I wasn't invited to FI's friend's wedding..do we invite his wife?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should we invite friend's wife?
    Nope. You have to limit your list too. It's only fair! : (74 votes)
    25 %
    Yes, it's the right thing to do : (209 votes)
    70 %
    Other (explain) : (17 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    42166 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @khaleesi:  Just because they made an error in etiquette, doesn’t mean you should.

    As our mothers used to say “Two wrongs don’t make a right.”

    You already know the answer to your question.

    Post # 5
    595 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Unfortunately, you either have to invite both or nither. I would be temped to not invite her niether considering the situation. 


    Post # 6
    3589 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    Personally, I wouldn’t invite either of them and would’ve ditched the friendship immediately when I realized everyone else’s SO was invited but mine.  

    Anyone who treats my SO badly can kiss my ass.

    Post # 7
    2535 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Two wrongs don’t make a right-

    Also … there is a difference between FI and Wife- FI is ALMOST one unit… but Husband and Wife ARE one unit….

    Gosh that sounds awful and in a perfect world would be able to not even have to worry about it but someitmes there are “cuts”.


    the other SO’s that got invited- Married or not yet?

    Also did they know the bride?

    Have you ever offended the friend? etc

    Don’t worry about it. Be the bigger person.

    Post # 8
    3249 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    If you’re inviting couples, you’re inviting couples.  Simple as that.

    Post # 9
    207 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I think you should invite her, it will probably make them feel quite bad that they both received and invite to yours but you didnt to theirs.

    I’m sure when you see her she will have more of an explaination as to why they couldnt invite you to their wedding.


    @julies1949:  is correct, two wrongs don’t make a right.


    You have a chance to be the bigger person.

    Post # 10
    1157 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Yup, either both or neither. From the information you’ve given, I would say neither. 

    Post # 12
    5697 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    That depends on if you want to be petty or not. 

    Post # 13
    11772 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Man, I wouldn’t want to invite either of them! But to be gracefu (and the bigger person), it’s all or nothing.

    Post # 14
    3255 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Psssh I don’t think I’d invite either. How rude of them!

    Post # 15
    9137 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    Be classy and invite them both, she’s his wife and spouses always get an invite. Maybe since you never met her your husband’s friend didn’t argue very hard to include you since you weren’t married yet. With a guest list of 200 I’m sure there were a few people who ended up cut because the bride and or groom didn’t want to waste an invite on a stranger.

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