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Hi! I don't have much advice but I just wanted to say I feel for you! I'm so sorry this is happenning at such a late stage. How much of a deposit have you given her? If its just flowers and a coordinator you need, I would cut my losses with this person and find other vendors or alternatives like non-floral centerpieces. It will be too late if you show up there on the day and the have the flowers be bad you know?
Is it in your budget to hire someone else and work later to try to get your deposit back from this coordinator? Do you have a family member or friend you can trust and would step in to coordinate your wedding? Then all you would need to find is a florist. I know its not ideal but if it were me I would prefer to not have the coordinator there that day if I completely didnt trust her even if i had already paid her.
Just try to remember that everyone coming to your wedding is there because they love you and your soon to be husband. Their aim will not be to criticize the lack of or the asthetics of the centerpieces so you will get this sorted out and have a fanatastic day no matter what. You still have six weeks, good luck and post again if you need help finding stuff
*big hugs*
First off - I'm so sorry this is happening to you! It sounds like you hve done everything to be nice about it and work with her.
Here's my suggestions, and remember I'm the one who usually doens't give people a 3rd chance, especillay with wedding stuff - I'd be going for the throught right now! What she is doing is not only illegal but immororal and simply putting her off like it's no big deal, is not an option. You have to stop her in her tracks.
I would first call another florist in the area and explain the situation, see if they can, in your time frame make you what you want. When you have someone who can - call your "coordinator" and tell her she will be getting your flowers, from XX place for XX of HER dollars no expections.
Your contract became null and void when she misrepresented herself and failed to produse a floriist and only a novice with a pack of carnations.
I would also be calling the police. And I'm not kidding on this. Who else will she do this too? She's misrepresenting herself, lying about the talents she's trained for and using anothers name with out their permission and trying to pass of work as theirs. Fraud is the best way to put that. The BBB is the first place I would start. Get your money back - or at least as much of it as possible.
Maybe work with this other person at the office she works at if you think you can trust her not to pass on info. I'd go straight for her job.
Fraud is illegal, and I'd start discussing with them at the office how they plan to fix this so that a bad BBB note isn't left....
They are being horrible! I can't believe that she thought she could get away with this!!!
I would say tell her you are firing her, because she is totalling lying to you. Then tell her you want a refund, and when she says no, tell her your lawyer will be in contact. Hopefully, she will get scared and get her sh*t together. Because it is so close to your wedding, you'd probably be better off sticking with her for the planning part. However, you absolutely have enough time to find a new florist. they need 2 weeks to order flowers. since you already know exactly what you want, it should be very easy! my friend had a florist issue, smae time frame as you - their florist went bankrupt, and disappeared with their money. basically, they lose, but they got another one at a great deal and got exactly what they wanted. supermarket florists are probably less money too - but really, I woudl not stick with this girl for your flowers. she clearly has no idea what she is doing.....and I remember this post from before - she really is completely overcharging you!!!!
This may be a silly idea. I don't know where you're from, but here in Oklahoma, our local news stations do stories about stuff like this as human interest things. A threat to do something like that might get you somewhere. No one wants to be on the news for how horrible their business is.
Does she belong to any associatons like ABC or ACPWC? If so, you have a recourse. With ABC, if you're not happy with your coordinator's work, you can contact the state coordinator and discuss the problem. You might be able to get a different coordinator and discuss the honesty and charging issues. What ever you do, please don't put up with this treatment. You paid for a professional service and if you're not receiving it, then something must be done. I feel strongly about this because this coordinator is giving others a bad name and solid business ethics is so crucial to being a part of someone's wedding day. She should not be adding stress to your wedding planning, she should be taking it away.
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I think it's already been mentioned, but talk to a lawyer--what she did is fraud, and you might not have to count the money you've already spent as a complete loss. Hopefully the threat of legal action will get her to refund the money you've already spent. I also second reporting her to the better business bureau.
I'm so sorry you had to deal with this--good luck!
I agree with all the advice from the Hive.
1) Re-read your contract and if you have a lawyer friend (or a Bee that is a lawyer and might possibly want to look it over???) Have them check it out to see what sort of recourse you have.
2) Contact your other vendors, (photo, video, cake) and ask them if they have had issues with your current planner. If they are really good friends with your planner, then don't contact them about it ---- it will get back to her.
3) As said before, check and see if she is a member of ABC or a local planners network. She most likely is. Call them IMMEDIATELY and file a complaint. If you have a tv network that does investigative stuff, then make the call.
