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wow! That is a very non-subtle way to go about things! I think maybe next time she says something along those lines you or your DH should say "we're not pregnant but we promise that we'll let you know when it happens, but we have no plans at the moment so no need to start knitting booties!" Light-heartedly of course :)
I was very open with my parents about TTC. During Thanksgiving and Christmas, they were not subtle in saying that they wanted another "set" of grandkids. My brother has three kids. We conceived around Thanksgiving, by Christmas my mom suspected that I'm pregnant. I told her before I left. She told my dad. They're super excited and want to tell everyone. I want to get to 12 weeks right now before we tell everyone.
I don't know about my inlaws. It'll be their first grandchild. I hope they're excited when they find out. We'll see on that one.
@cascadecherub: I'm sure your inlaws will be THRILLED! And congrats to you and your DH!
We do have a timeline in mind for when we might potentially start trying. But notice the "might" and "potentially" - in reality, when we get to that date, we may not start trying just yet. So I hesitate to tell anyone that that's when we'll start TTC because that may not be the time for us. Plus, I also get the feeling that telling people when we're starting to TTC might lead to lots of disappointment each time we have to answer the question, "So, are you pregnant yet?" with a no.
@Bubu82: I'm sure she's just excited, but hopefully she'll lay off you two for awhile. Otherwise, it can get really annoying really fast. My ex's mom would seriously want to have serious discussions about breastfeeding with me when I was like 19 and not married (and not pg!) and it just got exhausting after awhile. If she doesn't back off, I'd just ask hubby to mention to her that you're still deciding on a timeline, but it will be awhile, and you'll obviously share the good news when you have it :)
Yes LOL my FMIL has talked about it, but she has grandbabies already from Fiance's brother. And my parents want grandbabies and I'm the only candidate at this point. My brother didn't have any and he died in 2004, and my sister is gay and looked into artificial insemenation (sp?) and it's too expensive so they won't be having any. So that leaves me. And they have baaaaad grandbaby fever LOL
If your comfortable sharing your potential TTC timeline with your MIL, do it. Otherwise her asking you is going to get really old, really fast! I never realized how annoying people asking about TTC could be until I was in the position where people were asking me. I'm pretty open and told tons of people, and still found it annoying when whoever I was talking to jumped the gun and asked me before I could bring it up. Now, I will never ask anyone about their TTC plans without them first bringing it up!
Also annoying, "Are you pregnant?", when you are but aren't ready to tell...
@Bubu82: Honestly I think all parents/in laws are sorta like this. Traditionally a couple got married and the next step was to start a family. Believe me I got this to not from my parents or in laws before we were married but from family friends/friends. A lot of the older generation asked at our reception when we were going to start a family. It is just a natural/next step especially in the older generations eyes. For us little did a lot of guests know that I was actually already pregnant when we got married. ( We were engaged before I got pregnant)
Me!!! My MIL brings it up every. single. time. we see her! She is practically begging us to have a baby! We have told her we want to wait due to finances, school, and we want to have a home. Every thing we tell her she tells us isn;t necessary because "god will provide". She even tried scaring me into it by saying that "if I wait until I am older, I may not be able to have children and it will be too late and I will grow up to be alone". She is trying to convince me now that having children at a young age is better because when you are older, they are there to take care of you. She seriously needs to give it a rest. DH and I were planning on waiting 5 years but since she is pressuring us so much, we have decided to wait two years. The thing is, she already has another grandson!
My FMIL got me a baby name book... before we were engaged. My FI and I were a little confused :/
@JRL2012: Ha, whoa! That's some serious baby fever your FMIL has. At least mine waited until we were married.
@chastenet: Yeah, people should lay off and let you tell your news when you're ready. Also, that's a risky little game to play, because you never know if someone's extra weight is baby-related or cheeto-and-chocolate-chip-cookie-related.
@Tswife4ever: Hmm, you made me realize something else. She's also been making jokes about how old I am since the wedding (I'm 29). Those actually were really bugging me for awhile. Maybe she was trying to jumpstart my biological clock or something.
I get this from my sister all of the time and from my SIL. They want us to have a baby asap. We are actually going to start trying this cycle hopefully it happens with in the first few months of trying.
Wow she bought you maternity pants? Thats pushing it! My inlaws never mentioned babies at all until we told them we were expecting
Allow me to join you ladies. MIL has commented about our future kids since before we got married because she "teases" me about havings twins. She had five kids of her own and her house was practically a day care for cousins and neighbors growing up. Add to that her youngest graduates graduates high school and moves to college this year, and I think she is very much ready to add to the nest. My older SIL is trying right now, but they're having problems. My younger SIL talks about it, but I don't know how seriously because her husband is just finishing dental school and they're moving out of state this summer. But seriously, after the wedding, we got asked if we were going to have a honeymoon baby. And over the holidays, it was all, "When are you going to start?" It's so common, I just ignore it or go along with it anymore, but I do wish she'd give it a break sometimes. Anyway, just joining the chorus of you're not alone! :)
My non-wine drinking inlaws now give us wine every time we go over for dinner. I'm convinced it's because they want to see if I'll drink or not. At a recent family function, MIL grabbed the only baby in the room to hold and said something like, "I have to hold this baby because I have no grandchildren of my own yet". It's very sweet, but we finally got them to stop bugging us about having kids, because it was making me crazy. What if we did get preganant, and something awful happened? Or what if we were having problems getting pregnant? The pressure they were putting on us was making it worse, so finally DH had a chat with them and clued them in on the fact that we are trying. That has shut them up (for now). :)
But maternity pants? That's not even funny.
My FIL was on the baby train, and even sat DH down to discuss "timing" to get a boy (I'm so glad I wasn't there for that conversation) because FIL said that if he didn't push DH to start a family, DH would never get around to it. How funny is that?!? Luckily, I was never on the receiving end of those conversations! And this isn't the first grandbaby for FIL - DH's sister has a little boy that's only 16 months old.
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My MIL is the last person in the world I would have expected to get baby fever. She just doesn't strike me as the type. However, since the wedding, she seems to have developed a case of it. So far, she has:
WTF? I know I've gained a little weight, but it does not look at ALL like a baby belly. And no, I'm not pregnant, nor are we trying right now.
It's actually kind of sweet, but sheesh, lady, we just got married three months ago! I think it's because she doesn't have any grandkids yet. DH is her only biological child, and her stepkids don't have any children yet. My mom, on the other hand, already has two grandkids, and she hasn't said a peep about babies, other than when I bring it up myself.
Anyone else out there have in-laws with baby fever?