Post # 1
I’ve been feeling pretty bummed lately while being on the boards. I wish I could join all the bees and share my updates, invites, etc. I have nothing because well – there really isn’t a wedding. I have no idea what’s going on. We are less than 7 months out and no one is talking about anything. I have cried over this so many times, but no one seems to care. I always get the “it’ll work out” speech. It just really blows.
I sit here and read posts where I wish I had an opportunity to do the things you all get to do. I want to be a bridezilla (not really WANT, but I think you get what I mean). I want to be able to post pictures of a bridal shower. I want to share everything and anything. Instead I’m just a member who congratulates and gets excited for all the bees.
I hate to always post about this, but it just bothers me more and more as the days inch closer. I am so jealous of everyone and their experience. Mine has been so shitty and I really wish we could turn back time and start all over again. Postponing the wedding isn’t really an option for either of us. We have been through so much that we can’t wait for it to be over with. What an experience this has been.
I do want to thank those who have been extremely supportive of me – especially secondchances. She’s been lovely and checking in on how I’m doing when she finds the time.
I don’t want to leave the boards because I feel like I’ve been so many “friends” from here and I love talking with you gals. But sometimes I just leave feeling empty and depressed.
I wish everyone the best of luck though with everything they’re planning and in their future. You’re all awesome.
Post # 3
Aww, I personally love having you around on the boards. I know what you mean about being excited for and congratulating all of the Bees but not having any updates to share, I’m not planning a wedding so I feel like that sometimes too. Sending lots and lots (and lots!) of hugs your way.
Post # 4
I’m over 2 years out, and I’m still here, so there is definitely a place for you here, regardless of your stage in life. Is there a possibility for you and the Fiance to say F it, and just run off somewhere and elope? Just a suggestion, but I hope things start looking up for you ((HUGS))
Post # 5
@MissBoPeep: Thank you. The feeling is mutual. i wish you the best of luck though. Your day will come soon!
@MrsSl82be: Well, we were just going to elope and go on our honeymoon. Even the JOP was fine by us. His mother said something not too long ago that she didn’t want it to be like that though. The problem was that there were rifts between him and his parents (more like Fiance and his father). It caused us to spend everything we had saved up and more to move out of the house and never recovered from that. It was their suggestion to live with them until we were settled and they would help pay for wedding. It just still really upsets me til this day. Anyways, I’m digressing – she called up to say we could do everything at her house. No one has spoken up it since. I have no idea what to do, think, or say anymore. Every time Fiance talks to his mom – she talks about not having any money or is spending a ton of money on silly things. Sigh. Sorry for venting.
Post # 6
We are going to elope on our honeymoon too. Not sure when though. Last week, I just undid the wedding which was scheduled for July (4 months away). Hang in there!
Post # 7
Oh honey I’m so sorry you are feeling like that sending you tons of hugs. You know sometimes I envy you because you don’t have ALL the stress that comes with planning everything but at the same time I so wish you could experience it as well. Hang in there and I’m here for you if you need an ear to listen. Btw I’m sooooo sending u an invite for my bridal shower! :-p so you better get ready to come to a Parisian fete! Love ya girl xoox
Post # 8
@sienna76: Thank you! Good luck with yours!
@couawilou: You’re so sweet. I totally wish I could go! That would be super.
Post # 9
@Rouquine: I don’t know the whole back story, but I feel like if his parents are the ones who don’t want you to elope, they need to make up their minds. It’s really unfair to you to be in this wedding limbo- can Fiance figure out if they’re serious about hosting/paying and if they aren’t you guys should be able to plan your elopement. I’m sorry you’re going through this, I hope it works out for you!
Post # 10
@anchors_away: I asked him to talk to his mom, but he hasn’t yet. I’m not sure why. I’ll have to talk to him this weekend.
Post # 11
Long post for you, but hope my story helps in some way.
I can relate to being frustrated with everyone asking about the wedding planning when infact, there are no real plans. My Fiance proposed 5 yrs ago. Yes, 5 yrs. He is a Dr. and proprosed Easter morning. He made an Easter basket for me and hid it in an egg. So cute!! I had no idea that he bought a ring, and was really surprised that he proposed. He wanted to wait atleast one year for the wedding after graduation.
Fast forward —now “FINALLY” we are getting married –in two months! “Finally” that’s all that comes out of everyone’s mouths. It is as funny as it is annoying. We waited for finacial reasons. Dr.’s are very poor right out of college, and we took the money we saved for a wedding and opened up his own practice. Money had been tight and we knew that we could never enjoy a wedding that we could not afford. Both of our fathers have passed, and our mothers are not in a place where they can, nor would we ask, for them to contribute financially to our wedding. So we waited. We thought of several ways to get married –elope by ourselves vs small wedding… We knew that if we eloped that we would be so happy that we would want to celebrate with friends. I almost wish I had it in me to elope and just be happy with that. I envy those who can –it is very romantic, but not for me.
So for five years of engagement, people have made remarks that I should ditch him, old men have told me that if he doesn’t marry me then they will, & I had to endure remarks asking what is wrong with our relationship (so rude) while remaining professional. Oy. I work with patients that I see on a routine basis and would be asked about my wedding planning for sooo long several x a day. Patients are now getting so elated for me that they are bringing in presents!! Things are turning around —for them. They are now happy and not worried about me. lol My friends and family completely understood, and love Fiance, so atleast I wasn’t asked about it by them.
We are and have been secure with our relationship, but it was tough on us and we went through rough patches because we were not where we wanted to be in our lives –financially stable, starting a family, etc. Atleast we have a house. I was so over looking at wedding things that I displaced myself from it and became a little depressed myself. As soon as the date was set and book I was happy, but a little numb to the wedding stuff. However, when I bought my dress the wedding bug hit me. Then I have become addicted to the bee. 🙂
I am hopeful for you and have a little understanding about your circumstance. Positive thoughts sent your way. It seems like there is just a rough patch, and most people should give the wedding planning questions a rest because you circumstance is totally relatable. Finances are why couples wait so long to get married. Cheers to the wedding bug biting you again soon, and for your plans to be back on track.
Post # 12
@Rouquine: gosh, I’m sorry! Leading up to our decision to elope I was feeling exactly the same way so I empathize with you.
Stay on the boards! I like seeing your little pumpkin pie icon pop up on a thread!
Post # 13
@frenchie427: Thank you for sharing your story. I can only imagine how tough it’s been for you. I’ve been going through this for about 1.5 years now so I can’t imagine 5! (hugs) Early congrats on your wedding.
@MrsElopement: Thank you. It’s a tough decision. It’s just a roller coaster of emotions!
Post # 14
@Rouquine: even if you did ultimately decide to elope there are excitments or DIY things you could do along the way. I mean JuniperSage made eloping sound like an effing dream! I still am DIYing stuff and get excited over things like booking the hotel or deciding the sites we will see.
Post # 16
@Rouquine: I love having you around, and I’m sad that you’re sad. You always have such good input and I find you to be an asset here!
I hope that you can figure everything out soon.