Post # 1
ok it is 2 months until my wedding and well i sent the invites out. Where can i begin on this subject. Lately i am have been getting more and more sad. My mom died 2 years ago of a massive stroke. I woke up yesterday morning sad. I know my mom is gone ladies but i keep thinking mom is on a vaca and will be coming home for the wedding in 2 months. Im 22 and i want my mommy. I want to just call her and tell her what is going on with the wedding and how much i miss her . I know she will be there on the wedding day, i just want to see her. Its so frustating sometimes.
My side of the family lets just say we are not a big happy family. I do not talk to my father and i sent an invite to my grandma and my aunt from my dads side and there is no reply to it at all or the bridal shower. I am really starting to think that they wont come. My bridal shower soon to be mother in law is throwing it for me and well there will be basically no one from my side of the family coming to it. It kind of hurts I just feel like they dont care and it would be nice to have my grandmas there. You only get married once. My grandma on my moms side doesnt want to come because she has social anixous problems i guess. I feel like if my mom was alive that everyone on my side of the familywould be around for the wedding and shower. Maybe i am just getting emotional about the wedding. If someone isnt going to come i wish they would just reply back and say no im not coming.
Post # 3
I know how you feel. Not only are both my parents deceased but my daughter and only child died unexpectedly a few years ago. Oh how she would have LOVED helping me to plan the wedding, she was so much more girly than me and she would have had a ball with all of this. I am glad you know she will be there on your wedding day because she definitely will be. There will be a moment when you feel a gentle touch or see a special ray of light and you will know she is with you. Hang in there and make her proud. You can do this.
Post # 4
*HUGS* I am so, so sorry for your loss, and the pain you are feeling. =( I would want my mother, too.
Post # 5
your post brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry you are feeling neglected by your family on top of everything else. The one thnig that has helped me is knowing I am creating a new family, one that will always love and be by my side no matter what. As far as your mom, time will only make it better. Im glad you know she will be with you on your wedding, she will probably be walking right beside you as you go down the aisle, giving you strength. <3
Post # 6
I just wanted to send ((((Hugs)))), even though your mom can’t be there with you in person, she WILL be there with you watching over you and sending all of her love.
Post # 7
I’m so sorry, **hugs**. But you have to know your mom would and is happy for you. And she is probably thinking about you as much as you are thinking of her:)
Post # 8
I know what you’re going through. Both of my parents are gone, and my brother just died 3 weeks ago tomorrow. He was supposed to walk me down the aisle. So, I’m not going to say that they’re there in spirit, because I know how painful the whole thing is, not having them there. All I can say is to take some solice in the fact that your mom would be very proud of her little girl on the biggest day of her life. Include her in the festivities by putting her picture up at the table with the card box. I’m getting really pretty roses with baby’s breath and such made up for my parents, my brother and my fiances brother as well. Just know that there are others who feel your pain and would give you a hug if we could!
Post # 9
(((Hugs))) All I can say is I know what you are going through. I lost my mom over 5 years ago and it has been really hard planning a wedding without her. Remember your mom and focus on your family that will be there with you to celebrate.
Post # 10
Oh my gosh, I feel for you. My mom died 9 years ago but i still get sadder as we get closer to the wedding. My shower is this Saturday and none of it feels real without her. But I am just impressed with everyone on this board and how much you all have survived through such adversity. I really admire you all.
Equinegirl — you are very young and it’s so natural to want your mommy. I want mine and I’m probably an old fogey compared to most of you (I’m 35)! Your mom is watching over you and as long as your fiance is good to you, and makes you happy, I’m sure she would not want you to do anything but have a wonderful wedding.
Have you ever gone to any support groups? I found that very helpful. I’m sure right now you probably don’t have much free time, but I would also check out the book "Motherless Daughters" by Hope Edelman. I found it to be very helpful.
Good luck, God bless, and hang in there.
Post # 11
I’m so sorry equinegirl, I can relate because I lost my dad several years ago. Sometimes I still get really weepy, especially with the wedding coming up so soon. There isn’t anything anyone can do or say to make the pain go away, it’s like walking through fire. Sometimes you just need to have a good, long cry and then try to move foreward. Be gentle with yourself!
Post # 12
thanks everyone for the hugs. Im sorry that you dont have your moms or people that are close to you, i know how you feel. I wish i could all give you hugs 🙂 . I feel like an oprhan sometimes because my mom is gone and my dad well i dont have a relationship with him and dont talk to him. I had a long cry on monday and a long nap and i feel better now.
JGKANE, I will have to read that book. It doesnt help that my family doesnt like to talk about my mom and my grandma tells me that is a sin to miss my mom and talk about her and we should just let her rest, It is kind of frustating.
Post # 13
I’m so sorry you’re having such a hard time-HUGS.
It’s okay to miss your mom–you have to tell yourself that. But, it also sounds like you might be able to find some comfort with the new side of your family, your FH’s family. Your Future Mother-In-Law is throwing you a shower, right? Have you thought about sitting down and talking to her (or calling her), and telling her how sad you are that your mom isn’t here to help you plan your wedding, and how much you appreciate her throwing you a shower since your mom isn’t with you any more? I don’t know any mom in the world that wouldn’t warm to such a talk. It might be worth a shot.