Question: In your payment to the Coordinator, was some of what you were paying for the Decorator's fee as well?
4) Start researching other florists or 'Event Designers', you can find someone girl --- Spring business on the West Coast is slow this year, people are available. Not sure what sort of budget you have for floral, but just be really upfront with your budget and tell them your situation.
5) Fire her ass. It sounds like she is trying to pull one over on you and biting off more than she can chew and is highly deceptive. Has she been in business long? This is all unacceptable. Once you've had a legal person check your agreement and you are at peace with the finacial outcome ---- get rid of her.
Tell her that because of her dishonesty she has breeched the contract, that you expect a full refund (ask for full and then work your way down --- she will probably be covered to keep the retainer if her contract is solid). Tell her you have already contacted her local Associations and the BBB and that you'd like to resolve this swiftly and amicably, otherwise she will hear from your lawyer.
p.s. it helps if you have a lawyer friend if they can write a letter saying they've been retained by you. that's always a nice 'oh shit' moment.
Thank you all so much! I looked at her website and found that she is a member of the Association of Bridal Consultants. I am going to talk to the florist later today and try to get what info I can out of her....and then I will give them a call. Im not sure where to go from there....
Hang in there, Jennilee and keep us posted!
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I would totally hire a new florist, right now. Unlike photographers, florists often do several events on the same day - as long as they can accomodate all the delivery and set-up. So it is not as big a deal to get a florist sort of "last minute" as it would be with other vendors.
I would also let your coordinator know that the game is up - that you strongly suspect from talking to the decorator that she lied to you about the centerpieces. Let her know that you have chosen another florist, and also that you are contacting the ABC to file a complaint. I would make sure to do all this in person (you and your FI, maybe even bring another friend or family member as a witness). If possible figure out how difficult it would be to get another coordinator altogether. I hope you saved all the emails on this subject, as they will come in handy if you have to take her to small claims court to get your money back.
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Pretty Katie that is a GREAT idea! Our news teams in my area do that too!!!! Awesome thought!!!
**UPDATE**My fiance talked to the florist and explained the situation to her. Just like I thought, she had no idea what he was talking about! She was talking about signing contracts not even realized that our coordinator had already had us sign a contract for "her work". BUSTED! At this point, if we can get our coordinator to fork over the money to the REAL florist, then I will be able to breath a little easier until the big day. Now I dont know what to do about confronting her. Maybe this is the time to call the Association of Bridal Consultants and see what they think....hmmmmm....
Wow. I think the mistake here is having a single contract, such that everybody works for the coordinator and not for you, and she handles all the money. Is that normal? It seems like a very risky situation. I would think that someone could plan, find vendors, and coordinate services without having their fingers in your entire budget.
Good sleuthing Jennilee. Hopefully the florist thing will work out. Keep us updated. We're rooting for you.
wow I can't believe I just read all that. I'm glad to read that it's turning out to be a somewhat good ending for you. Just sending you good wishes as you approach your wedding day. Keep us updated. I'm interested in how everything turns out!
**UPDATE**UPDATE**UPDATE**I called the Association of Bridal Consultants this morning to see if they could help me....it turns out that my consultant is NOT EVEN A MEMEBER!! She was a temporary memeber back in 2005, but never took any courses to become an actual member!! (even thought there logo is on her NEW website) The woman I talked to suggested that I find a lawyer and take her to court........whats my next step?
I can't believe a wedding coordinator is doing this to you. It truly helps in ruining the integrity that so many of us work so hard to uphold. I'm sorry Jennilee. I hope it all works out for you.
I would suggest you call your local better business bureau and report her in addition to calling a lawyer. See what they can do for you:
Also, I'm glad you called the ABC - did you mention that she has the logo on her website? If not you should tell them so they crack down on her for using their logo.
I'm sorry this happened to you! Good luck with everything
so sorry that all this has happened to you. you should definitely call the BBB and let them know. Call you local news and blast her on the news as well. You can save other brides for this nightmare.
I'm so sorry you don't have a recourse through ABC, but I'm glad you found out that she isn't a member. Just as an FYI to other brides, you can pay to be a member, but that doesn't mean you're a Professional Bridal Consultant or even active in the association. You earn the PBC title once you complete the coursework (tests, tests, and more tests) and then you're veiwable on the ABC website and being active meas attending the meetings, seminars and/or conferences.
As for accepting payments and paying vendors, I've been told that this places the coordinator/consultant in a bad position and to avoid it completely. All money should come from the client directly to the vendors. That way there are no questions.
