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SO for those of you who read my post about buying a second bridesmaids dress you already have a little insight into my plight, so now here comes the full rant on this subject.
For those of you who don't know, my friend, who is getting married in August, just randomly decided to change everything. Colors, dresses, flowers, EVERYTHING. Me and the other bridesmaids are frantically looking for a cheap dress she will approve of since the lavender abominations we already have no longer "fit her dream". We are expected to pay for these dresses too. We cannot return the dresses and its not like we will ever be able to wear these horrible things again because they honestly look like the dress the bitch wore to prom in Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion ( I love this movie but that dress was tailored by Satan). What is it with people and horrible bridesmaids dresses anyway? Sorry I digress, so there is that lovely situation.
Now she wants to change the flowers. Well not just change, change the types and DOUBLE the amount. Now I am the one doing the flowers because I used to be a florist. She wants me to eat the cost of these changes because she "already paid me". Its not like I can pull flowers out of my ass and just make them work. I'm not a florist who just has a bunch extra sitting around and unfortunately since the flowers are already ordered (There is a reason for doing it this far in advance) I can't change the order from the person I get them wholesale from so I would have to pay for the original order AND the new order. I asked her several times before we ordered if she was sure this was what she wanted and now a week later it isn't right anymore.
On to the next thing. She expects us to pay for alcohol. She isn't going to pay for us to get sloshed but is ordering a shit load so she can but we have to reimburse her whether or not we drink any of it.
The location has to be changed now. Its nice trying to find a place 3 months out and she can't get her money back on the first place and blames us.
She wants a huge weekend at the casino for her bridal shower and we just can't afford that.
Does she not realize its not the bridesmaids job to pay for everything.
If any of you bees hear about a crazed red-head on a rampage in Oregon, I was on here all night ok? :P
Also I give you full permission if I even come close to acting like this to hunt me, find me, and slap the hell out of me for it.
Rant over....
Back out now!!! This chick is crazy! Tell her you can't eat the cost of the flowers, and that you absolutely will not be paying for alcohol for the wedding (how did she even come up with that idea?), and that the bridesmaids plan a bachelorette that they can afford to host.
Or just run like hell. I think I would run.
OMGeeeee!!! That's ridiculous. Can you and the rest of the BMs get together and have an intervention? She needs to take off the crazypants. Having a wedding doesn't suddenly make a person an empress. You are not her feudal serfs who have to pay fealty in the form of bridesmaid dresses and flowers and big nights out. Get your rampage on, Corilee13! This broad needs a reality check or at the very least a good shaking. Sorry you have to deal with this!
I would either back out or tell her straight up unless she is going to foot the bill you refuse to do any of it and will wear the ugly original bm dress.
Umm seriously you guys need to explain to her that you cant simply buy another dress. She asked for lavender and lavender is what she is gonna get. Personally I would just wear my lavender dress or step down. I wouldnt buy two dresses for one persons wedding just because she changed her mind.
Also you have to explain to her the even though she already paid you, that payment was for different flowers and if she was to change her mind now, then she has to pay extra for the new flowers
0_O I'm all about sticking things out through the end, but I agree. RUN, girl. Run...Next thing she's gonna have you paying for is the reception itself, or HER dress. She sounds like a loony tunes Bridezilla, and you've got zero obligation to be treated like something she found on the bottom of her shoe. If she's gonna be a nutcase and change everything and then blame you all for the problems she's having with "her vision", I'd tell her she needs to find a new bridesmaid... AND florist. Bite the bullet on the dress and flowers and get out while you still have your sanity!!!
This makes me think of the anti-drug campaign in the eighties - Just Say No.
Seriously, she needs to hear it. Tell her no to the flowers, no to the dress. No. There's just no other acceptable response here. She is so far out of line - if she wants to impetuously change everything at the last minute, she can do it on her own dime.
this isnt a friend. i would walk away from the entire thing and not look back.
@Corilee13: If any of you bees hear about a crazed red-head on a rampage in Oregon, I was on here all night ok? :P
Hahahaha...
Seriously though - run!! This would be a friendship-ender if I or any of my girlfriends did these sort of things. At the very least, I'd be telling her - so sorry, but I just can't afford to be a bridesmaid in this wedding. Since you've planned the flowers with her, tell her she can have the flowers the way you've already planned them, or she can find another florist. She's turning everything upside down already, tracking down one more vendor shouldn't be a big deal at all!
