Post # 1
Background: My parents are divorced and strongly dislike each other. My mom and dad’s sister were good friends but now really dislike each other. My mom & step-mom are enemies. None of them will actively be mean to one another but they tend to get offended and whine about one another<br>
My aunt (who is single with no kids) has been so helpful with my wedding. I would love to recognize her somehow during the course of the evening but without stepping on anyone’s toes (i.e. can’t recognize her in the same way I recognize the moms).
I also have my step-mom and step-brothers who I would like to recognize/include. I have my maternal and paternal grandparents that I’d like to recognize as well.
Should I just do one big toast and thank them all? Can I find seperate and distinct roles for each of them so they feel included and recognized? What would you do?
Post # 3
I don’t think you need to assign them special roles or jobs to distinguish them. You could list “guests of honor” in your programs perhaps, and reserve them all seat in the first few rows for the ceremony. I think you could get your Aunt and grandparents a corsage/bout. to wear.
As far as offending the moms, they are adults. They should be able to put aside their petty differences for a day. Regardless of their feelings for eachother, they should be able to recognize that they are important to you, and treat you well.
Post # 4
I agree with PP. If you really need to give them “jobs”, consider letting them do a reading or hand out programs or something.
Post # 5
I don’t know it seems pretty odd to me that they need some kind of special public acknowledgement. My Fi going to say a few words to thank our families and that about it. Any other acknowledgement will be done privately on a case by case basis.
So send your aunt a thank you card and take her out for lunch or a spa gift. If you having a program I guess you can list your step siblings.
ps: I see the whole let them hand out programs/be in charge of guestbook advice on the bee. I actually think you can offend people that way. Let them come and enjoy the wedding without working, I don’t think it’s a honor to put guest and family members to work on the day of the wedding. But that just me.