Post # 1
Ok have u ever thought…hmm u pay all this money on food, decor, flowers and guests in general for YOUR special day and all it is is going to BREAK ur bank!!! Im saying we pay all this $$$ for guests to enjoy our day, when in all actuality the guests should be paying us a cover charge to attend…If u think about it all they do is enjoy the day on ur expense…hmm sounds like we (the bridal couple) are club owners…i have seen and heard of ppl paying wat it costs to put a down payment on a house on their wedding when at the end of the day the food is gone, ppl complaining and u and ur new husband are in debt LOL…
I myself have planned a DW mainly because of the stress of planning my wedding and while planning the DW, Ive found out its a lot cheaper….plus doing a DW, u realize who ur REAL friends are and how much $$$ u are worth to them…Im just saying. But by doing a DW, I get to tell everyone who wont be there how wonderful it was and show them all the wonderful pics in the Bahamas…Plus how many ppl u know get to say “I got married in the Bahamas”
Just a Penny for Ur Thoughts
Post # 3
The people who spend that much on a wedding choose to do so, just as many people spend far less and have lovely days. They’re your guests! Look up the definition of the word — one who receives hospitality. Be hospitable! Also, they are spending money on gifts and travel to be there to celebrate with you. They don’t owe you anything, and the wedding probably doesn’t immediately affect their lives. It’s supposed to be a joyous celebration for everyone. If you’re going to be cranky about inviting your loved ones to have a good time IN YOUR HONOR, don’t bother inviting them.
… my two cents …
Post # 4
i second amaryllis on this one, its supposed to be a joyous occasion, everyone situation is different and everyone would like to celebrate it their own way, the point it to never regret it and look back on it with fond memories, if a DW is right for you its right for you but maybe not someone else and you cant judge your friends on who comes and who doesnt, some people simply cant book the time off work and or simply cant afford it or they dont have a babysitter
Post # 5
i can agree with u both to an extent…it is a poll! me and some co-workers were just discussing this very topic and I thought I would poll it. Yes i believe ppl do wat they want to do. If its a small inexpensive wedding or a lavish big wedding, thats on them, I completely understand. I personally know that ppl who spend lavish amounts on their wedding the next month are saying the couldnt pay their mortgage..Ive also seen that brides are still having family members help pay for their wedding and thats all good. Personally as I stated before alot of my fam and friends are mad b/c were having a DW, but as I told them, u all are more than welcome to come. I think a DW is romantic and very intimate. Im not a person whom likes alot of attention.
but thanks for ur comments
Post # 6
Are you 12? Learn how to type like an adult!
Don’t want to pay to plan and put on a wedding, head to city hall, done and done! Destinations wedding can sometimes exclude some people and has nothing to do with who your “REAL” friends are as you state -I understand why some family and friends are mad!
Post # 7
I’m not trying to knock DWs, but please don’t be too hard on guests who can’t make it. I wasn’t able to attend my cousin’s wedding beacuse it was the week I had finals, and some things you just can’t miss! Also, some of your friends might not be able to afford a week off of work plus the cost of attending, it doesn’t mean that they don’t value you as a friend!
Post # 8
Destination Weddings are really hard to attend. Guests can end up spending a ton of money to attend and if their schedule/budget don’t permit them to attend it doesn’t mean they aren’t real friends to you.
I do not think a wedding should have a “cover charge” but I do think people should think and plan wisely for their wedding. Couples should not be going into debt to have a wedding. Also, if you can’t afford so many people to attend then you have to realize that life is tough and cut the guest list down.
Post # 9
“who your real friends are and how much $$$ you are worth to them” seriously? another way of estimating true friendship credentials could be to calculate whether your guests gifts adequately offset the cost of the meal/venue hire and decorations.
Post # 10
@RingPup: Disagreeing with someone’s opinion is one thing, insulting them is quite another. Please re-familiarize yourself with WeddingBee’s posting guidelines, which prohibit personal attacks and snarkiness!
Post # 11
I am guessing this thread is going to explode and I am guessing that was the intentiom of the OP.
Post # 12
I feel like other people have paid for me to eat at their wedding or will in the future, so I’m just returning the favor. And they probably spent a lot more than I did.
Post # 13
@mspride11: I totally understand why you put this poll out there. It does seem like we shell out so much money just to put on a “decent” wedding, let alone a wedding that people will remember!
However, I voted “no” because the reception is still just a party, and it kind of sounds weird to me to make my friends pay to hang out with me. I have a lot of friends who graduated college the last couple years and are still struggling to find a job in this economy and already repaying their student loans. I want those friends to be able to share my joy as much as the rest of my friends.
@Everyone: If someone invited me to a DW, a lot of stars would have to fall into place for me to be able to attend: Both me and my new husband would be able and willing to burn some of our paid vacation days (and I only get two weeks per year so those days are precious to me), or we’d be willing to take unpaid vacation days and budget for the loss of income incurred, we’d have some extra cash sitting around for airfare and other travel expenses, and we’d have nothing else going on for a solid block of days around the time the wedding is taking place. At least at this point in my life, those stars aren’t aligning anytime soon, so if anyone short of my sister or brother has a DW, I’ll have to sadly decline their invitation.
Post # 14
Agree with Mrs.Kesslertobe–appears to be a troll post. But OP, if you want the answer to your questions:
“Ok have u ever thought… (etc. etc.)”
No, I have never thought any of the things that you are thinking.
Post # 16
The thought has crossed my mind. And I’ve said that as a joke to my mom as I signed a big deposit check. But I would never do something like that, because the costs incurred because of the wedding are all choices my fiance and I have made based on what we can afford and what we’re willing to spend.