(Closed) I wasn’t really planning on inviting them, but okay…

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

If they just came from planning a wedding, do you think they would understand not receiving an invite? :

Or do you think maybe letting your uncle know that there is a cap on the guest list (you don’t have to say whose cap) might help for future wedding discussion?

Post # 4
Member
46157 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Speak to your uncle. Make sure he is aware that you are planning a small wedding and won’t be able to accomodate everyone you would like to invite.

Request his help in not making comments that would lead people to believe they are going to be invited.

Post # 5
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Agree with speaking to uncle as PPs said. And then don’t invite them. Let your uncle know its a small wedding so if they make a comment to them, he can inform them its small and intimate.

Post # 6
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I wouldn’t worry about it. People say things like that all the time without thinking first. If that family just planned their daughter’s wedding (and you were on the b-list), they should be more than understanding.

If someone ever asks, just say you’re having a small, intimate wedding. That’s code for- don’t expect an invite lol

I would maybe mention that to your uncle, in a polite way, that you don’t want to hurt people’s feelings by making it seem they are invited when you’re having a small wedding and will most likely not be able to invite them.

Post # 7
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I definately agree with the other bees. Tell your Uncle that the guest list is full for the venue, and that they are on your B list, but you can’t say for sure whether they will get an invite. Just tell him that there is literally nothing you can do.

If you want something to make you laugh, I’ll share a similar story with you. I logged on to facebook the day after I announced my date to everyone and I had an event invite. Guess what it was for? MY WEDDING. A friend had created an event on facebook, make it public, and let people RSVP too it.

Hope that makes you feel better. 🙂 

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