I don't have any other advice other than please find someone you can trust for your wedding day. I wish I could be more help.
I actually called the BBB this morning and even though she is not a member, there has been a complaint about since we started using her. That makes me feel pretty crappy. I feel so used and cheated. We are kind of in limbo at the moment, waiting for return calls and weighing our options. Im crossing my fingers that she will settle with us amicably and that we wont have to waste time and money going to small claims court. We will see thought. I cant even get her on the phone on the moment and even when I do, Im not sure what to say!
I would also call your state attorney general and report her to the Consumer Fraud Bureau. They won't personally represent you, but will investigate her business practices.
Weighing in on a hot topic. You're down to the wire. First, can the associate florist that shares an office, do the job? She may have leverage with this woman, and be better able to get her to fork over the flower money that you already paid. Second, now you know that it's not you - you're dealing with a snake. No need to worry about upsetting her. I would decide if I even WANT her there the day of the wedding. Considering everything that she has done, she could do more damage than good. I hate to bring that up, but it is a reality. There may be someone that you haven't considered that will do a day-of consulting for a couple of hundred dollars. Many churches have women that are very experienced at this, but generally only do it at their own church. At your meeting with MisRepresentation (bring your fiance for moral support); inform her that you are aware that in addition to not fulfilling the terms of the contract and misrepresenting her services; a: she is not a member of ABC as advertised on her site and b: there are outstanding complaints about her at the BBB. This is fraud and therefore voids the contract. A letter from your attorney/friend would be perfect to present at this point. Let her know that if you receive a full refund, you will not press charges, nor take it to KXYZ-the local news station. Of course, this is assuming that you do not want her to be a part of the wedding day.
On the flip side, do you realize that you are going through all this with a man that cares, that is there with you through the whole thing, doing what he can to make it better. That right there is worth more than all the perfect wedding planners around! Best Regards!
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I have probably checked this thread 20 times today. I am so mad for you and any other brides who have had to deal with this woman.
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I second PrettyKatie; please keep us posted. Good luck!
agreed Prettykatie.
We are all behind you Jennilee. I don't think it would be wise to name your coordinator, especially if it goes to court because it could be labeled as slander, but I am curious how you found this woman?
If she advertises on any of the popular sites, blogs or forums, you should definitely contact them and let them know how unhappy you are that they are advertising her.
Thanks to everybody for letting me vent my frustration and giving me some great advice! So here is an update, yet again! I have done a lot of research over the past couple of days. Not only have I contacted a lawyer (an aquaintance of my FI) who has given us great advice, but I also have been in contact with the president of the Association of Bridal Consultants. He sent me an email today stating all the facts that I needed. I love that he wrote that she is illegally advertising herself and that they will begin legal proceedings if she does not correct this matter. I also contacted the Events coordinator at our venue and she says that she dislikes this woman and even had to yell at her at one point! Shes totally on our side and is getting back to me this afternoon with some replacement options. Whew! Our next step is to send a letter i have written stating our complaints and what we need to recieve to settle the matter, to her certified mail (along with a copy of the email from ABC)...and if she doesnt settle at that point, we will find a lawyer in her town (hopefully one that has sued her before) and start litigation. I really hope it wont go that far, since I have so much proof that she breached our contract. Just to let you know, my coordinator is on all of the wedding search engines such as decidido.com, festquest.com, 101weddingtips.com, referals.com,and gatheringguide.com JUST TO NAME A FEW. so make sure to check up on everybody even if they seem "sweet"! TO BE CONTINUED!!
Wow! I'm glad to hear the Event coordinator at your venue is on your side , I know you stated earlier that a wedding coordinator was required by them . I also agree that naming her on any site could be bad if anything did go to litigation. I'm REALLY REALLY glad this seems to be going much much better for you. Good luck with everything and keep up posted!
http://blueorchiddesigns.blogspot.com/2008/03/kickbacks-commissions-and-dirty-wedding.html
Whoa -- I know I'm a little late to the thread, but Jennilee I can't believe this! Man, planning a wedding is stressful enough without the drama of a corrupt coordinator. Fingers crossed that you're able to get all your money back and hire someone new!
