Post # 1
I’m so overcome with jealousy that I can’t stand to look at the posts about someone getting their BFP. I HATE that I’m like this, but this month seemed so promising. We timed it right, my temps were going higher…then AF came three days early, and my LP dropped from 14 days to 10 days.
I had a “friend” this morning that basically rubbed in my face that she was pretty sure she’s pregnant. (I know I’m not exaggerating because the other friends involved in the group chat were pissed at her for the way she announced it. She made sure to throw in. “Oh, Peffy I hope you’re next :)”) Anyway, after she didn’t get the desired attention–she then launched into how she isn’t sure her insurance will cover the pregnancy (new job) and that she works “too late” and that she doesn’t know how she’ll make the appointments (we’re teachers) AND why didn’t she think of all this before blah blah it’s so stressful.
When I mentioned it in April that we were starting to try, she jumped in and said OMG, WE JUST DECIDED TO.. I MIGHT BE PREGNANT. Then she wasn’t. A month later, we were at a group function, and again, OMG I MIGHT BE PREGNANT…it happened every month until this month. All of our friends are annoyed with the way she keeps bringing it up, and frankly, it’s making me pretty damn angry.
I really just needed to vent. With AF coming early, my LP shortening, and this…I’m beyond my limit. On top of it, it seems my DH just doesn’t get why I feel so emotional about it all.
Post # 4
Sorry you’re feeling this way. I know how you feel, I used to feel that way sometimes. It took me 7 months of TTC ad I got frustrated. But I realized that a BFP is a blessing for anyone and I would be happy for them regardless. I kept telling myself “some day, one day, that will be me”.
And I promise you, one day it WILL be YOU.
Post # 5
I’m sorry. People like that suck. Sounds like she might be going through the same feelings as you but is handling it differently (and annoyingly at that).
Post # 6
It must be really hard, my best friend has been trying to get pregnant since January with no luck. My husband and I started to try in April and got pregnant that month. I feel really guilty about it, she says she is really happy for me but I imagine she really must feel like you feel. She is my best friend and I want to share it with her and talk about baby stuff but at the same time I don’t want to “rub it in her face” either. I think I try to be sensitive but really I am not in her shoes so I can just guess how she feels.
Maybe your friend doesn’t realize what she is doing, I would tell her how you feel. Maybe she is lacking in the sensitivity area. Is she like that with other things?
Post # 7
@Missloveknot: She’s like that with EVERYTHING. If she gets something before anyone in our group, she instantly has to tell everyone. She’ll repeat it over and over again until someone acknowledges her. And if it isn’t enough attention, she’ll go on and on.
@Lyndzo: And logically, I know this. But I just can’t keep myself from being frustrated and just negative when I see other people getting pregnant. It’s terrible but true 🙁
@PinkPinstripes: I’m not even sure they were “trying.” She just got married about six months ago, and they often fight so much they don’t even sleep in the same bed. She would tell me that they were trying and say she was pregnant every other day–but when she spoke with our other friends, she would deny that they were trying. She’s so..odd.
Post # 8
@Peffy: I smile on the outside and scream on the inside! Loudly! Seems like your friend is setting herself up for a hell of a lot of ttc disappointment.
Post # 9
Try not to get too stressed. The universe always sets every right eventually. People who act like that and gloat in the face of others have something in them that makes them incredibly insecure. Take comfort knowing your life is probably happier than hers. Or she wouldn’t have to go around trying to make herself feel important. Just my 2 cents!
Post # 10
I know, it’s horrible. I see people getting their BFPs and I AM genuinely thrilled for them..and then a little voice in my head, says I WANT IT TOO!! Take no notice of your “friend” – I have a relative who likes to drop hints that she might be pregnant and she’s been doing it on and off for two years now, like, seriously?! As far as the jealousy thing goes – try to distract yourself and forget about it. I know, I know, easier said than done. I get mad when people tell me to try to relax. I DON’T WANT TO RELAX! When I’m sad, I shop (not just over ttc/babies) so I’ve got a ‘baby box’ of neutral things that I buy when I’m struggling. Helps makes things seem a bit more real and positive!
Post # 11
I’m not sure there is a whole lot you can do. Just keep trying, try to be happy and realize that every time someone else gets a BFP they were exactly where you currently are and now they are where you hope to be soon 🙂
Post # 12
@Peffy: I’m sorry! *hugs* I had a roommate years ago that swore she was pregnant, regularly. Her claim was craving a Big Mac, because she hated them normally and only wanted one when she was pregnant with her first kid. Took her to the ER more than once, and it turned out to be dehydration from drinking Mountain Dew all the time instead of water and other stuff. She did this for 5 months. Drove me nuts!
And I know it’s hard to deal with other people especially when they end up pregnant. Some old classmates of mine have had like 5 kids, one had her 8th or 9th recently, and I just keep shaking my head and wondering if I’m meant to have any at all. I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you that you get your BFP sooner rather than later, and feel free to pm me if you want to vent!
Post # 13
@Peffy: My friend who was trying for three years told me she’s pregnant and I was sodelighted for her …. Then a little bit of jealousy crept in!!! Seriously!!! I think it’s just human nature. Then I remind myself that it’s only been 4 months so it’s all pretty normal!! Good luck getting yours! 🙂
Post # 14
@Peffy: I can commiserate. It seems like everyone and their sister is getting pregnant around me these days, and I have mini self-pity parties almost daily. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for the majority of my friends who have announced, but there are some (a family member included) who like to shove it in my face a lot, too… not to mention, some who shouldn’t even procreate having baby #2 or #3… it’s just a lot to handle.
Post # 15
I am so sorry your friend isn’t being very sensitive to your feelings. I am surprised she would continue to say every month that she might be pregnant after a few months of having it not happen. I would try to ignore her, I know people like this and they are tough to deal with. As far as the jealousy goes, don’t beat yourself up I’m sure everyone has felt this before, I know I have. What helped me was realizing that just because someone else got a BFP does not mean I am any less likely to get mine. Remembering that helped me stay sane. I also found some great inspirational quotes and kept them on my phone when I got frustrated with the process. Here’s the link, it’s an older thread but the quotes in there are really great! Good luck to you!http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/ttc-inspiration-graphic-pick-me-upthread#axzz2ZUcFdhX7
Post # 16
I can relate to feeling jealous. I’ve seen two pregnancy announcements on FB this week plus the royal baby coming and it just feels like everyone is PG but me. I would just try to change the subject when your friend brings it up. She’s obviously seeking attention.
As for your DH, I don’t think guys get it. DH has mentioned a couple times how he feels like BD is a chore now. He says people get PG all the time without trying. Well, sorry, if you don’t try during the FW, you’re out of luck! He doesn’t understand my emotions either. I have to push back my testing to try to save money and he thinks I should be happy since we’re potentially saving $400. I want to save the money but waiting another month is still hard.