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I am sorry you are going through this. I know it must be awful for you. From what you have written, it seems like he is very controlling. If I were you, I would leave and get a lawyer. Do not sign anything over to him. Let the lawyer handle everything. If you don't have anywhere to go and he is willing to leave, let him.
I agree with noritake. This is a controlling and emotionally abusive relationship and if you can leave, do it NOW. You don't deserve to be treated this way.
The sadest part is i love him, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!!! But this behaviour has pushed me over the edge, where i look at him with discuss. I explained to him that his wording towards others are too harsh for a proper coversation. You dont call me an efen idio. Who says that to the person you love. Why do you call her brother down and say hes incompitant to raise his child or take care of his wifes car. Instead my HB will displine his brothers kid and call his brother a no brain f loser and idiot. Infront of fmaily memebers and the kids and his wife. I have the gutts to call him out on it cause its got to stop. Do i leave this marriage that has been 5 months and let him throw his hands up. Or do i work through it and as he says SUCK IT UP PRINCESS. Well I am not signing a thing. As for living with mommy, you girls are right then GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Live there and have fun. Get the same treatment you get here, fed every day clothes folded house clean erronds for you and your slippers at the door. I love you two, thanks for ruining my night.
i would leave. as fast as you can. everyone deserves better then that and he doesnt seem like he respects you or your family. and that is not love. ive been there and done that and got out of it. follow your gut, not the "i used to love this guy" feeling. people change and its not always for the best.
I agree with other posters. You need to do what is right for you. Like you said, you love him, but what is important to realise is that love is not everything. Love isn't what should be keeping you there. Love is great when it is hand in hand with respect, trust, loyalty, integrity, etc. But what love is the only thing there and none of those other things exist then it really is time to take a step back and look at the bigger picture.
NOBODY has the right to treat you like shit. We ALL have the right to feel safe and to be loved, and nobody should settle for anything less.
Love will find you again. And it will probably come hand in hand with trust, respect and friendship. always remember that. Taking the step to stand up for what you deserve can be hard. It certainly won't be easy, but it will make you a stronger person in the long run.
Best of luck xo
So its morning, and we sat up all night talking about respect. This is after the fact that he tried to make me sign everything over. Acting like a baby running to mommy. That is not a commited relationship. I got into this marriage cause i have never found someone who has such a big heart, he acts just like my father. I think i picked him cause of this feature, i felt really close to him. his behavour doesnt give him the right to treat other people with lesser money or different race with disrespect. I wont allow it, my kids when we have them i will not have them speak to people or act rudly to others because of race. So he apologized for his actions with his brother, and his actions towards me. He also said that he will stop the rude comments towards his brother and will listen to me without blowing it over board. I said to him I only do this cause i am concerned, about respect and boundries. I want to see a good relationship with his brother. We are not teenagers, and the teasing has got to stop. Even if he thinks its funny because he hurts his brother. His brother is going bald and he makes fun, well its a part of life. Imagine if i was going bald, and my HB says look at my wifes hair she has a bald spot. I would lose it, so his brother feels the same.
Put a lawyer on retainer and have them work out any of the paperwork and interactions - you need OUT! It'll be worth the money.
From this post and some of your others, outside of all the family drama (which is terrible) – honestly, I think the way your husband treats you is terrible. You’ve said he has thrown your clean, folded laundry to the ground, tries to force you to sign documents you don’t want to sign, threatens to leave you/the house, calls you names, etc.
That isn’t how to treat people you love and respect. He’s a bully. From what you said, this is also how he treats his family members – this is HIM. This is how he interacts with the people in this life. 99.9% of the time, people don't change. Especially not if they don't want to change - but are just doing it to please others.
I know sometimes you can be soooooo in love with someone you want to ignore their fauults – but if your best friend, or sister said that their husband did these things to them, what advice would you give them?
Good luck, I think you are in a very tough spot, and I hope it all works out for the best, for YOU.
Will HE/can you tell him you are staying in your home, and get him to move out? Don't sign anything and DO get yourself a lawyer like the other posters said. I would be worried about things escalating and him physically abusing you! You deserve better! Good luck, and keep us posted with how you are doing. We care about you and your happiness and your life!
He will never hit me, there are times when maybe the thought of him hitting me would push me over the edge with sickness. Yea as upset as i am about this issue that happened a while back pissed me off. I am not ready to leave and i want to stay with him. Sometimes things are said and i am truely hurt but leaving is not the answer.
Leaving may not be the answer, but it definitely should be an option. This is not a healthy relationship.
If my husband even thought to call me a b**** or any other curse word in the book, he'd be shot and I do mean SHOT! No woman deserves to be called an ugly and hurtful name! Where did he learn to treat a woman?????!!! As for his brother, they are blood and sometimes blood is thicker than water. I have a woman in the family (luckily she's no realationship to me) that has 4 kids by 3 different fathers. She's young and I think she's just a fool! But I don't call her names like that!
Seriously! These are RED RED FLAGS! Get out while you can! 5 months is better than 5 years of living like this. I have another question. Did he do any of this before you married? During the dating part of your relationship???? Has this just started when you all married?
You need to figure out what you want to do. I'm sorry and i dont want to be harsh here, but your coming on this board talking horribly about your husband and granted we dont know what goes on in your relationship saying that he is forcing you to sign things and calling you names and being a complete and utter a**hole but yet you sit here and say you want to stay with him. It's not healthy to be with someone who verbally abuses you and is completely aggressive.
People like him will always go and apologize and say they're sorry so you wont nag them and so that they can keep controlling you. I dont understand. You need to be strong and decide whether couple couinseling is good idea; it might just diffuse his aggression towards you.
But just a piece of mind, if he's like this on the regular, what makes you think he won't hit you when he's mad. Remember that we never fully "know" a person or what they are capable of.
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I want to stay he wants me to go, what do i do. He was going to move to his moms. He wants me to leave and if i dont hes going to leave. So i dont then he doesnt either. Then acts like nothing happened, i had a long shower to cry my eyes out. I just know i am not going to get respect. Now i write this blog and all i want to do is freak out at him, while he sits there just smiling like everything is ok. He was forcing me to sign everything to him and he was going to leave. SOME MARRIAGE THIS IS!!!! Arrrrgggggggggggggg, more like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!