I was totally mommy judged, but I’m not a mother…

posted 2 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
Member
2052 posts
Buzzing bee

I get this all the time with my nieces, cause I tend to let them do more things because I’m the aunt not the mom.

Yesterday we were at an amusement park and I bought them a bottle of soda to share. The dirty looks you get when people see a kid walking around with a soda is amazing, as if no one ever has let their kid have soda.

Not to mention we’re at an amusement park, the perfect place for them to run out that energy a soda will give them

Post # 3
Member
4641 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I bought myself a sandwich the other day and my friends daughter a cookie.

Some rude woman behind me told me to buy my child a proper meal instead of subduing her with sugar. Little did she know my friend was feeding her baby, and her daughter wanted to come with me to get a sandwich. She was going to pick out a sandwich with her mom when she was done feeding her son. The cookie was cute so I bought it for her. The horror.

I told her when strangers make assumptions about other strangers they’re more often than not wrong. She apologized and when my friends daughter tore off to show her mom the cookie I told her to go fuck herself and mind her own business.

I hate strangers with big mouths.

Post # 4
Member
7271 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

I’m sure people judge me when I let my baby watch Baby Einstein puppets or use FaceTime to talk to her dad/grandparents. Whatever, I don’t care. She’s happy and is perfectly capable of playing with toys and interacting with people. Sometimes it’s the best way to get her to calm down.

I’ve been judged when people find out that I bedshare with my baby. It wasn’t really my choice, she wouldn’t sleep on her own from day one. It was just the best way I found to allow all of us to sleep at all. People have had no trouble telling me that I have “spoiled” her. What a nice thing to say about a 10 month old baby.

I know you were asking about being judged when you’re not a mom, but to me it’s the same thing if they’re assuming you’re the parent.

Post # 6
Member
3045 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

When I was about 12 or 13 and looked a bit older, I totally got mommy judged when I was at a carnival with my toddler cousin. We were in a lineup together (small park, and our parents totally trusted me so we had no supervising adults in sight) and she wanted me to dance and sing wih her because she was getting bored. The only problem was that her favourite song for me to dance with her to was this trumpet melody that ends when everyone shouts, “tequila!” So to get me to dance she kept saying “tequila, tequila!” as she wiggled her butt in a manner which today would be called twerking and I sure as hell didn’t teach her.  

This woman behind us in lineup with her kid clutched her precious child closer and GLARED at me like it was obvious that my drunken teenage ass had got knocked up and she was worried I would have alcoholic fumes, or something. it’s a good thing cell phones were not too common then, or else I’m sure she may have whipped one out to call Protective Services!

Post # 7
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

ilovebacon:  All the time. I’m a nanny. I watch my FSIL’s kids & her FMIL is always like second guessing what I’m doing even though she’s had 1 son. I’ve taken care of a tooon of kids since I was 13 & they’re all perfectly, healthy, normal functioning people. I’m just always like I know what I’m doing lady. She drives everyone nuts though, not just me.

Post # 8
Member
2205 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I sometimes babysit my cousins, and if we go out in public, I used to be judged for being too young to have kids. Ok, I understand that having kids early is tough, but that doesn’t necessarily make someone a bad parents, and oh yeah, I’m not their mom.

Post # 10
Member
7271 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

ilovebacon:  unfortunately, babies don’t read the books that say they need to sleep on their backs only lol.

Post # 11
Member
4641 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

ilovebacon:  HA! Most times I’m able to hold back but, the kid went back to her mom to show her the cookie so I had the perfect moment. I’d have kicked myself all day if I wasn’t able to say anything.

If you want to judge strangers, do it silently.. Because you’re more often than not, wrong and end up looking like an idiot.

Post # 12
Member
1836 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

truthfully i judge adults and children alike who are on their phones while out to eat at a restaurant. adults should be able to carry a conversation and eat without needing screen time and they should be teaching their children the same habits.

at home my husband and i often eat in front of the tv and are screwing around on our phones (which i am well aware of and it bothers me… working on it), but when we go out it is a special occasion and absolutely should be treated like such.

Post # 13
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

 

Cory_loves_this_girl:  My son would not sleep on his back.  I co-slept with him at least 6 months.  He’s now 11 and hasn’t slept with me since then!  They definitely move to their own beds sooner rather than later.

Post # 14
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I only bring out the electronics if the wiat is exceptionally long.  Little kids eventually do get bored and restless.  Usually, though, I just make my kids talk to me or color. 

Post # 15
Member
866 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Haha i love all these stories! this totally happened to me a few weeks ago. My sister and I took our step niece to the fair and took turns taking her on rides. It was super hot out and so wore cut offs and a t-shirt which I’m sure played into this. Anyway we are in line for the slides and the ride operator (some lady) looks us up and down and is like umm how old Is she? I tell her three. She was like well how old are you? I tell her 27. She’s like oh cause we can’t let kids on the ride if they aren’t with an adult but I guess your ok, take it as a compliment. I wanted to punch her I know I look young but in no way do I look younger than 18, and obviously I knew what she was getting at With her comments. Even if she was my kid I’m old enough to have one and have a giant rock on my hand. I made a point of flashing it in her face before we got on. 

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