Hello everyone! Im finally back with another update! After sending the letter to our now EX coordinator and not hearing anything for a couple of weeks, my FI and I decided to move on with the planning and deal with her later. We searched high and low and eventually booked a new florist and Day Of Coordinator. Its amazing what a difference it makes to hire a professional. Regardless of what has happened in the past, I am very happy and confident in the people we are working with now. Money is a serious issue at the moment due to loosing thousands to a scamming b$t%&, but we will work through that I hope. Anyway, today I was sitting at work, minding my own business when I recieved an email from THE EX! Needless to say it was full of accusations and excuses. Im trying really hard not to throw something as I think about it. Im trying to just focus on the last couple of sentences..and I quote "You will get your refund soon BE PATIENT! THANKS".
Yes Jennilee , thanks for the update. I' sorry you have to go through this!! I'm glad you have been able to find a new florist and Day Of Coordinator. I'm sure by this point they know your story and will work all the much harder to make sure your day goes just perfectly!Â
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It's 11:45pm and I can't sleep. I feel sick to my stomach and I think I might just spontaneously combust if I don't get this out. My fiancé and I hired a wedding coordinator months and months ago. We had also hired a decorator through her suggestion, but when we realized that our caterer could supply all our linens, chair, etc. we thought maybe all we really needed was a florist. Our coordinator jumped right in and offered her services. She would supply all the extra things we needed such as candles, arches, cocktail tables, etc. and a florist "on her team" would make our center pieces and flower arrangements. A week or so later I received an invoice via e-mail from her. I had not even seen a single flower arrangement yet, and here they were on an invoice for 200 bucks a pop! My fiancé and I had a phone conversation with her where she explained that her florist would not have the date available for long and that we needed to set the date now, but that she would add a clause to the invoice stating that any changes could be made when we met to pick the flowers (helpful note: our wedding is a destination wedding so a lot of our decisions have been made somewhat blindly). We stupidly trusted her when she said "trust me...I’m on your side blah blah blah". A month or so later, we met to see the first trial centerpieces. I actually posted about them before. They were the perfect shape and size, but the colors were off and it seemed as if somebody didn’t get the memo that stated what flowers I wanted. They were roses and carnations....not horrible, but not what I was looking for. I explained to her what I WAS looking for. We even went down to a flower shop so I could show her the right colors etc. THEN when I got home, I emailed her a bunch of pictures just to make sure she really knew. I even offered to send her photographs of what I wanted just in case her computer made the colors look different. I also had my fiancé (yes im a chicken) call her and discuss the fact that she was doing the flowers herself and that we didn’t think we should pay professional prices for armature work. We felt like making the flowers would add too much to her already full plate. We were worried about the coordination or the flowers suffering. She repeatedly assured us that she did not make the arrangement and that the florist on her team did. Fast forward another month. We met our coordinator at the rental shop that our caterer uses, so that we could finalize the linens and see the finished product....flowers and all. Our coordinator showed up an hour late...carrying the saddest excuse for a centerpiece that I had ever seen. Not only were the colors wrong, AGAIN, but the roses and a few stray ranunculus were dying and falling out of the floral foam. My finance even saw a bug crawl out of it! I immediately said that I was not happy. She tried to say that a weeks notice was not enough time to order fresh flowers (we changed our appointment back a week) and that this one was just so I could see the colors. We took ANOTHER trip down to her floral shop and we tried ONCE AGAIN to communicate on what colors I was looking for. At this point, I had a dress fitting to get to and didn’t feel like causing a scene, so I let my fiancé deal with her promises that the wedding flowers would not turn out like these ones. When I returned home...after having lots of time to stew over the situation, I sent an email to the coordinator letting her know that I was very unhappy and that I also had a feeling that she wasn’t being completely honest with us. I told her that I needed to meet her florist so that I could discuss my ideas with a professional. She responded very defensively AND unprofessionally. A few angry emails went back and forth....I cried....didn’t sleep....and then I received a call from a decorator. She said that she shared an office with our coordinator and that they usually work together. The only problem was that she sounded very confused and after a couple phone calls and emails, I realized that she had no idea who I was. Tonight I actually "accidentally" found out that she had never made any trial arrangements for us **I strongly suspect that our coordinator works with this woman, but was trying to go this one solo...and just used her name to cover it up** Now I’m at a loss of what to do. We are about 6 weeks away from the big day. We have already paid our coordinator, so firing her would be flushing money down the toilet. I don’t know what’s worse, wasting money or putting this important day in someone’s incompetent hands. I was willing to just let a lot go because I had no choice (our venue requires an outside coordinator), but now that I have a full view of what’s going on and know that she was blatantly lying to us, its hard for me to take it....or sleep. This woman is supposed to be making things easier. Not harder! What would you do if you were in my sad little shoes?