Good luck, and remember - murderous rampages are bad! ;)
Wow, you need to stand up and tell her no. It was nice enough you were willing to buy another dress.. but she is completely taking advantage of you. It's not your job to pay for booze. If is wasn't you doing the flowers she would expect to pay the difference for them.. she has no right to ask you to pay the difference. I would have a chat with her.. and if she doesn't stop being crazy back out!!
I can't even imagine doing what she is going to anyone, much less my bridesmaids! They're supposed to be your best friends! Gah. Get the hell out of there. Girl is crazy.
Hoookay. This lady is crazypants.
Friends don't treat friends liek the hired help, and they certainly don't mistake them for ATMs.
I would explain, in writing, that you're very sorry but you simply can't afford to eat the cost of the flowers, pay for alcohol and buy a new dress. If she throws a tantrum you have every right to bow out.
wtfffffffffffff please. step down and RUN AWAY, BRIDEZILLA ON THE LOOSE!!!
Oh here is the new one.
She wants me to dye my hair. Her hair is brown and mine is naturally red. If I keep my red hair then I will distract too much attention from her. My red hair will not take away from the poofy white dress. Oh and I need extensions because i'm the only one with shoulder length hair....wow...I'm so done with all of this.
@Corilee13: AHHMYGAWWWD i hope you're serious about being done!!!
@Corilee13: What. What?
Leave the wedding. Do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars.
I would just calmly step down. That is way too expensive and her requests are unnecessary.
@Corilee13: Quit the wedding, like, yesterday. I'd KILL for red hair. What a full-of-herself crazy.
Wow...is this for real? Does someone like this actually exist? She should be on Bridezillas!
Definitely back out now. Who asks their bridesmaids to dye their hair for their wedding?
@elliestan
Yeah I'm done. Because next she'd tell me to gain 20lbs cuz I'm the only size 4. We are all backing down unless she steps down from her position as mayor of crazy town.
Okay I change my mind RUN NOW, RUN VERY FAR AWAY. No bride should ever ever ask a BM to change their hair color
@Corilee13: This has to be a joke. You're pulling our legs, right?
I'm with many PPs - back out now. I can't believe someone would make requests like this.
@mightywombat
I really wish I was. I wish I had I video camera. I'd put her on YouTube.
How in the world do brides act like this? What could have possibly popped in her head to make her think that this is reasonable? I'm just appalled that people actually put up with this. I'm glad you and the bridesmaids are putting your feet down and telling her this is unacceptable. Then recommend her to Weddingbee so we can teach her some bridal manners!
Wow. She needs to get a wake up call from reality! I would not pay for anything else. She can have the flowers you ordered and like it or get others from some one else and I would not order any new dresses just wear the first one.
Run away, fast, and far! Host an intervention...ALL the bridesmaids need to confront her crazy and be real and honest with her. She *may* not realise she is being crazy *I doubt it* and need a slight push back into reality. If she insits on all the changes as a united front you need to tell her no.
She is being completely unreasonable...expect you to eat the costs of the flowers...hell to the no! Buy another dress...not bloody likely, and why the hell does she think it is acceptable for YOU to pay for the booze?!?! Are the groomsmen paying for the officient or some other nonsense???
RRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNN!!!!
@dixie1337
We were fine with the dresses if we could find super cheap ones but with the rest of this we are all stepping down if she doesn't calm down. I've been trying to get ahold of her to say this but she is ignoring me.
o_O So glad you're stepping down. I thought I heard everything when it came to bridezillas but no...something new every day.
How old is she? I hate to ask this, but what do you think her chances of a 'successful' (I hate that term, but you know what I mean) marriage.
I only ask because it seems the younger the bride (again, not all young brides are crazy, just saying a high percentage of over the top crazy bridezillas are young) and the less likely the marriage will last, the more over the top the behavior.
Time to step away, and don't look back!!!
She is 25 so two years older than me. Yeah that is still young but she should know better. But you're right. There are many reasons why I don't think this marriage will survive, this is only one of them. I've just tried to be supportive until now...
Hallmark should make cards for this.
"Dear so-called-friend, this is you:
Give my regards to Tokyo. I'm outta here."
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