful for but when it comes to my love life, I haven’t been happy in a very long time.
I know I brought this upon myself but I can’t help but feel stupid for throwing away a perfect relationship and a great guy who loved me just because I didn’t want a serious relationship in my early 20’s. I go back and forth all the time as to whether or not I should contact him and beg him for a second chance.
I’m not depressed, I’m just a little regretful.
Post # 3
You only live once! If you never try to contact him, you will always wonder. If you do contact him and get a response that you don’t like, you will never have to see him again, and at least you got closure.
Post # 4
How long has it been? Sometimes you can have feelings for who a person used to be, but over the course of a couple of years they can be completely different. He may be a stranger now, or maybe if it’s in the cards he’ll be the same. Can you start a friendship with him? I would NOT look for anything romantic from this guy because you could be painting a picture of him in your mind/memories that isn’t the real him. You could end up powerfully disappointed. If I were you, I’d just try to get in touch again.
Post # 5
I think you should take the chance and contact him. Realistically, you have nothing left to lose, right?
If you don’t contact him, there’s practically no chance of you ever getting back together with him. If he rejects you, at least you will have closure and you won’t regret not contacting him.
You were very young.. I don’t think you did anything wrong per se. Most people aren’t ready to settle down in college. He probably wasn’t either.
I guess now you just have to decide how to do it. Do you play it cool (but it might be tough to play it cool if he lives in a different town now.. not like you can say “hey, let’s go for coffee!”), or do you spill it all out and hope he’s not like wtf?
Post # 6
I don’t know you and don’t know him, but is it possible that you’re putting him on a pedestal in your head? He may have been better than your other relationships, but that doesn’t mean he’s the only right person out there and your regret at ending the relationship may be making you remember him as a much better person than he was.
Post # 7
@SouthernBelAir: don’t avoid contacting him just because you feel that he has his life “put together” and you are not on par. If you regretted it back in 2010, and still aren’t over it, definitely contact him and give it another shot!!! If it doesn’t work this time, then you can can have peace of mind knowing that you guys are meant to be. Good luck!!!
Post # 8
@SouthernBelAir: why did you break up with him in the first place??
Post # 9
Also, OP, you said that you dumped him. Before you contact him think back and remember why you did this. If it was for a stupid reason then why not at least strike up a conversation with him and try to become friends again.
I don’t advise contacting him looking for love from the start.
Post # 10
@kgirl91: The only thing that’s changed is that he’s gotten even better looking with age. haha! My cousin ran into him at a BBQ in early June and she said he hasn’t changed a bit. She said he’s still the fun, happy-go-lucky guy everyone loves.
Post # 11
@kryren: I dumped him around graduation, which means we were both 22 or 23 at the time. He started talking about possibly moving in together and/or getting engaged a year or two down the road. I freaked out because I just wanted to have fun and didn’t want anything serious at the time.
Post # 12
Contact him!!!!! That’s the only way your questions will be answered!
Post # 13
I think you should go for it and contact him. You only live once and I’m a firm believer in having no regrets in life.
You never know, this may be what fate had in mind for you 😉
Post # 14
Go for it! You have nothing t lose!
Post # 15
I’d contact him. Like others have said, if he’s not interested then you can at least have the closure of knowing you gave it a shot. You won’t be wondering “what if?”
Post # 16
@FutureMrsBex: I know but it’s easier said than done. I’m shaking with nerves just thinking about it. It’s been years since we’ve talked and I’d have no idea what to even say to him.