- 4 years ago
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
Okay, so since we are doing a destination wedding in Italy, FI and I figured we would just not register and pretend that it isn’t even a gift-giving occasion. After all, the people who are coming are spending tons of money to be there with us, and that means more to us than a toaster. Besides, we have been living together for a few years. I’m not saying we don’t need anything, but the type of stuff we would want now is “upgrade” stuff that costs a lot more than the basics. Between that and the distance of the wedding, we figured we were golden.
Well, now my mom ells me that some of the relatives who can’t make the wedding have mentioned trying to come out for our at home reception when we get back. The thing is, we aren’t having one. All of our family besides parents live out of state, so it would be a waste of time and money. When she told them we aren’t having an at home reception, people said they would come to the bridal shower, then. But I figured we wouldn’t be having one for the same reason- everyone lives out of state, and I only have a few friends.
Mom has since convinced me that it could be a fun get-together (don’t worry, my family isn’t hosting- SIL wants to plan it), so I conceded and said we could do that. but now, we are going to have to register.
I feel so conflicted, because shower gifts are generally cheaper kitchen-gadget type things, where wedding presents are the expensive ones. I don’t know what to do, because there are a few utensils, etc, that we need, but like I said, most of what we want or need are pricier items, such as china settings, nicer bedding, etc. I don’t think there would be enough less expensive shower-type gifts available. I don’t want to just register for a bunch of stuff we don’t need. Help!
1) backpedal on this whole shower idea (mom says some of the relatives will be disappointed if there isn’t one).
2) figure out a way to have a giftless shower
3) other (give me your brilliant plan!)
P.S. We are not, under any circumstances, going to do a honeymoon registry or any other form of “give me cash”
ETA: The whole idea of registering makes me uncomfortable. I was raised not to ask for gifts. However you spin it, registering is basically asking for gifts.