(Closed) Ideal size of a wedding guest list?

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
2105 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

For me, ideal would have been 3… me, FI, and a witness.

Post # 4
Member
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We’re at 4. Me, Mr. E, and probably two witnesses, tbd. (Geographic proximity to our elopement location will probably be the deciding factor on who we ask, and if they’re busy that weekend. 🙂

Post # 6
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

Ideal wedding guest list should be close family and close friends, other than those, everyone else is “extra”!

Post # 7
Member
560 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We ended up having 50 guests, and that was perfect. We were really able to talk to everyone. We did invite a few more than that, knowing that many out-of-towners wouldn’t make it.

Post # 8
Member
5423 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2012

Ditto PPs on the small guest list.  I wanted just us and our parents..he didnt.

Post # 9
Member
8473 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I wanted exactly 100 people and had exactly 100 people lol.  If you are not in my life at the moment, you were not at my wedding. 

There were people at mine that have known me since I was born that live on my old block that asked to be invited, so we invited them.  I did not invite half of the people my mother wanted to invite.  She knew I was adamant about the number of people and it was perfect.

Post # 10
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’m a little different here as I’m one for a big celebration.  My ideal would be around 200.

Post # 11
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Our ideal guest list was around 100. It was what we could comfortably afford and we wanted to keep it to only close friends and family who we knew would attend/want to attend.

Of the 98 we invited, we anticipated 3 declines due to cousins who live far away — and those are the only 3 declines we received.

Post # 12
Member
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We had about 70 guests; of those, there were only about 5 people that either then-Fi-now-DH or I didn’t personally know before the wedding– the girlfriend of a mutual friend, the boyfriend of another, etc.  

Our day FLEW by and I honestly didn’t get to spend more than 3 minutes with about 75% of those folks; there were definitely folks I felt bad for not spending more time with, including a friend of mine for 20+ years who I managed only to give a hug to throughout the whole reception.

You will be pulled in 100 different directions during the wedding so if you truly want to spend time with your guests, then you need a long reception, and a small guest list. 

Personally I think our group of 70 was just about right; there are a few people that, in hindsight, I would have liked to invite, but not to the point where I feel we’ve strained any relationships, and a few people who were invited but not able to attend. But almost everyone there was someone we know and love, which was really important to us.  I don’t think inviting my mom’s friends (his parents are overseas so inviting their friends would have been aimless as not too many people will come from overseas for a wedding of someone they barely know), casual acquaintances or the mailman would have in any way enhanced the day!  We did invite the co-workers that we consider friends— the people we’ve done things with outside of work before and will continue to be friends with if we change jobs— but I don’t regret not inviting my manager or my teammates that I’m not close with.

Post # 13
Member
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

50 or less. I like intimate weddings where all of the guests are close to the bride and groom.

Post # 14
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

No one was invited to the wedding that neither of us knew. Family friends were people who cared about/were important to us. We ended up with a little over 100, and it was a good number for us. (Although we both would have loved around 70-75)

I only invited one out of twelve cousins. If I hadn’t seen someone in five+ years, why should they warrant an invite?

Post # 15
Member
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

I want about 150, because I want people to be able to mingle and have the chance to meet all sorts of new people, and I want the dancefloor to never be empty.

But realistically, given the location we have chosen, it will probably be closer to 50. Oh well. If they all come and enjoy themselves and dance and get tipsy and drive home soberly and safely (or taxi their drunk asses to a local hotel) and have good memories of the event, then that’s good enough for me.

Besides, there are good things about smaller guest list. Like the fact that what you save on food can be put into Chiavari chairs–especially since you’ll need fewer of them.

Post # 16
Member
6745 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

50 or less for me, but it depends on what your ideal wedding is.  My ideal wedding is a small intimate gathering.  My friend’s ideal wedding is a big party and so her list is capped at 200. 

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