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posted 5 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
1891 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I wouldn’t worry too much about it if I were you.  Some people are just tactless and say inappropriate things–I think they feel better when they know they’ve given a little jab at someone else?  Hopefully you and your FI can talk about it after he says these things and just shake your heads at the stuff he says.  (Source: I have certain in-laws who act this way too.  DH assures me they’ve always acted like this and it’s just how they are.)

Post # 4
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

The things you listed sound more like that is just his personality and him voicing his opinions rather than him not liking you. I dont think it is an indication that he doesn’t like you.

If he is more of a casual person, then maybe wear jeans when you visit them next? He may have a hard time relating to you if you are much more dressed up than they are. My MIL is an older casual, woman from a small town. When I isit, I don’t typically wear a lot of jewelry and usually have jeans and t-shirts to hang out in. I know it makes her feel like she can relate to me and makes her more cofortable with me. 

Take the things he says with a grain of salt. He may not be sensitive to what you are feeling  and he just sounds like an opinionated old man imo.

Post # 5
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

Those things sound pretty normal to me. Most the older people in my family say the same type of stuff. I wouldn’t think he didn’t like you based off of that. Sounds like a typical semi-crotchety older guy.

I would just respond with “you should really wear more sweaters,” etc. Just give it back.

Post # 6
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Your in-laws do not have to love you and you don’t have to love them. Be polite, be nice when you visit and stop worrying what about they think. My FSILs used to whisper like crazy about me whenever I was around. It didn’t bother me a bit. It bothered my FH and my FMIL but I told them to relax as I could care less and eventually the wenches stopped as they realized it didn’t concern me in the least.

No one can please every body! Concentrate on creating your OWN family’s happiness!

Post # 7
Member
5968 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Uhhh, sounds like this guy just lacks the ability to express himself without sounding like an asshole…all of these comments are probably par for the course for this guy and your not being singled out at all….I sincerely wouldn’t give it another thought, as for your sister in law, she probably is nit-picking your stuff too, and there’s just nothing more exhilirating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?  What a sad, small person she is, step over her and never look back.   And what kind of ingrates can’t even give their own son a wedding gift?  Was their company such a treat?  Trust me, wasting your time worrying about these people is folly, they probably don’t like you, because their son has figured out what people are supposed to be like, and prefers the company of them instead. Move on, and when you are around them, just rise above that petty garbage, they can scramble around in the trenches if they want to, you won’t sully your nice shoes Wink

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